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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take my six year old on a nightly walk?

458 replies

AddisonM · 06/12/2020 11:21

I need to lose some weight. I’ve been struggling with undiagnosed depression and I’m trying to dig my way out. I have been following a friend on Facebook who has dropped three stone since January just by walking. She walks every single night for miles. She looks fab.

I used to run and go to the gym but I can’t seem to muster the energy or confidence right now. So maybe a long evening walk is the way forward.

My six year old daughter is a bit prone to laziness and doesn’t really do much exercise. She’s not keen on it and I find this a bit difficult to accept, tbh (I mean I get that she doesn’t like it but it’s important to be healthy and she has couch potato tendencies). I’m thinking about taking her with me on these walks. I don’t know how up for it she will be but she’s quite clingy with me just now so she may come along just to be with me. I thought it would be nice. We could chat. We walk to school every day and I quite enjoy it.

Husband not keen on the idea (he would be at home with three year old, who wouldn’t walk far enough). Says it’s up to me, but thinks it’s a bit dark and cold and that she wouldn’t enjoy it.

Has anyone else done this?

OP posts:
littleharissa · 06/12/2020 17:41

but a walk in the cold and dark just sounds really joyless and boring.

I feel sorry for you that you cannot find joy in a walk in the cold and dark.

formerbabe · 06/12/2020 17:43

@littleharissa

but a walk in the cold and dark just sounds really joyless and boring.

I feel sorry for you that you cannot find joy in a walk in the cold and dark.

Why is enjoying a walk in the cold and dark seen as so superior to reading a book indoors?
NoPainNoTartine · 06/12/2020 17:46

but a walk in the cold and dark just sounds really joyless and boring.

If you leave in the UK, the alternative is to be stuck home all day and I can't think of anything worst. It's lovely at this time of the year with all the Christmas lights, last week it was so foggy my kids had a blast as the youngest felt it was a real adventure.

SleepingStandingUp · 06/12/2020 17:50

I recommend you keep your dark cold wet dangerous walks to yourself. (Or start a class yourself eg Zumba). If police saw you taking a 6yo on a long night walk your be reported to SS. Id report it personally too.
Oh you'd love me @crystaltips98. I don't drive so DTwins come in the pushchair on school run. Sometimes we have to go to the pharmacy or shops after school so I'm walking around on the dark with a 5 year old and 1 year old twins (in a buggy) in the dark and rain. Twins are under rain covers and older one is told to put his hood up. Evil I am.

formerbabe · 06/12/2020 17:52

Yeah but you're not doing it for fun are you @sleepingstandingup ?

Parker231 · 06/12/2020 17:52

No wonder children have so many problems when they are encouraged to stay indoors on the sofa rather than going for a walk with their parent. They should be outdoors exercising every day unless they are snowflake who will fade away in the winter weather. It’s the UK not the depth of Montana.

JJsDinerWaffles · 06/12/2020 17:52

My kids absolutely love ‘dark walks.’ It’s the only time they willingly go for a walk. I’m shocked anyone would have an issue with this. But yes don’t force her if she doesn’t feel like it.

SleepingStandingUp · 06/12/2020 17:53

@formerbabe

Yeah but you're not doing it for fun are you *@sleepingstandingup* ?
How would the pp know that when she's phoning the Police? She's just see an evil mother making her children walk around getting darked on in the rain
formerbabe · 06/12/2020 17:53

@NoPainNoTartine

but a walk in the cold and dark just sounds really joyless and boring.

If you leave in the UK, the alternative is to be stuck home all day and I can't think of anything worst. It's lovely at this time of the year with all the Christmas lights, last week it was so foggy my kids had a blast as the youngest felt it was a real adventure.

Well yeah I take my dc out so they can exercise and get fresh air if there's nothing else to do...I wouldn't bother if I didn't have dc and I wouldn't take them walking if there was a more interesting activity available like swimming, climbing walls, bowling etc
AccidentallyOnPurpose · 06/12/2020 17:54

Why is enjoying a walk in the cold and dark seen as so superior to reading a book indoors?

Because walking is the new MN obsession and paradigm of virtue. On part with washing everything daily,not having a toilet brush and eating avocado on toast and huge,filling(always!) salads.

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 06/12/2020 17:54

I've taken my three year old out to look at the Christmas lights where we live every other night. We love it. It's not dangerous.

midnightstar66 · 06/12/2020 17:55

*Why is enjoying a walk in the cold and dark seen as so superior to reading a book indoors?

Because walking is the new MN obsession and paradigm of virtue. On part with washing everything daily,not having a toilet brush and eating avocado on toast and huge,filling(always!) salads.*

Or maybe that most people can do and enjoy both at different times

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 06/12/2020 17:56

It's not superior to reading a book in the warm. It's another good thing to do. All of these things feed our mental and physical health. It's not like you can only walk for pleasure or you can only read for pleasure.

GrumpySausage · 06/12/2020 18:00

We've just got back from our walk with 2year old DD and 5 year old DS. Plenty of fun looking for Christmas lights and wrapped up in layers galore.

I'll await my phone call from SS.

formerbabe · 06/12/2020 18:04

@CarterBeatsTheDevil

It's not superior to reading a book in the warm. It's another good thing to do. All of these things feed our mental and physical health. It's not like you can only walk for pleasure or you can only read for pleasure.
But walking in the dark and cold wouldn't be pleasurable for me. If you do enjoy that, then fine, but dont make out that it makes you morally superior
TheOtherMaryBerry · 06/12/2020 18:05

I thought going for at least one walk a day with your children was a perfectly normal part of parenting, on par with "feeding them" or "talking to them."

You'd be amazed. I remember a thread some time ago when a poster who was stuck at home wanted advice on how to entertain her toddler all day inside and so many posters were amazed at people who go out every day. I remember being told I was unkind to my DS by making him have some exercise every day.

Why is enjoying a walk in the cold and dark seen as so superior to reading a book indoors?

It isn't... they're both really great. There's plenty of time for a bit of everything.

AccidentallyOnPurpose · 06/12/2020 18:05

@midnightstar66

*Why is enjoying a walk in the cold and dark seen as so superior to reading a book indoors?

Because walking is the new MN obsession and paradigm of virtue. On part with washing everything daily,not having a toilet brush and eating avocado on toast and huge,filling(always!) salads.*

Or maybe that most people can do and enjoy both at different times

I've been on here for a few years. 4-5 years ago there were no threads waxing lyrical about how wonderful walking is,how you must walk once a day and what not.

I don't doubt people have walked for leisure for years and years, but lately it's become rather fanatical and the answer to all that might be wrong in someone's life.

HollyandIvyandallthingsYule · 06/12/2020 18:07

@CarterBeatsTheDevil

It's not superior to reading a book in the warm. It's another good thing to do. All of these things feed our mental and physical health. It's not like you can only walk for pleasure or you can only read for pleasure.
This. 100%

I love reading, I love watching classic films; I love being at home & doing cosy & leisurely things. I’ve got absolutely no time for those who think there’s some kind of moral imperative to avoid spoiling myself - If I want to have two baths in a day, I will. If I want to eat junk food, or loads of good food, or have some wine/whisky/whatever, I will. If I want to spend the whole day snuggled in bed watching Hallmark Christmas films, I will. Etc etc.

I also absolutely love going for evening walks. It’s good for my health and especially good for my mental well-being. I really enjoy being bundled up warm and feeling the bracing cold, it’s invigorating. I literally don’t give a moment’s thought as to whether or not it’s superior to any other activity (or non-activity), I just do it because it’s something I enjoy doing. If I had young children I’d be taking them out to look at the lights in the dark too.

MeeshW · 06/12/2020 18:20

Get her on a scooter or bike otherwise it won't be much of a workout.

muddyford · 06/12/2020 18:24

I walked in the evening with my father all year round. We didn't if it was pouring with rain but the winter evenings in fog, frost or snow were wonderful times. This time of year there is so much to look at with Christmas trees and lights and I would give it a try. If you or your daughter don't enjoy it, you can stop. Mak sure you are both wrapped up warmly.

littleharissa · 06/12/2020 18:26

@formerbabe

It's not seen as superior at all Hmm

crystaltips98 · 06/12/2020 18:28

@SleepingStandingUp i didnt suggest that. I think its a good idea to try it. Think you tagged the wrong username Confused

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 06/12/2020 18:32

No one has to go for a walk if they don't want to, but there are a lot of people on this thread assuming that OP's daughter will hate it because they don't like walking themselves. I think it's nice that OP is trying to get out and get moving and nice that she thought of asking her daughter to come with her.

Original poster
AddisonM · 06/12/2020 18:32

For what it’s worth, I have no intention of taking her out in the driving rain Confused I live on the east coast of Scotland. Whilst there are of course wet evenings we get a lot of beautiful clear skies as well.

OP posts:
NerrSnerr · 06/12/2020 18:35

We've been out for our walk- was out for 45 minutes and nothing awful happened. Wasn't far as have a slow 3 year old but lots of lights seen including Santa waving from a window.

It's not superior to reading a book but nice to get out the house.