Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To encourage hubby to be furloughed

59 replies

FurloughOrNo · 20/11/2020 09:15

After a 2 year struggle and mc earlier in the year and I am now 8 weeks pregnant Smile. However, I am really, really struggling with sickness/nausea/dizziness the lot! Dr has given meds which don’t appear to be helping and I am really no use to anyone, all I can do is lie in bed! Hubby has arranged to go in later to work this week so he can take DD to school and his parents will collect her after, they can do it for 1 week since FIL (he drives) has the week off. Hubby’s boss mentioned in passing that the company may need to furlough staff again and was he interested. I said to hubby that as long as it doesn’t ‘look bad’ (iyswim) on him then I think he should take it since they need to furlough staff anyway and it would solve the issue that we have now. Hubby is not too sure. AIBU to encourage him to take it?

OP posts:
Zoecarter · 20/11/2020 09:18

It would look bad at being the one wanting time off. If they need to let people go the ones jumping at the opportunity of furlow will be the ones to go.

SandysMam · 20/11/2020 09:18

Be careful, if he is furloughed they might decide he is not needed at all which may leave you with bigger problems! I hope the sickness eases soon, congratulations on your pregnancy!

Nottherealslimshady · 20/11/2020 09:19

If he'd said something like "whatever you need to do, I'm fine with that if it helps." Then it would probably have looked pretty good for him.

But if there's people being furloughed then it makes sense for it to be the people that have other responsibilities at home, for the company aswell.

They're alright your husband refusing furlough, then in 2 weeks you're worse and he has to take time off. That will look bad on him.

PrincessGraceless · 20/11/2020 09:23

If he hasn’t been furloughed before, I’m not sure he’ll qualify, unless the rules have changed.

Whammyyammy · 20/11/2020 09:32

I'd be cautious, if cuts need to be made, bring on furlough is an indication to the boss that he managed without yiur oh.

SandrasAnnoyingFriend · 20/11/2020 09:36

I'd only do it if absolutely necessary. I've just remortgaged and they ask a lot about whether you've been furloughed in the application process. It may well count against you financially even if he gets his role back.

Newuser991 · 20/11/2020 09:39

I've never been furloughed since this all started.

My friend in the same profession but different area of expertise has been furloughed since March and has now been told redundancy is on the cards.

Pregnancy is temporary and what would have happened if the pandemic and furlough had never occurred? You'd have to make it work.

I wouldn't want furlough as if they can do without you temporarily then they can do without you permanently in some cases

LemonsYellow · 20/11/2020 09:41

I would be very cautious.

Carrotcakey · 20/11/2020 09:43

If furlough wasn’t a thing then what would you do?

I’ve been there but sorry you just have to get through it. Don’t risk his job.

Cheeseboardandmincepies · 20/11/2020 09:45

You’d have to get on with it if furlough wasn’t a thing. I think YABU, if they work out they can do without him temporarily then he’ll be the first out.
Just need to get on with it, pregnancy isn’t a illness after all.

Bluntness100 · 20/11/2020 09:46

I would not be offering for this no. Because if it comes to redundancies then they may consider him not necessary. Or particularly willing to work if he puts his hand up so easily.

jacks11 · 20/11/2020 09:47

Agree that with things as they stand, being on furlough may put you in a vulnerable position. Not sure I’d voluntarily take that risk at this juncture. Especially not for this reason- what would you have done if furlough not a possibility?

I am concerned at the number of people viewing furlough as a paid jolly.

Bluntness100 · 20/11/2020 09:48

Also do you work op? Is your job secure and you can carry the financial load alone? Or is he the only breadwinner and you need his salary? If it’s the latter I would be urging him to stay in employment

An employer furloughing at this stage could indicate very strongly redundancy is looming.

Boulshired · 20/11/2020 09:52

Those who I know who have been made redundant unfortunately were the one on furlough. I know in DPs company not only did they furlough those who they believed were less vital, those who stayed have worked above and beyond to avoid redundancy. Redundancy came and those on furlough have made up the numbers.

triceratops12 · 20/11/2020 09:55

I really wouldn't go on furlough unless I was absolutely forced to. Your sickness and feeling ill will pass, his job will probably go with it.

Pumkinseed · 20/11/2020 09:57

I think you are being very naive. Those on furlough will be the first in line to be made redundant. With a baby on the way I think this is incredibly short sighted.

Martinisarebetterdirty · 20/11/2020 09:58

In this economic climate I’m surprised anyone would actively seek to be on furlough. How old is your daughter - is there any after school provision you can use or anyone else to drop her home?
Go back to your doctor for better meds and advice. You should not take furlough unless there is absolutely no choice in it.

AuditAngel · 20/11/2020 10:03

Does you DD have a close friend at school? Could you ask the parent to drop her home to you next week onwards when FIL can’t help? I would do this for a friend. Kids are in a bubble anyway.

Not ideal, but she could have a sandwich when she gets in (made by DH in morning and left in fridge) and he can do bath and bed for her later. When it’s just the two of you, put the kids tv on,

ivfbeenbusy · 20/11/2020 10:07

I wouldn't personally - everyone I know who was made redundant from various different jobs/companies/sectors was from the furloughed pool of employees (even though companies said furlough wouldn't make you more vulnerable it blatantly does)

Newuser991 · 20/11/2020 10:08

Id watch WFH too.

Our admin and secretaries who cannot work effectively from home without access to office equipment and therefore are allowed to come in and most are refusing. Many are in their 20s with no health issues.

Only a very select few are coming in and the rest are sitting at home on laptops doing nothing until a collating job comes in etc.

Make no mistake it is being noticed who is willing to come in and get on with it and who is not.

If redundancies are to be made they will look first at the admin staff who sat at home.

Do not risk anyone's job in this climate

ZoeTurtle · 20/11/2020 10:09

I wouldn't. Most of the people who were furloughed in my company were later made redundant, and I've heard many similar stories. You don't want the company to realise they can do without him.

ChronicallyCurious · 20/11/2020 10:53

I would be very careful, everyone I know who has lost their job was on voluntary furlough. My boyfriend is currently on furlough but that is because his entire company is, he was offered it a few weeks before lockdown but we decided it’s not worth the risk to choose to go on it and we waited until it was forced by the company.

It would be nice to have him home but awful if he lost his job.

DianaT1969 · 20/11/2020 11:37

You don't mention your job and being on sick leave. If he's the only wage earner, in your position not only would I encourage him to continue working and show enthusiasm for the job, but I'd be looking for a part-time job myself while in early stage of pregnancy. The recruitment process takes a while and hopefully you'll be feeling better soon.
His company furloughing additional people now doesn't bode well, unless it is a sector that is traditionally quiet around Christmas, or has been impacted by the recent lockdown and will bounce back immediately afterwards.

Pumkinseed · 20/11/2020 11:59

Are you on sick leave OP? Or are you a Sahm?

Graffitiqueen · 20/11/2020 12:04

I would do anything to avoid being furloughed. They might not take the staff back afterwards!