To never let my ex have my dog ever again?

[RaggedyDoll1]

Long story short ex and I split two years ish ago and ex never bothered about the dog.
I moved back in with ex briefly to get on my feet to buy a house (ex was living in a house rented from me at the time, I wasn't living off ex, my own properly if relevant).

Suddenly wants to have dog for 3 weeks I said no,a week max.

Last week ex arranged for their colleague to collect dog from me and I let it happen.

For last two days ex has ignored my calls and messages asking how dog is.
I ring exs housemate (mutual friend) last night and ex isnt there. The story I was given is, that exs new partner has been staying for a few days and has broken her glasses..in order to get some more glasses, has had them delivered to her house which is in Scotland, a two hour drive from where ex lives. So she has had to go and collect them and taken ex with her.

I have 3 issues with this.

1. I specifically said not to leave dog with housemate. Ex knows I dont like that and didnt when I lived with them
2. I dont like that ex doesnt answer my msgs as ex knows I'd be anxious at this situation.
3. ex was very abusive to me when we were together and I believe 2)is just a form of control. One msg back would be fine, I've only sent more (hours apart,I havent been pestering) because I didnt get a reply.

Also I know the glasses thing is a lie!
Who the feck would drive a 2 hr journey in this situation?! Why not just buy some cheap ones for now or get them delivered to ex's house?
And how stupid do they think I am.. if girlfriend needs glasses that badly how is she driving in the dark for two hours while unable to see (Ex cant drive)??

I know not everyone likes dogs and I may sound precious. Fwiw I've had ddog since birth however (he was an reject) and am very attached plus I was very depressed when ex left and honestly do not know where I'd have been without ddog at times.

Wibu to veto any dog 'visitations' in future?

Go and get the dog now. No drama, just I may as well take my dog as he isn't with the person that actually choose to look after him. If ex is still in your property I'd think about giving him notice there's no reason to still know someone who was abusive to you in the past.

Oh ffs, go get your dog, and then block his number.

This is very odd, why on earth did you hand the poor dog over to him ???

Collect your dog. Forget the ex.

It sounds like the drama is because you want him back (otherwise why else would you lend him your dog) and are cross he is off seeing his gf.

Sod that, I would be right round getting the dog now, I would be raging.
Go get your dog and ignore all further communication from him like he has done with you, in fact block the twat.

What?! Go get your dog NOW. Never allow your ex to have him again. Who gives a crap if you "look like a drama queen"? You'll look like a responsible dog owner! Go. Now. If someone did that with either of my dogs, I would be over in a shot and not speaking to that person again unless they grovelled, and even then it would be a maybe.

I am working nights and It's a 3 and a half hour round trip. However I definitely will if I haven't heard from them by the time I finish tomorrow morning.

I am seriously annoyed. I cant block as she is my tenant.

Animal welfare is a permitted reason to travel. If you have reason to believe your dog isn't been cared for properly, go and get him.

You need to go and get your dog and give your ex notice to leave your house. I have no idea why you let your dog be taken by a colleague of your ex or why you thought it would be a good idea to let your ex have the dog when he had not previously shown any interest. Abusive people are not generally known for treating animals better than people.

You seem too hung up on the lie about his girlfriends glasses and him thinking you are a drama queen. Neither are remotely relevant. Your priority should be the welfare of your dog followed by freeing yourself from contact with an abusive ex partner who you believe is playing mind games.

It sounds like the drama is because you want him back (otherwise why else would you lend him your dog) and are cross he is off seeing his gf. This.....

Are you working now? If not , take leave for your shift coming up and get your dog now. Tell them it's a family emergency - which it is - from the sound of it I wouldn't trust ex to care for your dog. I'd be worried he'd try and keep him ad well , just to wind you up. If you are working leave as soon as your shift finishes and go get him

I would go and get the dog now. She is your dog and you do not have to share her. I wouldn't let him within a mile of her ever again

It sounds like the drama is because you want him back (otherwise why else would you lend him your dog) and are cross he is off seeing his gf.

Agreed

It sounds like the drama is because you want him back (otherwise why else would you lend him your dog) and are cross he is off seeing his gf.This.....

I don't care at all where ex (female) IS, (nor who with) I only care where she isn't and that she has left the dog in the care of someone else after making a fuss of wanting to look after him.

Apologies OP. I got it wrong.

Still think you should go get your dog as soon as you can though.

Yeah, it’s crazy she has asked to have the dog and then just left it.

I would go nc once you get the dog back.

There’s way too much drama here. Just get the dog when you are supposed to and don’t share it in future.

Thank you for the advice all, I'm thankful

I'm not sure why people have the impression I want her back. I have a new partner and moved on a long time ago, but although ddog is in my name we had him together for a long time.

I moved back in while buying a house because it is my house and I had nowhere else to go without a lot of expense.

Is she still in your house?

I didn't think you wanted ex back, but must apologise for assuming it was a chap -my bad. When are you going for your dog?

Yes she is.
Dont apologise for that, easy assumption, one I may make myself as I didnt specify.

Does she have a tenancy agreement with you?

Well she has sent a photo of ddog now supposedly fine albeit looking miserable. Now her phone is off. I still want to go after work. Lack of contact and lies about wanting the dog then staying out overnight (i know this now) has angered me.

Ffs it's a dog not a child. You don't have to share custody!

So she's seeing her girlfriend this weekend? She asked to have your dog? The girlfriend has broken glasses? The dog is with a house share person you dislike?
Now you're getting photos of dog looking sad?

To save yourself a whole lot of drama, don't let the them have the dog again, and cease contact.. It can be as hard, or as easy as you make it from that point in. You've both moved on. Keep it that way now, it really is that simple.

I think they had gone away together and told housemate to tell me the glasses tale to make sure I didnt find out.
She begged to have the dog saying she really missed her etc (i moved out of the house early last month).

I cant cease contact as she is my tenant.
I am going to get her in the morning and I'll not let her go again.