To ask what the position is with taking babies home from hospital?

[scoopingthewater]

Do you need a car seat? What if you don’t drive?

@scoopingthewater

Oh I’m sure they could afford one but why would you spend money on something you don’t need? That seems silly to me.

Because as many people have said, it's not just the trip from the hospital when you might need to use the car seat.

For example DS failed his hearing test so we had to return less than a week later to have it redone at the hospital. So in less than a week we had already used the car seat more than once. There's loads of reasons why having your own car seat would be useful.

Although the hospital can’t prevent you from leaving with your baby without a car seat they do have a duty of care to safeguard the baby so would probably ask questions about how you were planning to get home if you didn’t have one.

The hospital I work at doesn’t have car seats to loan but children’s services could probably arrange something as a last resort.

We do occasionally get women who live locally and take their babies home in a pram instead and I remember once a dad pushed the baby home in a pram while mum got a taxi because she couldn’t walk far but generally even if they don’t have a car and are planning a lift/taxi parents would have a borrowed car seat.

You’re being very spiky op

@Regularsizedrudy

You’re being very spiky op

Because people are pulling silly faces and getting arsey about a straightforward question!

@Regularsizedrudy

You’re being very spiky op

Agree. OP is being quite defensive

I’m sure lots of stuff is useful but it doesn’t mean the world ends if you don’t have it for whatever reason. In any event it was a largely hypothetical question and I certainly didn’t want the thread to turn into an attack on those without much money, hence why I’m being ‘spiky.’

We wanted to leave ours in the car and carry him down to it - we don't have isofix so we'd got them to fit at the shop because we were a bit nervous about putting it in wrong - but they said DH had to go get it (incidentally, he then put it back in incorrectly because he was flustered so what this actually achieved was making DS unsafe when he otherwise wouldn't have been). I'm absolutely certain that they had no right to actually insist but it didn't feel worth arguing the point - we just wanted to get home

That was ridiculous of the staff! I have encountered this many times and generally what we do is push baby down to the door in the cot, then parents put baby into the car seat. Obviously the car is parked in the pick up area. Shame the staff made you go to all that trouble, I would have been really annoyed in your shoes. Lots of car seats are not infant carriers and have to be left in the car so I am surprised they weren't used to this situation!

Feel free to post elsewhere twiz.

I don’t think I’ve stopped you.

@scoopingthewater

So every mother who gives birth lives with someone who has a car? No one takes the bus or walks anywhere?

Is this your first baby OP? You are absolutely not going to want to take a bus (especially during a pandemic!!) or walk home after labour. If you don't drive, please arrange for a taxi or someone to pick you up. And yes, you'll need a car seat, even if it's borrowed for the trip.

Obviously you don't need a car seat if you aren't planning to take your baby in a car. And obviously the hospital has no legal right to try and kidnap your baby and try to prevent you leaving if you don't have one.

@scoopingthewater

I’m sure lots of stuff is useful but it doesn’t mean the world ends if you don’t have it for whatever reason. In any event it was a largely hypothetical question and I certainly didn’t want the thread to turn into an attack on those without much money, hence why I’m being ‘spiky.’

A car seat isn't just 'useful' though, it is essential for any baby who might travel in a car. Most families at least have a hand-me-down seat at the ready for emergencies. If you are certain a baby will never need to travel by car (eg living in a city centre) then of course you don't need one.

(Again, when I say 'most', I am referring to the area that I work in!)

You are not in the legal care of the hospital when you give birth they can't "not let you leave without a car seat". You can discharge yourself and your baby whenever you like.

My friend (who did drive and have a car) lived next to the hospital so walked home, popped baby in a sling and off they went.

But you might not be travelling in a car private

Anyway we are going around in circles here and it is pointless. Question was can hospitals stop you leaving without a car seat. Answer is no they cannot but some posters feel this is ill advised and some posters feel those without car seats, even if they also don’t have a car, should return the baby to Durex. All is well in mn land.

I’ve heard the thing about not being ‘allowed’ to go home without a car seat even if you’re walking home but always wondered if it was a bit of myth?

Surely once your care is over and you’re leaving the ward it’s up to you how you’re getting home with your own baby.

Obviously you shouldn’t go via car without a car seat but that’s illegal.

@PrivateD00r reading this thread I've realised that the problem was probably that they also had a rule that a member of staff had to come too if we didn't bring the car seat up, and they were desperately short-staffed and very stressed about it, so actually I'm now more understanding - at the time I thought it was bonkers!

With both mine I walked out with babe in arms.

One was going home in a car, one we took a taxi (City - so 20 minute walk, 5 minute taxi. We took the decision that it was safer to just all get in the taxi, even without a carseat which was legal where we were, than have me in a taxi and DP walk home. Others may risk asses differently).

I wouldn't have had any truck with them trying to stop me leaving. It's a baby, not a prisoner.

[quote Mumdiva99]@scoopingthewater have you had a baby before? I walk loads, and walked right up to the day of giving birth....I would not have walked home from hospital.
After baby 1 I had had a CS and struggled to walk to the hospital door.
After baby 2 and 3 I had just passed a baby through my vagina and had stitches and it was sore. I wasn't walking home. No way.
I think most people feel like this. You also have bags to carry. Plus the baby is tiny and may need a feed or a change shortly.....for most people they just want to get home.[/quote]
Everyone is different though

With DC1 I had to have surgery after a vaginal birth and by the time I was discharged on day 5, I can only describe how I moved as a very steady shuffle. Took forever to get out of hospital, and when we got home I didn't (couldn't) move from the bed for another 5 days.

With DC2, vaginal birth, very quick, no stitches and a few hours after birth I was practically high kicking my way out the hospital and could probably have attended a Zumba class that night 😂

You are not in the legal care of the hospital when you give birth they can't "not let you leave without a car seat". You can discharge yourself and your baby whenever you like.

Yes, this. I hear so many women say things like ‘well everything was fine but when it’s your first baby you’re not allowed to go home until the next day’ You can’t not be ‘allowed’ to leave and certainly I can’t see how they can dictate how you get your own baby home once you’re done with the service they’ve provided.

@YukoandHiro

My hospital you needed a car seat even if getting a taxi. And in the pandemic they wouldn't let you go just with a pram onto the bus (London). So definitely check.

Woman in next cubicle to me was on the phone trying to organise borrowing one, so worth getting organised in advance

They shouldn't be keeping healthy women and babies in hospital when they have a pram and plan to take the bus!

Legally you can take your baby home unless there's a court order preventing it. Hospital staff can't stop you.

However, if they think you are going to do something illegal or that will endanger the baby, they can call the police.

But actually if there is a medical emergency getting a small baby to hospital is essential and therefore if going in a friends car or a mini cab will need a car seat.

Therefore having a car seat is very sensible

@scoopingthewater

But you might not be travelling in a car private

Anyway we are going around in circles here and it is pointless. Question was can hospitals stop you leaving without a car seat. Answer is no they cannot but some posters feel this is ill advised and some posters feel those without car seats, even if they also don’t have a car, should return the baby to Durex. All is well in mn land.

I think you need to read my very first line again????

No one takes the bus or walks anywhere?

I had very quick straight forward births but I can't say I'd want to walk home! I went for a walk 2 days after having DS2 (no stitches etc) and felt awful where my stomach was almost "pulled" and achy from its emptiness, made me feel quite faint (I suffered terribly with after pains even after my first which might be a reason). Every woman is different of course but I'd recommend a taxi over a walk/bus if you can!

[quote Hardbackwriter]@PrivateD00r reading this thread I've realised that the problem was probably that they also had a rule that a member of staff had to come too if we didn't bring the car seat up, and they were desperately short-staffed and very stressed about it, so actually I'm now more understanding - at the time I thought it was bonkers![/quote]
Ahh fair enough. We do have to send a member of staff, but only because we need to bring the cot back up, I promise we aren't spying on you! We are really strict about babies not being carried in anyone's arms due to theoretical risk of slipping - floors are constantly wet. Though if that is really true, surely all women should be offered to leave in a wheelchair - imagine falling after just giving birth! Anyway, I am going well off topic!

I couldn't have walked or got the bus after my section. We don't have a car but bought a car seat for a taxi. We used it a fair bit then gifted to my nephew so I think it's been well used.