Not to want to work Christmas?

[2bamum]

OK first I've name changed, second I'm going to change some of the facts slightly so please if I say 7 once then 8 don't be suspicious I just don't want everyone to work out who I am!
That's it really. I work in a department of 8 people someone has to work every day of the year no choice, it will mean working probably from 9 am until about 6 or 7 then being available by phone within 20 ish minutes of work for discussion and a probably 20% chance of going back in in the evening.

Normally who works when is agreed by discussion (invariably for normal people some want to work Christmas some New Year). This year there has been no discussion, my boss knows I am intending to leave (I have subsequently resigned but NOT for this reason) and in an effort to get the maximum return for her investment has produced a schedule which means I am working Christmas. I have been told this was done on purpose. The schedule was designed by a flunkie such that either me, him or his best mate would be working Christmas unsurprisingly he made this me.

I am the only person at work with children.

Whilst I fully recognise the rights of those without children to have a family Christmas or a holiday or an opportunity to booze ad infinitum (which is why for the first approximately 10 years of my life I worked EVERY Christmas) I feel that work is being unreasonable.For example one collegue got very cross with me because she feels that as one of 2 carers for her Mother her caring role isn't 'recognised' as much as mine and has equal status, I feel it is more complicated than that because my dh works in the same field so we have this problem multiplied by 2 every year and can never work the same day (it being illegal to leave small children home alone!) hence if we don't co-ordinate in some way we will get no breaks/bank holidays etc, it also transpires that her reason for not wanting to work Christmas is that her husband can take time off work without loosing any money but if he takes time of at other times he might loose work oportunities.

At the very least I feel Christmas should have been left out of the schedule and discussed separately.

So AIBU?

Um, I think you are being a little bit unreasonable, actually. It's such an emotive thing (I used to work in the NHS and it drove me absolutely nuts every year when everyone else would gang up on me because they had children and I didn't).

I don't think there's a heirarchy of reasons to want Christmas off (assuming you are fairly secular like most people, would you have gladly volunteered to work if the other two people had been serious, weekly church-going Christians?)

It probably should have been discussed, but if I were your boss I'd be thinking this year I'm going to reward loyalty and the people who may have to work Christmas next year can have this year off. The person who isn't going to be here next year can do it one last time. She's got to work with them after you're gone, and I can see purely pragmatic reasons that she might have favoured them. I do think it would have been more diplomatic/polite to explain the logic behind the decision to your face.

Sorry, that's probably not what you wanted to hear.

no. not being unreasonable.

christmas is so special for children.
can you take unpaid leave?

Thanks guys, thought there might be more views on this subject
ninedragons you're right that's not what I wanted to hear (but obv. expected to from someone-it would be boring if everyone agreed with me.)
The loyalty point though good for other fields doesn't really cut it we work in a uniquely unloyal job.(don't want to go into too many details on here sorry). This is not a long term job most will not be there next Christmas.
I also do think there is a hierarachy of reasons though! At one point New Year was more relevant to me and I regularly volunteered to work Christmas in exchange for New Year off. Whilst adult Christmases are totally enjoyable quite frankly if my family said lets do Christmas on Boxing Day this year it wouldn't make any difference, Christmas when you are 7 is totally different. I do also consider 'my dh might loose money if he takes time off at other times of the year' to be a lesser reason. Without wanting this to become a discussion about religion yes Christmas probably is more important to a deeply committed Christian, or a church organist than a Druid or Jedi knight and should probably be recognised as such.!
What I wanted was to see if anyone could come up with a reason other than a variation of 'just because you have children it doesn't mean you shouldn't work Christmas I enjoy eggnog with great Aunt Nellie' I wondered since so many on here had children we might have strange views of the other side.

when i was working before i had ds i always volunteered to do christmas eve[shut christmass]as i didnt have much to do at home and new the mums had wrapping cleaning bathing cooking...i think it is unfair you have to work christmas day

Thanks
Any more Christmas workers?

Not me but I have 2 friends in the NHS, both of whom are in teams where everyone takes a turn - Christmas one year, New Year the next.

Dh works in a sector which requires Christmas working. He had plenty of Xmases away, and not just away for the day but away for two weeks. This year he'll be working again, even though he's leaving the job a week later. And he'll not even be on the same continent, he'll be 3000 miles away. If you have a job where Xmas working is a requirement you have to take the rough with ther smooth, imo.

sorry but this is the real world I am afraid..... someone has to do it and you happen to be one of those someones... if you don't like it then maybe you should change career or get a job somewhere else...

This year will be the first Christmas in 4 years that dh doesnt have to work - he's the security superviser of a big retail park. He's dead chuffed, I'm a bit concerned at the fact he'll be under my feet all day but kids are delighted

opinionateddad I have made it perfectly clear several times that I have worked more than my fair share of Christmases I take it from your post you either never have or you don't particularly care?

40+ seems fair. I think what has annoyed me this time is that it has not been discussed. I have worked several jobs in my time where the same person has had Christmas Eve and New Years Eve or Christmas Day and New Years Day and I also think that is unreasonable. It should be decided in as mutually agreeable way possible. (I have voluntarily offered to do one of these days for other people in such an event because that is not fair I was however a bit grumpy when noone offered to reciprocate).
I have been given another indirect piece of evidence today yesterday this was done on purpose and it's niggling away at me.

i am working xmas night i have worked most xmas over 20 years bu8t pressies wait i dont always like it but someone has to do it

nearly 20 consecutive Christmas days at work must have been tough on your kids hazygirl you need more nice work collegues to spread the load.

I know what you do!

You're a hospital doctor ! I think that you are being mildly unreasonable. You ANBU to to wantto work Xmas if that makes sense but you ABU to expect not to however I think if you feel that you've been allocated Xmas as some sort of punishment for resigning then you ANBU.

Is that clear as mud??

In my job we traditionally either work Christmas or New Year.

Those with kids tend to be well accommodated if they specifically request Christmas off.

But I am lucky to work in a lovely team

eh?
In english please
I think it should have been discussed as is usual to unmake what everyone perceives as firm arrangements is hard, to come to mutual agreement makes everyone happy(ish)

Sorry NNB that was to LDDD

Ok,

If working Xmas has been given to you as a sort of punishment for resigning then you are not being unreasonable for being peeved that you are working Xmas.

If you have just been allocated Xmas as a random thing then you are still not being unreasonable in not wanting to work it, very few people actually want to work Xmas day, but I think you are being mildly unreasonable if working it really bothers you when you know that someone has to do it.

Is my opinion any clearer now??

LOng day at work, sorry for incoherence

As crystal
I agree ?everyone doesn't want to work it.
I suppose in a roundabout way it is because I pre-warned them I was leaving (memo to self-look after number 1 next time!!)
I still think it should have been discussed as separate thing.
Will you be workng Christmas this year? (If the answer is no that's not ment to negate your opinion just curious I'm keeping a tally so I can workout whether IABU or not and then trying to subdivide accordng to whether the opinions are from Christmas workers or not perhaps I should go to bed or go and do some real work!

LOng day Xmas Eve, off Xmas day and Boxing then annual leave 27th and 28th. I've been very lucky with the rota this year, I think I'm a step down the ladder from you and the loovely Muslim guy who does the rota organised it so that the non-Muslims get Xmas off and we do Eid and other days of Muslim significance. Happily no other religous groups on the rota or it would have been trickier.

I do think people with children and other dependants who live at home should be shown a little favouritism when it comes to Christmas.

It does make me feel a bit uneasy sometimes though. Why should Christmas be more important to me just because I have kids?

I'd get annoyed if a colleague assumed I wanted New Year off instead of Christmas just becaus e I had kids.

I had this a couple of years ago... "Oh Bernard wil do New Years Morning, she won't be going anywhere... I'll do the afternoon 'cos I've got a party to go to"

ok, people shouldn't make assumptions but generally speaking Christmas is a big Children Time of Year so parents really like to be there and new year tends to be a big Piss Up Time of Year and impossible to get a sitter.

Having said that, am glad to have Christmas off this year

Just think it shouldn't be assumed that those without kids will automatically be happy to work Christmas.

And that thos e with kids are happy to not work New Year!