AIBU being unable to think of a present I actually need/ want?

[7strees]

DP has asked me to pick a Christmas present, value c. £60-70. He wants to get me something to keep, not something disposable or for the house. I am really struggling. He's getting something along those lines, think fancy pen.

However I already have nice pens, tech stuff (although that doesn't really fit the brief) and I am at a loss. I did suggest jewellery but he refused as I am too fussy and won't like anything he picks.

I absolutely have to come up with something and am totally out of ideas...

I don't mean this insensitively btw, I know some people are struggling to afford anything this Christmas, we are lucky in that I am working and DP has been able to rely on business savings to keep afloat (as he isn't eligible for furlough or other payments).

I have a bath with jets etc built in
I don't drink much tea or coffee or alcohol. I bought myself some nice sunglasses last year as a birthday present to myself and got nice headphones last Christmas. I don't have any hobbies other than running/ gym and looking at houses I can't afford on Rightmove! I do need new trainers but I'd prefer to buy them myself as my size varies between brands.

I sound so difficult I know. I'm frustrated with myself.

😂
You are indeed not easy to buy for

How about winter kit? Like nice gloves, hat or headband. It feels like it will be cold winter.

For running I mean

How about a session with a running coach? To improve technique? The results will stay with you!

The artist you mentioned does limited edition prints which are only a smidge above budget. samtoft.co.uk/products/all-i-need-is-you-and-you

why don't you say you'd like to go for a day out to get the trainers? You can pick the ones that fit, he can pay, you can even have a nice meal out together. Win, win? If you go before Christmas he can wrap them up for you, if you can't fit it in he can do you an IOU and it's something to look forward to in January.

Or a spare pair of wireless headphones (I always have a few on the go as mine lose battery just when I need them), or upgrade to a better fitbit for the gym?

Or, is there anything you want to do, rather than buy? Spa day, make up session, hair cut, nat trust membership (you can run there), tickets to a show or comedy gig or music event? Personal trainer sesh? Entry to a race for next year?

Depending where you are, you could get a month of MMA classes😁

I never understood how you could not want or need anything. Are you that rich you got absolutely everything?!

This year he's asked for something that's to keep, and to get something similar for me.

That’s unfair of him. What if you don’t want something to keep? Link him the trainers you want or your perfume, you’d use them constantly so either would be a fabulous gift.

are you into crafts? Or interested? There are some good kits and on line courses out there. Into flowers? Subscription deliveries for a few months? Or other subscriptions like foodie things?
Think about experiences rather than objects....

I .on the same boat @7strees dp has told me tontell him what I want but there genuinely isn't anything. I love him and honestly a day together would be fine. I've tried to explain to him that I'd rather nothing on the fay and we worry about it after when there isnsomething I want or need and he has basically called me a bitch.

Good luck finding ideas!

How about a soft leather purse? That would last years

Thanks all.

Arguably he could get me a ring, we've been together for a good few years now. But I'm not going to pull at that particular thread

I'm not rich, I have a nice enough life but I'm not rolling in it - I drive a 12 year old very functional car, cut and colour my own hair, buy my clothes in Primark etc. I'm also in my 40s so I have a lot of things already acquired over the years. I'm not used to getting gifts as I've always bought things myself or done without. I never really got presents til I met DP, and for years we've tended to buy each other useful presents (tech/DIY) kitchen gadgets) or trips away and meals out.

Anyway i think I'm going to suggest some gym/ running kit or trainers, but if he still wants to buy something to keep, then I'll ask for a print.

Oh, or my favourite perfume if he'd prefer to buy that than trainers or running clothes.

Annoyingly whilst I've been racking my brains for things for me, I found another couple of present ideas for DP. Typical!

The last couple of years I've asked for stuff I need that I just don't buy myself, helpful stuff that isn't particularly expensive but this year I've asked for clothes to work from home and said I'd absolutely love it if he sorted my old phone and managed to get the photos off into an album - that would make my year!!!
Maybe I'm just lazy !

Some nice food from Fortnum and mason like their biscuits or chocolates.

A couple of years ago I got a blanket printed with family photos on it from a company called Bags of Love, it's absolutely gorgeous and is my go to comfort when im feeling under the weather as its covered in happy memories. My family loved it so much I made one for my gran in a nursing home and everyone comments on it, its so nice.
From memory this was in your price range and is a lovely thing to keep

I had the same problem but I follow an actor on Instagram who also does Photography. He has taken some beautiful photos of the part of Scotland my Mum and I were born, although I left as a baby, so DH has bought me a print of the beach next to Granny's house. Would never had bought one myself and can't wait to see it (its arrived but DH had it sent to DDIL so I couldn't peek. Plus they are having it framed as my present.

For running, do you listen to music when you run? Aftershokz headphones are great as they use bone conduction tech to play into your cheekbones and keep your ears clear so you can still hear other stuff that may be a risk to you whilst you are out(cars, motorbikes, other people etc).

These are honestly the best things my DH bought me. I get lost in the zone so am a liability to myself when running near traffic.

A basic set up is about 80 quid.

He sounds a delight - getting angry because you can't choose your own gift

He wants to put a bit of effort in himself

My DH is also shit at this so I'm feeling for you not criticising

I've suggested a range of options he picks from - and even this seems to be stressing him FFS

I've suggested

Alexa for the car
Wireless earbuds
Portable Bluetooth speaker for garden
Snazzy leather trainers
Kit Heath necklace
An armchair

Ranging in price from £50-500. I'd be happy with any of them.

A set of pastel crayons and paper - try drawing pictures
www.pinterest.com/pin/569705421594337086/

A rose - David Austen sell bare root ones to plant any time unless the ground is frozen. You will need a reasonably sunny spot. Look forward to seeing it in the summer.
You can select perfumed or by colour or rambling or if you have no space a patio rose for a tub.

If your children are buying a cashmere scarf then why not ask for a cashmere gloves and socks - they won’t need to be tended carefully. I think it’s sad that your dh has asked for a gift and wants you to do the same and if you are not able to, there will be annoyance and a row instead of understanding from him.

If anyone wants some ideas, here are some of the more expensive presents I'm gifting this year -

A fruit tree/David Austin Rose
Lavazza milk frother
Hotel chocolate 'velvetiser' (a machine to make perfect home hot chocs)
Boze headphones
Trail-running-race entry fee

Or, what about a paragliding/ hurdygurdy/ pottery/ horse-riding lesson?