To encourage hubby to be furloughed

[FurloughOrNo]

After a 2 year struggle and mc earlier in the year and I am now 8 weeks pregnant . However, I am really, really struggling with sickness/nausea/dizziness the lot! Dr has given meds which don’t appear to be helping and I am really no use to anyone, all I can do is lie in bed! Hubby has arranged to go in later to work this week so he can take DD to school and his parents will collect her after, they can do it for 1 week since FIL (he drives) has the week off. Hubby’s boss mentioned in passing that the company may need to furlough staff again and was he interested. I said to hubby that as long as it doesn’t ‘look bad’ (iyswim) on him then I think he should take it since they need to furlough staff anyway and it would solve the issue that we have now. Hubby is not too sure. AIBU to encourage him to take it?

Definitely NOT.

The industry my DH is in have already said (on the QT, they'd never admit it) that those being considered for redundancy should it need to happen are those who have asked to be furloughed.

DH has never been furloughed and worked all the way through, plus the job he does cannot be easily replaced.

I think you would be very foolish to suggest this now.

Unless you have a really secure job yourself, I wouldn't.

I also meant to say "out of sight out of mind"

Better that he shows up every day and proves his value.

I wouldn't either

God no, don't get him furloughed because you feel sick today, you might be fine tomorrow. Life goes on.

I really wouldn't encourage it.

In DH's work, the ones who asked to be, or jumped at the opportunity to be furloughed, are the ones that are least effective and productive at work i.e. workshy, under normal circumstances anyway.

Their being off and their workload being picked up by colleagues has highlighted just how little they would be missed.

His work are not topping up their salary, but they have indicated that the 20% they may have topped up will be going to those who have worked through, in the form of bonus or 'gift', they're just finding a workaround so that those who are off can't have a claim for "boohoo why didn't we get a bonus either?".

And if redundancies are to be made, work will find a way to make sure they are the ones to go.

Is flexi-furlough an option - effectively working part time - a friend has dropped down to three (short I think) so maybe 50% of his full time hours.

I've not looked into the financial side for the employer or employee, but I can see benefits on both sides in terms of retaining staff, and for the furloughed staff members not being out on a limb if there is permanent downsizing later on.

No, I wouldn’t risk his job. Those on furlough are more likely to be made redundant, if only because those in the office will be seen as hardworking through a difficult time and thought of highly. What would you have done if there was no pandemic?

with a child and another one on the way, the very last thing I would want is my partner to be furloughed and his job at risk!

I'd rather the peace of mind that at least one of us is working and paying the bill, and I can spend most of my day in bed!

I would ask neighbours, friends, other parents to help with the pick up and drop off, and explain why.

MN posters hate anyone asking for favours, but in real life people are nice and when they know the reason why, much more likely to offer.

In our experience it was work from home, furlough then a few months later redundancy.

Can't your DD go to an afternoon club or childminder? The price would be less than the 20% cut in salary from furlough I imagine.

How old is DD? Plenty of y4/5/6 kids walk to school. Would she be old enough?

Congratulations on your pregnancy. And I'm sorry you're feeling so poorly.

I think your DH should consider furlough only as a last resort. We're facing a terrible time in the job market, and I think it would be wiser to keep his head below the parapet.

After this coming week, there are only 3 more weeks of term. Can you work out a plan for those 3 weeks? Ask for school friend favours. Look into after school club. See if you can manage to drag yourself out (I understand how hard that will be, I had awful sickness too). Any other friends or relatives that can do the school pick up? Have you been back to docs to ask about alternative meds?

@SandysMam

Be careful, if he is furloughed they might decide he is not needed at all which may leave you with bigger problems! I hope the sickness eases soon, congratulations on your pregnancy!

This sums it up why he should think twice !

@Pumkinseed

How old is DD? Plenty of y4/5/6 kids walk to school. Would she be old enough?

None of my local schools would accept anyone under Y6 to walk to and back from school. Written permission forms are only sent to Y6 parents, everyone else is expected to be picked up by the named adult.

Gosh I wouldn't recommend anyone looking too keen to be furloughed. This could back-fire badly on him, and there is no way it wouldn't 'look bad' as you've put it. It should be his bosses decision, it's not really fair that the boss asked your DH. On the other hand, I wonder why the boss asked your DH about it - is your DH seen an integral part of his team? If not then I guess he has bigger worries!

I wouldn’t be volunteering for furlough, especially if the company is at risk of redundancy. Our company offered furlough out and the people that jumped were also the ones who had to contend with redundancy

No! Its a very bad idea to volunteer to be furloughed.

None of my local schools would accept anyone under Y6 to walk to and back from school. Written permission forms are only sent to Y6 parents, everyone else is expected to be picked up by the named adult.

seriously? that is ridiculous. my DC has walked home (just under 1 mile) since y4 and lots of other children do it.

Our local schools are encouraging children from Y4 to walk home on their own, or walk to an agreed point to meet an adult, so as to avoid groups of parents at the school gate.

Right, that’s pretty much a no then! Thank you for the head wobble. DD is 4 and I don’t know any of the school mums so no one to help in that sense. I am currently WFH although on sick leave at present. When I was pg with DD I was off for 6 weeks in and out of hospital so anticipating this being the same since it’s hit me pretty hard. Will have to go back to the drawing board

Sorry OP, nausea is awful. Do you drive and do you think it's safe to drive? I'm thinking you could just give yourself extra time to get in and out of the car for pickup, and maybe ask the school if someone can walk your daughter to the car for a few weeks.

Would Ubers there and back be too expensive?

Imagine the pandemic never happened

What would you do?

Can your dh use leave?

No ones going on holiday any time soon

The ones on furlough will be the first out the door. If you have a baby on the way, that’s not what you need. Sickness is terrible in pregnancy I feel for you. I worked part time as a teacher in my last pregnancy (and had a toddler at home) and it was awful but I got through it, you can too.

If he tells his boss his wife is pregnant and struggling with illness, he might be offered furlough priority. It sounds like they have to furlough some people and don’t want to upset anyone (lots of people hate being furloughed because of the pay reduction and loss of routine/career development). His boss might be quite glad if some people are willing!