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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed with my cousin....

54 replies

TableFlowerss · 17/11/2020 21:46

So a cousin that I’ve not seen for about a year sends me a message out of the blue asking how I was etc...(She lives about 2 miles away)

Never messaged and I thought ‘that’s nice’, maybe she’s struggling with lockdown and I’d feeling lonely as she’s single. She said would Iike to FaceTime catch up as she’s started her own business and would like to show me it.

I did think there might be more to it as she seemed intent on pinning me down to a date for a FaceTime. (Again I never hear from her from one year to the next and she passes my house several times a month)

I was expecting her to show me a craft hobby she’d set up and I thought she probably wants me to buy some items.

I wasn’t overly keen as I felt it was a bit underhanded to pretend she wants to genuinely catch up with me, when the reality is she wants to sell me stuff.

I got it wrong though....

Yesterday she called with the how are you etc and then asked if I minded if her boss joins us on the FaceTime call - (at this point I’m like WTF)

Over a barrel I said ‘yes it’s ok’. So then ‘Sarah’ her boss appears and stated talking about the business. (I’m not naming it but it’s once if those pyramid types where you have to get people on board and then you get commission etc.... there’s loads of them!)

So I had to follow their internet link and hear her waffle on how amazing the business is, both the product/service and being an ‘employee’. Then they get to the end after about 20 mins and she says ‘so if you click on that link and we’ll get you signed up’

I was fuming. I feel that was so out of order of my cousin to be sly about it and pretend she wanted to chat. She just wanted to sign me up!!

As you can imagine, I was under pressure but I said no anyway because I was so mad that she’s put me in that situation.

I’ve got my own shit to deal with at the moment and Ive not got time for shit like that. It’s the underhanded aspect of if that I’m pissed off with!

OP posts:
Sparklesocks · 17/11/2020 21:47

Ugh what a pain. I would’ve hung up when I realised what she’d done - cousin or not!

It’s shitty to feign interest in someone solely to try and drag them into your MLM. I’d be fuming.

HapHap · 17/11/2020 21:48

That's awful. These schemes bring out the worst in people:(

romeolovedjulliet · 17/11/2020 21:48

cynic in me knew it was mlm by your 2nd paragraph. sorry !

TableFlowerss · 17/11/2020 21:48

To add- they wanted me to sign up as a representative and to switch myself to use their product/service. Angry

OP posts:
Spied · 17/11/2020 21:49

Cheeky f**kers. I'd be fuming.
Well done for saying no.

TableFlowerss · 17/11/2020 21:49

@romeolovedjulliet

cynic in me knew it was mlm by your 2nd paragraph. sorry !
What does mlm mean? Or am I being think?
OP posts:
ImaSababa · 17/11/2020 21:51

This is what MLMs do to people, almost exclusively women. They ruin relationships and isolate people.

GrandUnion · 17/11/2020 21:53

She’s clearly swallowed the MLM thing hook, line and sinker, but honestly, OP, you kind of went along with this by going along with the idea of a call about her ‘new business’ AND then agreeing to her boss coming on the call AND sitting through a 20-minute ad ! You must have known what was happening. That’s the time to be very firm about already having an actual job.

Brighterthansunflowers · 17/11/2020 21:53

Yeah when people you haven’t spoken to in years get in touch about a new business it’s usually MLM crap (multi level marketing aka pyramid scheme aka massive scam).

Why on earth did you agree to her boss joining you?

YANBU, just block her on social media until she realises what a scam she’s got inti

TableFlowerss · 17/11/2020 21:54

I’ve just googled mlm lol.

Had she been honest and said ‘look can I share it with you and if you don’t want to go ahead that’s cool and my boss will be there?’

I’d have said ok, but I very much doubt I’ll sign up.

OP posts:
CtrlU · 17/11/2020 21:55

I can’t believe you stayed on the line that long honestly.

Once she mentioned Sarah - I would have hung up.

romeolovedjulliet · 17/11/2020 21:56

multi level marketing, think pyramid selling basically = scams, being taken for a mug and over priced stuff.

ReneeRol · 17/11/2020 21:56

I clicked on YABU because you didn't hang up. Why waste your energy fuming when you're the one who sat there listening to it?

I don't understand why people would rather look polite and silently fume rather than click end call.... and go do something else.

Nottherealslimshady · 17/11/2020 21:56

I'd have outright said "oh you want money off me, sorry cousin I thought you just wanted a friendly catchup. Bye now." About 2 minutes in and hung up.
What a pisstake.

minou123 · 17/11/2020 21:57

This is a new low for MLM!

I honestly didn't think they could sink to this kind of manipulation, but how wrong.

Well done for saying no. The pressure from the two of them must have been quite intense. Like double glazing salesmen.

romeolovedjulliet · 17/11/2020 21:59

it was very fortunate her 'boss' is there with her when she facetimes you Hmm double whammy pressure tactics.

sapnupuas · 17/11/2020 22:00

Have you heard from her since?

TableFlowerss · 17/11/2020 22:00

@GrandUnion

She’s clearly swallowed the MLM thing hook, line and sinker, but honestly, OP, you kind of went along with this by going along with the idea of a call about her ‘new business’ AND then agreeing to her boss coming on the call AND sitting through a 20-minute ad ! You must have known what was happening. That’s the time to be very firm about already having an actual job.
You’re right but I’m very close to her mam and two sisters and I didn’t want to cause tension by saying no you can’t. They’re always so helpful and kind.

Had I known it was going to be this type of business I’d have said on no I’m not interested. I thought it would have been a craft thing- silly me

Believe me, had it been a random FB friend I’d have turned it off.

OP posts:
TableFlowerss · 17/11/2020 22:02

No funnily enough. She’s probably annoyed I said no

OP posts:
StillCoughingandLaughing · 18/11/2020 00:30

I’ve just had a row about this on Facebook. It never seems to occur to these people that if these products are that great and sell so well, they don’t need to persuade ten other people to sell them for them, taking a tiny commission from each. They could be selling them directly and keeping all the commission themselves.

byebyeboyee · 18/11/2020 01:17

Sounds like MLM they will probably contact you again, you need to be firm if she contacts you again be prepared for anger. I hope it's not MLM so many people lose money, they get more money by getting people to join then actually selling anything

grassisjeweled · 18/11/2020 01:20

Wrong on so many levels

YouokHun · 18/11/2020 01:42

So your cousin has been brainwashed she’s not the only one; so many people who are worried about employment have been tricked into MLM while their guard is down. They’re almost certain to lose money (c.99% of sign ups to MLM lose money, according to independent research).

Have a look on BBC iPlayer for the docu called The Secret of the Mutilevel Millionaires also have a read of the Elle Beau Blog, the articles on the Talented Ladies Club site and on a site That I run along with others www.mlmtruth.org

BananaPop2020 · 18/11/2020 01:46

I wouldn’t have entertained this from the second she mentioned a new business, particularly given the lack of previous contact.

Cordial11 · 18/11/2020 01:55

Ergh! They have no limits!!!!! Sad