I just want to go home

[welshpixie]

First off I know we should all worship the NHS, and I am a great supporter, but this is too much.
I was sent to hospital no.1 in June with suspected heart issues ( vessel disease and a dodgy aortic valve) 2 weeks later I got sent home, after numerous tests that said I needed by-pass surgery and being put on a transfer list to the main university hospital for surgery.
Fast forward to 11th November I has similar symptoms again, this time I was sent to bigger hospital (No. 2).
Unfortunately someone in the acute unit tested positive for covid, so I was classed as a contact and had to be isolated for 2 weeks, fair enough if somewhat annoying.
I was then moved to BIG university hospital (No.3) for surgery, was told it would be asap s I had been waiting so long. Arrive in No.3 to be told may be next week depending on the bed situation, Now for the kicker, I was due to go for surgery today, had all pre op tests. maerked up where the vessels were being removed from, woken at 6 despite me saying I thought I as second on the list, still had to be up to watch others have breakfast, showered in their special soap, more faffing and then wait. AND WAIT AND WAIT
at 1.30 the head boss came in and said very sorry we can't do it today, its being postponed till Tuesday.
I am not allowed home to see my partner, he can't visit me, I am 1.5 hours away from home, and the stupid man stood there and said "I understand how you feel". No you bloody well don't, I haven't seen any of my family in over 3 weeks and you casually claim you understand.
Am AIBU in thinking this Covid paranoia has gone too far and if we treated prisoners in this way there would be an outcry.

[Inkpaperstars]

I don't worship the NHS at all, it's not a monolith and there are admirable things and people within it, but equally it is often unfit for purpose.

I am sorry for what you have been going through OP it sounds shit and I would be feeling the same and desperate to get home. Really hope that things don't get delayed further.

I don't think it is paranoia to try and limit the risk of Covid in hospitals and on acute wards though...that is pretty much essential,

[HannaYeah]

That sounds really terrible and I’m sorry you are in this situation.

I know it’s not a viable option to just discharge yourself but you can at least fantasize about telling them off and walking out.

Do you have things you can do/read/watch to keep you occupied?

Here’s one of my favorite entertaining videos for a few minutes of entertainment

m.youtube.com/watch?v=dTAAsCNK7RA

[SchrodingersImmigrant]

Friend is from mainland Europe and she tells me the NHS is the topic of a lot of jokes in her country about how rubbish the service is.

It is in more than just her country. I know many people who fly back home when they need some stuff done.
My family is still bit gobsmacked that there doesn't seem to be preventative stuff on the level we have. Yearly smears from when you start being sexually active, yearly gyno check up, yearly dentist check up, biannual blood works and check up, mammographic screening every 2 years when over 45 and so on.
I did have an amazing GP though here. I miss him. I don't like the move and de register rule.

Anyway.
Op, my dad had bypass and he did ok after. You will be ok too. 🤞
It's scary though, isn't it. And the waiting isn't helping. Can you video call your family or not? I know it's not ot, but it is something.

[SchrodingersImmigrant]

@hannaYeah 😂 That's a good one!

[SickToDeathOfThis]

I❤️Schrodinger’sImmigrant! 😁

[SchrodingersImmigrant]

@SickToDeathOfThis now this would be a badge I would get behind😂

I am adding to @HannaYeah video with my submission

[SlB09]

Covid paranoia - absolutely not. Having treated people with this virus and those dying from it, in no way us it paranoid.

I understand you must be massively frustrated and that's understandable but from the other side, my husband is one of the 'big boss' people who have to make these decisions and deliver this news. He hasn't seen his parents for 10months, days where these decisions/news is delivered are horrendous and take their toll emotionally, it won't have been just you he will have had to talk to - keeping a lid on his own frustration, anger on the patients behalf, pressure from limited capacity all the while more patients flood in, trying to keep a workforce motivated to carry on when everyone's resilience is failing. They are human and they feel it too, believe me there is alot that goes on behind that 'I understand'.

I truly hope you get your surgery on Tuesday and that it makes the world of difference to you.

[Guylan]

@amicissimma

What's the US got to do with anything? There are rather more than 2 health care models in the world.

But it is v clear that this govt would only switch to the private for profit US style system which I vehemently do not want and would choose NHS any day over the US model.

Sorry to hear what a horrible time you are having OP.

[Bunnybigears]

Its awful but stick with it. My DF had an operation to drain a bleed on the brain cancelled 6 times in October, 3 of the times he actually made it into the operating room before they took him back up to the ward because emergencies had come in.

[Guylan]

Ps I missed your bit at the end where you refer to CoVid paranoia. This I do not agree with. As SIB09 said it is not paranoia. You are not unreasonable to be fed up but it’s the important cautions hospitals must make regarding CoVid are not paranoia and v necessary.

[Trumpetpants]

Aww bless you, its hard I know. But at least you are still on a ward, and not sent home to wait for ages.
My relative had various heart procedures and eventually open heart surgery and at each visit we saw people who had fasted and travelled quite some distance being sent away. Heartbreaking for them and their loved ones. One man that I shall never forget was sent home 3 times! Then on his fourth admission surgery delayed, he lived 60 miles away and his wife came on the bus every day to see him. So sad, you are not alone and I wouldn't wish this on anyone.
Gentle hugs and really hope it goes ahead on Tuesday x

[Guylan]

• no ‘it’s’ in second sentence above.

[Guylan]

@SIB09, thank you for all you and your husband are doing

[SadlyMe]

I understand your frustration but seriously - you haven't seen your family in 3 weeks? I haven't seen mine since March and have no likelihood of that changing unless covid fucks off or the planned vaccination roll out works.

[RozHuntleysStump]

NHS is shite. Feel for you, you poor thing. Don’t know why it’s so beloved. It’s a massive money sink that gives very poor service.

Be thankful you didn’t get as far as one friend of mine who’d actually been put under and wheeled into the OT just for them to discover they didn’t have the relevant equipment. Another friend nearly had the same shoulder done twice instead of the other one. I mean ffs.

[SeaToSki]

ENOUGH of the America bashing. It has nothing to do with poor OP who is clearly very ill, has major surgery ahead of her and is having to wait yet again with no promise that tomorrow her surgery will finally happen.

Btw, if she was living in America she would almost certainly have had the surgery in June. Whether or not she would have had to pay a few hundred dollars or a few thousand dollars, she would have been treated (and she would have had a private room in the hospital too). Sorry to be snippy but I’m fed up with all the USA negativity

[Porcupineinwaiting]

COVID paranoia? ODFOD You're bloody lucky they're paranoid, might be what's keeping you alive.

[sneakysnoopysniper]

We dont have a National Health Service. We have a National Corona Service and others who have paid into the system for years via rip off taxes are being left to DIE. I would be angry too.

[Staffy1]

sorry OP, what you are going through is crap, but Tuesday will get here soon and hopefully you will be first on the list. Best wishes for your surgery.
The NHS is far from perfect, it doesn't work that well when it comes to trying to get a diagnosis as each department is only interested in their own speciality and there is no one to look at the whole picture. Also, the organisation is lacking. My son went in for a 20 minute procedure the other day. He had to have an X-ray first which took 10 minutes and in that time they decided to put someone ahead of him whose operation took 2 hours. It wasn't any more urgent than ours, as I heard them discussing that they could do them in any order. We ended up leaving the hospital at 4:30 after having to get there's at 7:45 for what should have been an hour at the very most. This is not the first time of waiting around all day (just to be discharged another time). They can't cope with the population and appointments which should be followed up often are once a year, which is pointless. One of the consultants I get to see once a year decided the appointment would just be a letter following the usual blood tests that precede the appointment. How ridiculous is that, not even a telephone appointment? And to make it worse, the letter never came.

[welshpixie]

What I meant by covid paranoia is the testing, I was tested on day 1,5 and 14 in one hospital, then tested again as I arrived in the next hospital. and when I asked why it had to be done again I was told it was because they would not accept tests from another trust. That is where it gets ridiculous. They will accept results from an angiogram done in the first trust though, but not an X-ray.
I found out the reason for the delay was a lack of ICU nurses, fair enough these things happen, unfortunately one of the nurses on duty last night let slip she was an ICU nurse who had not done ward work for many years.

[countbackfromten]

We plan an operating list but to cancel a later case on the day isn’t done all that frequently - at my hospitals we are trying even harder now because we know how the covid restrictions are impacting on people and we are desperate to keep operating. Which often means starting cases late and finishing really late.

You don’t know why you were cancelled but from my experience (especially with late cancellations like yours) it could be that something happened in the first operation - a complication - that means they have to keep going over the time they thought or something even worse. There are usually only ever 2 cardiac surgery patients on a list because they are long, often very complex procedures.

It is rubbish but it is likely that at least one persons day was far far worse than yours in this situation. I have sadly seen it first time and they would not have cancelled without a good reason but might not be able to explain that because of confidentiality.

[countbackfromten]

Just saw your update - if there wasn’t capacity in intensive care because of a lack of a nurse than cancelling was absolutely the safest thing to do for you. Full stop!!

[countbackfromten]

And we are “paranoid” about covid because the death rates for patients who have surgery and have covid are much much higher. We are trying to protect you!!

[Backbee]

Surgeries and ops have been delayed many times, and for years and years. Doesn't make it any less frustrating for you, but that and the multiple tests are different issues really. Those in ICU require constant care and monitoring, and absolutely the right thing to do if they do not have the staff to safely do this is to cancel; they have already waived some of the training and experience needed some places for ICU nurses, they can't do much more to bolster staffing short of compromising standards.

[Lonecatwithkitten]

We have a system with finite resources and clinicians have to make tough divisions about who gets those resources.
No surgeon wants to tell a patient who is prepped for Theatre that they are having to postpone due to lack of resources.
Unfortunately this is the system we currently have, we could move to US almost completely private, French standard care covered you pay insurance to give the top ups you want or German much higher taxes, but high level service free at the point of care. There are multiple options all involve paying more in different ways.