AIBU to ask how much you save for your kids over the year compared to what you spend at Christmas

[GordonsAliveAndEatsPies]

This has been triggered by the "what do you spend on your kids at Christmas" thread, because looking at the figures I would say we spend less than the top figures on each DC but definitely save quite a lot more "on behalf" of each child when you add up pensions, Isa's and pocket money.

I am just wondering if we are unusual in our thinking? Is it about putting money in their names (which I certainly understand is something we will have to cross when time comes) or is it something else?

BTW I am aware this is a sensitive subject and we are lucky we can do this and it's certainly not meant to be goady.

The whole inheritance issue I have is that if I live with to 85 years old
My ds will be 70 and daughter 65 before they get anything 🤣🤣🤣
So I do focus on saving for them for a more appropriate age !

Whattheactual20201
that makes sense. My DD will inherit hers at 25 so I don''t have that to worry about

We have spent around £300 per child (currently 5 and 2). Over the course of the year we've put considerably more into savings for them. Plus all the cash they get for Christmas gets put away too.

We save £100/mth into their CTF/ISA that they have control of at 18. We have saved other money for them but it isn't in their name and they know nothing of it.

First couple of Christmases spent nothing/very little (as enough gifts from others/didn't need anything) and then approx £75-£150 at whilst still pre-school/KS1. Probably £200 at KS2 and then in the secondary years it is has been approx £300-£700 depending on what gadget was wanted (so I guess it averages at £500).

I think I would've still spent the above at Christmas (if I could afford it) even if I couldn't afford to save the £100/mth into savings for them. I'm fairly tight with pocket money and that had to be earned - there is also a clear expectation of a part-time job at 16.

mam what do you mean 'you aren't supposed to save the child benefit' - who says so? We've always put the CB into a pension fund for our DS ... I know there is the argument that if you can afford to do this you don't 'need' the CB but people spend their money differently.

Our family income is around £40k, as is my sibling's - he frequently tells me they can't save anything for their DC yet they have fashionable & designer clothes, exotic holidays, the latest toys/tech gadgets imaginable ... we prefer to be slightly more frugal and invest in our child's future. There's no 'right or wrong' but I don't think you can tell people how the CB should be spent.

We spend approx £100 per child at Christmas - we feel very fortunate to be able to do so living in the area we do. DS (7) gets £2 a week pocket money - he quite often saves this to buy himself something he fancies. Neither child has savings. Christ, we barely have savings. Child benefit goes on things like the cost of after school club or new clothes/shoes when they need them (alarmingly often, it feels).

@mam0918 I'm in Ireland where child benefit is 140 per month per child...yes I save it. It's not means tested here, my children's lives are "enriched" enough so I'm using it to enrich their future too if that's ok with you

another £3k goes into his pension from my parents.

What’s a kids pension?

I don't spend a fortune at Christmas and I don't squirrel away savings for them either. I keep my own healthy savings so we can avoid disaster in the case of the shit hitting the fan.

We put about £500 a month away in savings, but that’s just a general term. We have money saved for the children as such.

We spend about £200 per child - but a large portion is that is from the money we make selling the toys they don’t play with anymore.

We had a total clear out of our boys toys earlier this year, including the many toys stored in the loft and we made just under £700.

That has paid for our Christmas.

It was triggered by a thread where people are spending over £1,000 per DC on Christmas (so there must be some slack in the household budget) and I was wondering if I was alone in saving more over the year than I spend at Christmas. And I'm not. That's it really.

How old are your DC, OP? I think that makes a big difference to the spend, honestly.

Also, people categorise things differently. Some might buy a new bike for Christmas plus stockings and little presents - that will add up quick. I’ve never given bikes for Christmas as I see them as more of an “essential” spend in the way the car is. It’s family transport. Or a laptop for school - is that a family expense out of technology, like a new TV is, or is it part of the child’s Christmas present spending? Or clothes/shoes/etc. Or hobby equipment etc. So I could spend much less on a present “for Christmas” but if you add up overall what you spend sometimes you might be surprised - that £1,000 per child might be made up of clothes (that you’d need to buy anyway), things to extend their interests (that you’d buy anyway if you’ve signed them up to activities you support - sport, music, whatever), tech kit they need nowadays to participate in school and social life, and so on. So that’s where the ‘slack in the budget’ is - it’s just classed differently.

I buy clothes & shoes at Christmas, always some pyjamas, last year one DC had football boots as part of their gifts, another a phone we’d have needed to give soon anyway. I add boring stuff like batteries and Pritt-stick and pants to stockings- I’d buy all these anyway but if they get them on Christmas Day it’s fun to have stuff to unwrap alongside the more coveted stuff. The headline figure probably isn’t all plastic tat and whatever their DC desire, there’s probably more to it. Slack in the budget doesn’t necessarily equal money to save long-term.

(As an aside, I’m properly astonished by hue much people have in savings for their DC. I know I shouldn’t be - but I am!)

[quote GordonsAliveAndEatsPies]@snog yes we have since birth. We are lucky that our dd8 has about £40k so far and dd5 £28k across different investment vehicles. New one on the way so just getting ready to sort out a new stream for him too. But then my parents did the same for me and DS so it wouldn't have occured for us to do any different.

However, it's just so interesting to see people's mindsets as so many people seem to splash out for Christmas but you wonder if they would think about a long term savings plan. I even saw one thread where someone just wanted to know the going rate for pocket money and so many posters came back with none because "they don't need it" or "we spend enough".[/quote]
This is probably the single most depressing thing I have read for weeks. It makes me feel properly shit for my kids. They don't have any savings, they will likely not inherit anything and the christmas budget is very low and will go on stuff they actually need for the most part.

This is probably the single most depressing thing I have read for weeks. It makes me feel properly shit for my kids. They don't have any savings, they will likely not inherit anything and the christmas budget is very low and will go on stuff they actually need for the most part Please
Don't let it depress you there is more to life than money. I hope things improve financially, check local charities too. I was on my ass a few years ago, getting by now.
This type of threads blows my mind too it isn't normal to me.
I think MN should do a pass on thread not cash but things that would be enjoyed by another DC.
@NoSquirrels I like your honesty and self awareness you buy when needed instead of thinking "Well i only spend £10 at Christmas" ignoring free spending throughout the year.

We spend way more on Christmas than we put into the children's savings accounts.

That's not to say we won't be willing to help them out in the future but I don't want them growing up knowing they'll just get given a chunk of cash from us.

We save far more into savings/pensions for our D.C. than we spend at Christmas. Don’t agree with wasting loads of money on presents that get forgotten about after a few weeks. Looking long term is far more important.

@Whodofthunk

Don’t feel depressed. Anything you can save for them is a start. We started at £20 a month and have upped the amount as our debt disappeared and our incomes changed. Something is better than nothing- even if it is a pound a week. That’s 52 pounds a year. A whole £1,000 by the time they turn 18. More if you invest it.

£20 a month over 21 years is over £5,000. Which is a good start on a deposit for a house.

Also, it's very much not the norm for families to have saved tens of thousands of pounds for each individual child and have a pension scheme set up.

Those who are in a position to are fortunate to obviously.

But I don't like the implied sneeriness at people who spend what they can at Xmas but don't have long term saving plans for their children.

Not because they're not financially savvy, but just because they can't afford it.

I set aside 20 per week all year and use it for all Xmas gifts and the Xmas meal.

Well I usually do, the money was stolen this year so its been a real tight squeeze

@christinarossetti19

I don’t think it is sneeriness. It’s a window on what financial literacy looks like.

Now more than ever people need to know about good personal finance. COVID has been then nail in the coffin of casual spending for a lot of people. In the same way that the 2008 crash was the death knell for unregulated pay day loans being seen as acceptable.

I wish I had been more financially aware in my 20s. I wouldn’t have had to struggle so much in my 30s.

We save much much more than we spend on Christmas. We don't get child benefit. We are Christian, so we try to place focus on family, food and presents aren't opened until late afternoon (but DC are usually busy playing with family). We have a cap on spending for Christmas (around 15 per gift, 2 gifts each). We spend more for their birthdays as that's more special and also in the winter.

I spend far too much on Christmas food, games and activities though .

Most people can only save a little for there children.I don’t think that by giving your child a pension or huge lump sum of money is normal or good for child they need to lure to work and save.people who are saving for child’s uni want if they want to be a plumerias or hairdresser.people live in different worlds,this is the problem when they think is ok to give child vast amount of money.they will forever be running back to mummy and daddy for help.

We save more than we spend on Christmas presents.
We save £30 p/m per child so £360 each per year, which is what we can afford.
Christmas is variable depending on age and what is wanted / needed.... this year we’ve spent about £150 on dd who is 5, and about £50 on ds who is 18m.

Plumber

@happystone why would I choose to not save money just in case my DC wanted to be a hairdresser or plumber? It it sensible to save money for them, considering how if uni was their choice, we have to pay for it! I had to work during my A levels/uni, so I understand things from a less affluent perspective too.

@Itsnotalwaysme
I’m sorry to hear that. I hope you still have a lovely Christmas.
I save £40 a month for Christmas. The dc have no other savings. They’ll have to get jobs