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Original poster

Bloody Elf turns up in a balloon now

437 replies

DressingGownofDoom · 01/12/2020 12:59

I know IABU and a curmudgeon but why does everything have to be such an exhibition at Christmas? Elves can't just appear this year they have to float from Lapland in a balloon with a present Confused I know, I know if you don't like it don't do it. That's fine but I do feel sorry for the kids whose parents don't have £15 to spend on an elf balloon and then a present on top just because it's the first of December. I thought this year might make us all step back and maybe consider a simpler celebration of Christmas but no, the social media onslaught of who can be the most ostentatious Christmas fanatic is worse than ever. I hate it.

Bloody Elf turns up in a balloon now
OP posts:
theThreeofWeevils · 01/12/2020 16:56

The idea of quarantining the creepy little fucker in a jar for a fortnight is pure genius.

SleepingStandingUp · 01/12/2020 16:57

[quote EggBobbin]@SleepingStandingUp don’t worry- you can pop it in the Woodburner.[/quote]
I'm working class, I assume you mean the pile of wood in the garden left over from bonfire night

YouAreAmazing0 · 01/12/2020 16:59

This reply has been deleted

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ComeOnBabyHauntMyBubble · 01/12/2020 17:00

Well because you can explain to a 4 or 5 year old that they cant have an expensive day out because mummy and daddy have to save their money for bills, but you can't exactly explain that the magic elf doesn't bother coming to them in a daft balloon unless you make up some kind of elf admin fee or just tell them Christmas is all a swizz.

Ours came as he usually does. Under the tree with a letter and an advent calendar(80p reduced in the food shop). DD is just happy he's here.
Some of her friends have had theirs arrive days/weeks ago.

"Well Elfie must be very busy if he hasn't arrived yet. He is not supposed to come till December 1st anyways".

Simples.

RedToothBrush · 01/12/2020 17:03

Well because you can explain to a 4 or 5 year old that they cant have an expensive day out because mummy and daddy have to save their money for bills, but you can't exactly explain that the magic elf doesn't bother coming to them in a daft balloon unless you make up some kind of elf admin fee or just tell them Christmas is all a swizz.

Quite.

Magical elf is not so magical if you have to spend £££ on it.

EggBobbin · 01/12/2020 17:05

@SleepingStandingUp we MC types call that a bug hotel or wildlife area Wink

Ilikeviognier · 01/12/2020 17:07

Meh. Ours turned up with advent calendars and letters from Santa. That’s it. They might move around a bit over the next few weeks but that will be it! There won’t be any outfit changes or abseiling.

Flowerblue · 01/12/2020 17:10

Yep. Most of the 7/8 year olds chat in my class was elf and advent calendar related today. Not all competitive, but some puzzlement as to why some households had an elf and not others. They are all pretty excited already though!

NewlyGranny · 01/12/2020 17:13

Mucky1, where is that girl elf's hand?! 😂

D4rwin · 01/12/2020 17:17

We are a creepy surveillance trainer free here Grin though I was amused to see some of the more practical local parents knocking a whole two weeks effort off with a glass jar for 'elf isolation'.

PizzaForOne · 01/12/2020 17:21

i h8 elves

MrsTNightingale · 01/12/2020 17:24

Haven't RTFT but I've told my daughter that we don't subscribe to fae propaganda in this house and instead of inviting the evil little buggers in, we'll be salting the thresholds!

Elfieishere · 01/12/2020 17:25

@Mucky1

Our elves arrived today! My daughter was so excited for them coming I arranged this for today. She's been cooped up for a fortnight whilst my DH and I battled through covid and she's been amazing! This will probably be the last year I will have with this kind of thing and after this crappy year I'm going all out! As they say OP you do you!!
Love it! I think this will be the last year for my DD so I’m going all out also!
Gancanny · 01/12/2020 17:29

In the north the elves wear flat caps and arrive on a greyhound, no poncy balloons up here thank you very much. Arriving on a homing pigeon is occasionally done if we want to really go to town.

And if he wants to bring gifts he has to get down't pit and earn the money for them first.

CounsellorTroi · 01/12/2020 17:32

An elf attended our works Christmas do a couple of years back. Cue many photos of it with its arms around a wine glass, perusing the menu etc. Yawn.

PrincessNutNut · 01/12/2020 17:35

@RedToothBrush

Well because you can explain to a 4 or 5 year old that they cant have an expensive day out because mummy and daddy have to save their money for bills, but you can't exactly explain that the magic elf doesn't bother coming to them in a daft balloon unless you make up some kind of elf admin fee or just tell them Christmas is all a swizz.

Quite.

Magical elf is not so magical if you have to spend £££ on it.

Goodness, you have to spend money to make stuff happen at Christmas? I never realised that until the elf showed up.

As has been asked already...why do these anti-consumerist statements, or handwringing about the kids who don't get it, never apply to expensive tech or foreign holidays or other things the middle classes like?

SleepingStandingUp · 01/12/2020 17:36

[quote EggBobbin]@SleepingStandingUp we MC types call that a bug hotel or wildlife area Wink[/quote]
The Middle Classes burn wildlife and animals??? You degenerates
And you think my kid is the one going to lead yours astray eh??

SleepingStandingUp · 01/12/2020 17:37

@MrsTNightingale

Haven't RTFT but I've told my daughter that we don't subscribe to fae propaganda in this house and instead of inviting the evil little buggers in, we'll be salting the thresholds!
On the other hand, if one crept in early, your now trapped in with our
RedToothBrush · 01/12/2020 17:38

I don't get the school trying to flog holidays and expensive bikes to my 5 year old. Unlike elf cctv experiences.

SleepingStandingUp · 01/12/2020 17:39

As has been asked already...why do these anti-consumerist statements, or handwringing about the kids who don't get it, never apply to expensive tech or foreign holidays or other things the middle classes like? Because I don't pay my taxes for those working class benefit scroungers to have FUN at Christmas??

haircutsRus · 01/12/2020 17:39

@TheKeatingFive

It really has got absurdly out of hand now, hasn't it? Whatever happened to making paper chains and wonky cut-out snowflakes, or dabbing pine cones with glue and sprinkling on some glitter?

Times like this and I wonder what MN would have been like in the 1840s.

Has anyone seen those tacky Christmas trees people have started to put up. Awful German import. Now what’s wrong with a nice log and a bit of holly?

In those days people knew what Christmas was actually for.

As it happens, I still don't like seeing living trees cut down so people can spend weeks watching them die, but hey ho.

TheKeatingFive · 01/12/2020 17:42

In those days people knew what Christmas was actually for.

Having nice times with their loved ones?

I don’t think that’s changed.

Or been radically undermined by soft toy antics.

TheKeatingFive · 01/12/2020 17:43

I don't get the school trying to flog holidays and expensive bikes to my 5 year old. Unlike elf cctv experiences.

The schools not ‘flogging’ anything though.

And literally no one I know does elf surveillance.

juniperandrage · 01/12/2020 17:45

@MrsTNightingale

Haven't RTFT but I've told my daughter that we don't subscribe to fae propaganda in this house and instead of inviting the evil little buggers in, we'll be salting the thresholds!
Too right! Capricious little fuckers (As an aside, someone round here was making fairy doors with horseshoes, I didn't know whether to be offended on behalf of the fae or cry with laughter!)
nokidshere · 01/12/2020 17:56

Not all competitive, but some puzzlement as to why some households had an elf and not others. They are all pretty excited already though!

Most of the teachers I know are pretty adept at explaining why some people do or believe xyz and others don't. I'm pretty sure they can manage it with elves Grin