to think the 'I've known someone for years and I've never seen them (insert behaviour) ' defence is a crap defence?

[chomalungma]

Because just because you know someone, it doesn't ever mean that you really know them.

Or have seen what goes on when they are with other people
Or behind closed doors.

It's been used for years to allow people to get away with all kinds of things. Some truly awful things.

If you are using that defence to allow someone to get away with something, then you need to think about how that makes the victims feel.

Sadly, I probably will.

I am in no way saying Amber heard deserved to be abused. No one does. and if she was then yes she deserves her day in court.

I also accept that abuse can affect seven those with bolahie aggressive p personality traita.and not every survivor is a shaking wreck. I also know some women or men find it hard to leave for various reasons

But something about this case doesn't smell right. am not sure why but it doesnt. UNless it's the case of newspapers distorting facts and we know that does happen

@TalkingToMyselfAndFeelingOld

Sadly, I probably will.

I am in no way saying Amber heard deserved to be abused. No one does. and if she was then yes she deserves her day in court.

I also accept that abuse can affect seven those with bolahie aggressive p personality traita.and not every survivor is a shaking wreck. I also know some women or men find it hard to leave for various reasons

But something about this case doesn't smell right. am not sure why but it doesnt. UNless it's the case of newspapers distorting facts and we know that does happen

Agree, never let the truth get in the way of a good story :(

I read some shocking things about Amber Heard and the way she treated her staff which led me to believe she is capable of abusive behaviour.

These celebrities who are legend in showbusiness and much loved by everyone are only human. I am sure lots of people have a story to tell about one or more of them which is not in keeping with the image they want to portray. I know I do

I admit that my views on domestic violence are a bit biased .growing up surrounded by it I felt ambivalent about the victims sometimes. If my mother had left my ister.Nd wouldn't hAve ended up damaged by what happened to us. All I feel sympAthy for DV survivors but also a bit like "why didn't you leave?" And I hAve read upon this topic and I know it isn't that simple. But a part of me just feels anger towards those who allow themselves and their kids to be lunchbox

I know am being VvVVVU!

twitter.com/uponnothing/status/1329920061272977413

Shipman example is interesting. Watching the documentary it is clear he was almost universally revered and respected by his patients as one of those doctors who goes over and above, and really did know exactly how to relate to people who were frightened, ill, or confused.

So yeah, I'd imagine had he been in court for a one-off, Harold Shipman would likely have been able to produce hundreds, if not thousands of these character witnesses to contend that they'd only ever seen good from him.

Doesn't mean they serve no purpose. Prosecutions will produce hostile witnesses to give negative accounts in order to corroborate behaviours, so on balance, it's only fair to permit defendants to produce their own friendly witnesses, even though in reality they are totally meaningless.

@XDownwiththissortofthingX

twitter.com/uponnothing/status/1329920061272977413

Shipman example is interesting. Watching the documentary it is clear he was almost universally revered and respected by his patients as one of those doctors who goes over and above, and really did know exactly how to relate to people who were frightened, ill, or confused.

So yeah, I'd imagine had he been in court for a one-off, Harold Shipman would likely have been able to produce hundreds, if not thousands of these character witnesses to contend that they'd only ever seen good from him.

Doesn't mean they serve no purpose. Prosecutions will produce hostile witnesses to give negative accounts in order to corroborate behaviours, so on balance, it's only fair to permit defendants to produce their own friendly witnesses, even though in reality they are totally meaningless.

I have read up on Shipman and seen several documentaries on him. I got the idea he was initially a good doctor and very caring, but he stepped over the mark when he helped the first patient to die.

I know.. in times gone by, the family doctor would do this for families when a person was dying and they would not stand by and prolong the agony. It was one of those unsaid things that people knew about. I know when I was a child I heard people say they asked the doctor to do something for the dying relative.

I am a catholic and remember the priest going on about 'euthanasia' and saying it was wrong. I had no idea what he meant, but I guess now it was about helping people to die.

Shipman got carried away - played 'God' with people's lives and probably did not know how to stop at the end.

Re: Shipman, did they ever find out what motiva ted.him??? Why just kill patients for the sake of it?.was it like Beverly allitt? for attention?

@TalkingToMyselfAndFeelingOld

Re: Shipman, did they ever find out what motiva ted.him??? Why just kill patients for the sake of it?.was it like Beverly allitt? for attention?

I think he started out trying to be kind, and then he began judging who should live and who should die plus he was killing people with no obvious relatives and they were leaving their estates to him.

He was playing God. He was deluded and dangerous

He was coercing folk into changing their wills to leave him parts of their estate. That wasn't what got him rumbled though, at least, it was only a small part of the entire jigsaw that eventually got him caught out.

I'm not certain it just started as typical doctor guided euthanasia either, because he murdered several people in their 40's who he'd been treating for a specific illness, but were nowhere near the end of their natural lives.

I suspect Shipman might have been an example of Munchhausen's by Proxy.

Or a 'God Complex' which is a load of personality traits all rolled into one.