To let the dog sleep on my bed?

[QuentinWinters]

I have a velcro dog who often barks/whines at night. He's better if he has an item of my clothing nearby which makes me think he might better sleeping on my bed. Am I stupid to consider this?
Yabu - no way, very bad plan
Yanbu - love dogs on the bed

It’s up to you, but once you allow it it is difficult to stop.

I have 4 dogs, a tiny one, two small and a giant. They ask sleep in my bedroom and often in my bed. I shower every morning . Change the bedding frequently. It does help that my 3 of dogs are hairless though. The biggest spends more time on the floor than the bed but does enjoy the odd cuddle with us.

Your dog , your bed , do what you want .

Hard to say as you could be exacerbating the issue. My dog sleeps in his bed in our bedroom, but would be equally happy sleeping on his own in the living room so we wouldn't have the same issue with whining as you do. I mostly have him in our room because otherwise I end up missing him 😂

I have a big dog, and his bed smells after a week. I'd hate that to be in my bed.

With a tiny, non-smelly dog, I'd maybe allow it.

I adore the dog on our bed- I’m not well today and she’s lying across me as I type! For me it would depend on how large they are etc and how you feel about it personally . For me it’s so much happier and DDog sleeps with me or the DC and it’s much nicer for her too as she’s the only dog so otherwise would be on her own downstairs

Ours is small and not smelly and doesn’t snore so there are many factors to consider here ! She is also last to get up as not keen on mornings so never disturbs me

Once they're on, they're on. My dog is 9 now and I've always let him sleep on my bed but I did briefly try to get him off the bed when my son arrived but it didn't work.

To be honest I'm fine with it. Sheets washed more often, less space for me (he's a huge dog) but he's comfy and as far as I'm concerned he can sleep wherever he's happiest for his little life

Completely up to you - some people do and I can see why, some people don't and I can see why. I have a farm/pet dog that is often stinky, muddy and wet and no way on God's green earth is it allowed anywhere near my bed. Or upstairs for that matter. I often tell him that he's lucky that we even let him in the house!

I have a big dog, and his bed smells after a week. I'd hate that to be in my bed.
Ha! He does smell but as he loves lying on my coat/cardigans etc i usually smell of dog anyway!

You say 'my bed' - are you single? If so, are you planning to enter a relationship again ever?

I can imagine having a dog sleep on your bed might be a barrier to romance!

It’s up to you. I personally wouldn’t though, and wouldn’t want to share a bed with someone who allowed it.

Also worth bearing in mind that you could be creating bad habits. If he wines and you give into him he has learned that wining gets him attention. My dog has recently started doing this. Barking if I’m not in the room. Because he’s not a barker generally I have gone in and given him lots of attention because “he obviously just wants to be with his humans.” The upshot has been that he has started barking more as he learned that if he barks then he gets my attention. Now if he barks when I’m busy I ignore him. If I go into the lounge and he’s not barked to get me there he gets lots of attention. If he’s been barking he doesn’t get attention other than me assuming he wants to go out and me opening the door for him.

With my behaviour consultant hat on..

Yes.

If you can sleep with the dog there. If the dog has no issues with being woken suddenly then yes, provide your dog what they need to avoid distress.

Btw its total bollocks that if you let them sleep there you'll never get them out again, but you do have to train, desensitize etc etc and if your dog is anxious alone then it won't just go away by ignoring it, nor will it go away by causing your dog to put up with it and experience that distress.

If your dog is not pleasant to co-sleep with, work towards them sleeping in their own bed in your room, ideally a raised bed with lots of comfy stuff on it, but see what your dog likes.

I bed share with FOUR dogs and my OH and they can be asked to gerroff and sleep on the floor if necessary and sometimes choose to do so anyway.

There's nothing wrong with a dog in the bed providing the person or people in the bed don't mind. I find it difficult to sleep with a dog in my bed, even though I once found the idea of a dog in the bed cosy.

If you regularly share the bed with another person, I'd get their opinion. It might cause problems if you meet someone and want to share a bed after you've established the routine of the dog in the bed. Otherwise, it's no-one's business but your own!

I'm not single, stay with long term DP halft the week, dog comes too. DP says dog isn't allowed on his bed but also is the one who ends up with dog on his lap and let's him into the bedroom for morning cuddles when I don't. So go figure

I don't currently have any pet s but a NO from me.

Animals don't belong on human beds. I like my bed to smell fresh and clean. Not if dog.

If I didn't have a large dh my ddogs would be on the bed.
As it is they are allowed on when I get dressed /tidy the room or am upstairs busy...

Also worth bearing in mind that you could be creating bad habits. If he wines and you give into him he has learned that wining gets him attention.
I think this could be the problem. He never barked at night til a few weeks ago when he had diarrhoea,now its like he just wants me to say hello so barks every few hours and won't stop until I go down. Its very tiring

santa 😍

I've slept in the spare room for over a year because my H likes to have the dog on the bed and I'd prefer not to. When I complained he told me to go and sleep in the spare room if I didn't like it, so I did and I've never gone back.

I'm happily single and my Westie spoons me every night! I always have a window open whatever the weather and change my bed often He's my hot water bottle

My dog when she came to us first had severe separation anxiety- she was a rescue. So she slept on my bed- however a few months in she decided not to herself off her own bat. She is a big dog (swiss shephard) and I think she was overheating. She now prefers to sleep next to my bed on the floor- ignoring her lovely expensive dog bed.

Honestly I dont miss the smelly sheets and dog hairs!

YANBU but in terms of bad habits developing I think it depends on the dog.

Our is allowed to sleep on the bed and goes through phases of sleeping in our bed, his bed, the sofa etc. However he always gets off if told to and will sleep in his own bed if told to.

It is cute though...

I also have a Velcro dog. He sleeps at the bottom of our bed and I wouldn't have it any other way.
My favourite things is if I have a lazy Sunday and lay in bed watching films with my dog, all snuggled and cosy