To use the toilet like a normal person?

[GlummyMcGlummerson]

I'm sure I'm not the only one to notice that MN has some very strong views about toilets and using them. There's a (brilliant) thread today about annoying things about other people's homes and there's so many comments about the toilet being next to living rooms (therefore people can hear you wee), toilet brushes, "disgusting" bins in toilets, fake tan stains on lids (that reminds people that other people's bums have been there) etc. I've also seen countless other threads about people hovering in public loo's too or people avoiding having a poo when out and about or even at work.

AIBU or am I the only one who uses someone else's toilet or a public toilet like this:

• i don't line the seat with toilet paper
• I sit my bum on the seat and don't hover
• I don't care if people hear me wee - we all do it, do you think they expect a silent wee?!
• I don't even care if they hear me poo
• I dispose of my Sanpro, in a tied nappy bag, in other people's bathroom bins and I don't care if they do it in my bin
• I let workmen and delivery drivers use my loo and don't have a nervous breakdown if they have a poo
• I poo in toilets that are somewhere other than my own home and I don't feel shameful about it
• I don't mind if a house set up means going into another room to wash my hands
• I can cope with the fact that other people's arses sit on toilets
• I am utterly indifferent about toilet brushes

Am I the only one?

I used to know where every toilet was in town. The best ones were in the library, and Waterstones book shop. They were the best because no one knew they were there, so always had them to myself. Sad that they've closed down now.

But yes, I'm with you. But don't like any one hearing noises or smelling smells if I can help it.

No hovering unless seat is wet from the weird hover brigade

But why wouldn't you just dry the seat with toilet paper and sit down like a normal person?

Unless you're in the habit of licking the back of your own thighs, it's not like any harm will be done by the possibility of homeopathic level urine residue on the seat .

I'm with you OP, totally baffled by all the batshittery about toilets, especially the people who seem to think that everyone should be able to time their poos so they only do them at home.

I think one of the weirdest things I ever read was about someone who had never pooed in her own toilet as could not bear thought of her partner going into a smelly bathroom caused by her!!

@LST
Shameful? 😂
I’ve not had anyone work at my home all day, it’s been 2 separate delivery drivers, of an appliance and an item of furniture, and one bloke who came to fix washing machine who was there for 15mins tops, the one that put me off was the man who came to read my meter once who had a piddle parade in my bathroom! So no they weren’t tradesmen and no I won’t be letting anyone use my facilities. It was disgusting and I’m not obliged to let them am I. Not that I have to explain myself.

I'm the same apart from handwashing in another room. Would prefer it in the same room because of the door handle...!

Meh. I wouldn't poo anywhere but home, I use a menstrual cup and reusable pads so nothing to bin and I would be a bit 🤢 about anyone disposing of their used sanitary towels in my bin. I don't need to know if anyone poo's in my toilet so long as they deal with any mess. Different strokes init.

You are not alone.

I'm completely with you except for the poo issue. But I have no control over that. It just happens. Even when we go away it takes me about two days to be able to poo, but after that I'm fine. However if we're only gone overnight(which is often the case) I only end up doing it at home.

I'm with you on most of that except that I can't poo anywhere other than home (or my own hotel room, on holiday). It's not actually a conscious decision. I once went 5 days without the urge to go, because I was visiting someone. Within an hour of getting home, I had to. It was quite strange.

I'm particularly bewildered by anyone not letting workmen use your loo. It's a basic human need. If someone's working in your house, why on earth would you not let them?

YANBU at all. I don’t need shampoo and a special towel if I suddenly need an emergency shit I am an anomaly judging by a thread the other week. Surely if you have to shit in public you just wipe carefully and be on your way? Not run back and forth with a shitty tissue in your hand?!

and I would be a bit 🤢 about anyone disposing of their used sanitary towels in my bin

From that comment I’m sure your mum still empties your bin so shouldn’t affect you

@Unicant

same. thanks for saying this. Feel like I'm going mad on mumsmet sometimes.. like I must be some kind of grim demon. I also sometimes go outside with wet hair and I also sometimes wear my dressing gown to answer the door to the postman or take put the recycling late at night. Sorry not sorry.

You devil you. I bet you sometimes even answer the door when you aren’t expecting anyone.

Sorry, I forgot the

I answer the door without a bra on... because I don't wear one in the house.

Should be burned at the stake really.. by people wearing hazmat suits ideally.

I agree with every single one of your points, OP. Well, if I'm going to be the one cleaning a particular toilet I would like there to be a toilet brush, but I don't care what arrangement they have for anyone else's toilet.

And YY to the wet hair person too.

I restrict breathing to reduce my smell...

Eh? You do know that your trying not to inhale doesn't actually cause a reduction in odour?

@CharitySchmarity

I agree with every single one of your points, OP. Well, if I'm going to be the one cleaning a particular toilet I would like there to be a toilet brush, but I don't care what arrangement they have for anyone else's toilet.

And YY to the wet hair person too.

It always baffle me when posters don't have a toilet brush because "ew ew ew" 5yo style, but then moan someone shat in their toilet and left a mark or three . How exactly are they supposed to clean it off?

Im with a PP re IBS... when I need to go , I need to go now.
I've never understood the toilet etiquette. If I need to change a pad, I will and I'll roll it up and put it in a bin. If there's a bin in someone else's house , I'll use it.
If someone needs to throw a pad away in my house, they can throw it in the bin.
I saw the other thread... I'm stunned that people choose to not have bins near toilets. It makes people like me feel bad. Must I put my pad in my handbag or pocket? Just because you are icky about having a bin near your toilet?

I don't care as long as it's clean! Dh used to be weird about it but since having bowel cancer he gets no choice.

We have bins and brushes in both our toilets and happily let people use them. I hate that desperate urge to go but can't find anywhere so wouldn't put anyone in my home in that position.

Haven't RTFT yet, but I completely agree with you OP. People on here are neurotic. Goodness knows what they're teaching their children. The way people talk about toilets on here is just insanity.

I also think it's really fucking rude to refuse to allow workmen to use your loo if they're doing work on your home. It's their workplace for the day. I wouldn't work at any workplace without a loo.

Apart from lining the toilet seat of public loos as I don't now how clean they are (and sadly you can catch things from loo seats) I am with you.

One thing I really don't understand is these people that only poo at home. How do they achieve this feat? If I have to go I have to go. I can sometimes hold it fir a short time but not for hours and hours. I'd be in all sorts of bother.

YANBU, except for this:

I don't mind if a house set up means going into another room to wash my hands
because this is just gross.

I saw the other thread... I'm stunned that people choose to not have bins near toilets. It makes people like me feel bad. Must I put my pad in my handbag or pocket? Just because you are icky about having a bin near your toilet?

Where were you a few years ago when there was a thread about leaving sanpro available for guests, bins in bathrooms, and what to put in them?

(One particular poster had a recycling bin in her bathroom and saw nothing wrong with guests having to put rolled up pads or tampons in their bags. Some of the posts were actually hostile and resentful abut the fact that women menstruate).

I'm the same as you. We all do it so why try be secretive about it. We go caravanning and have done so since I was a kid, this year obviously things have been different and where i live most camp sites were closed due to covid, there were a few weeks they reopened but some only catered for those deemed 'self sufficient', in other words you had a toilet/shower in your caravan. Made sense to me, no sharing toilet blocks etc but on the various caravan groups on Facebook the amount of disgust shown for people who used the toilet in their caravan was unbelievable. Some went as far as saying the campsites were discriminating against those who thought using their own toilet/shower was dirty. I was astonished at the huge number who had paid big money for fancy caravans but would still trap across a campsite (probably in the rain) in the middle of the night to take a piss.

Finally some sanity.

I too have very low loo anxiety.