To ask if you ever do something

[ivfbabymomma1]

.... that's so stupid without thinking & then your like why the f**k did I just do that?

I just made a cup of juice for my DS, and without putting the lid on chucked it in the bottom of the pram?! Why!!! What was I thinking?

My messiest was straining a tin of kidney beans in a sieve, I did it whilst walking across the kitchen leaving a horrible mess behind me.

The other day I was at home and panicked as I couldn't hear my daughter (3) went to look for her but couldn't find her anywhere, full on panic then I suddenly remembered she was at nursery

I once drained the pasta so the water went into the pasta bowl, then chucked the pasta in the sink

I was making a cocktail in the kitchen whilst hosting a dinner party and put lemonade in the cocktail shaker. I then proceeded to shake it at which point it exploded and the whole kitchen was covered in sticky liquid.

Added rice instead of sugar to some lovely porridge I made. FFS, what was I doing?

Holding hand blender in my right hand, thumb still over the 'pulse' button, I used my left forefinger to hook out some spinach that had got twisted around the blades....

Yeah. That is NOT why it's called a 'hand blender'. Muppet.

Oh, also, working in a catering kitchen, I sliced my thumb while cutting sandwiches. Which wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't instantly reacted by shaking my injured digit violently, splattering blood everywhere. We had to close while the whole kitchen was cleaned and sanitised.

I made the caramel topping for Millionaire's Shortbread once and scraped it off the wooden spoon with my little finger. That blistered nicely.

There have been many, many similar incidents though.

@multivac

Holding hand blender in my right hand, thumb still over the 'pulse' button, I used my left forefinger to hook out some spinach that had got twisted around the blades....

Yeah. That is NOT why it's called a 'hand blender'. Muppet.

I have an interesting scar on one finger.

@WorraLiberty

I was heating oil in pan once and I stuck my finger in to check how hot it was.

Very very hot was the answer 😵

I did similar, I was deep frying doughnuts and decided to flip one that was refusing to turn with my fingers instead of the tongs I had been using. It hurt. A lot.

Hugging my SIL goodbye, I went in for a snog. She positioned her head to return it. It was only a couple of seconds and then we both blinked and pretended it didn't happen

Walked onto our steep drive and nearly fell flat on my face due to black ice. For some reason, it never crossed my mind that my tyres would have the same problem. Reversed my car up the drive for the first part of my three point turn, then watched it slide gracefully straight into my husband's car. It was very serene as there was nothing I could do.

I then asked my husband why he didn't try to stop it as he was by his car (my car is on the large and heavy side). In the final instalment of the Laurel and Hardy show, he walked up to throw down some salt (a little too late) and fell so hard backwards that his arm was still bruised six months later.

I once had the wise idea to clean the hair off my razor by swiping my thumb across it. The thought of 4 bits of flappy skin still makes my teeth go

Cheerily handed the cashier my Next gift card and said I’d like to pay for the items in full with the gift card. The cashier looked at the gift card with a and me with a very long drawn out . I was in Accessorize.

I have on several occasions gotten into the passenger seat of my car after leaving the supermarket, by myself. I just have to busy myself in the glove compartment and pretend I’m looking for something before going round to get in the drivers seat.

I identify with so many of these! Two which I do far too regularly are:

Passing my phone to DH to speak to someone who has called, then turning back to continue browsing the internet on my phone, but I can't find it anywhere and get very frustrated. Of course DH is standing next to me chatting on it and giving me a strange look.

Putting some leftovers into a Tupperware and then returning the Tupperware to the drawer rather than putting it away in the fridge. It normally dawns on me an hour or so later that 'something' went wrong earlier and I go looking for the food and discover my mistake.

@Ratched

I was talking on my mobile, frantically searching for my mobile, convinced I had lost it. Chatting to my dad ( who drones on for hours), I mouthed to DH 'Lost my fucking phone, cant find it anywhere'. DH just nodded wisely. And smiled. Twat.

Pissing myself at this!

Put squash in the fabric softener drawer and the fabric softener in my glass. The thing is, I just said to dh ‘better not get those two mixed up’. Then I did! In my defence, I’d just had twins and was absolutely shattered.

Sorry very warped humour but some of these have had me crying.....sadly with laughter!

I was making a gin and tonic. I put the gin in the glass and then added a splash of milk as if it was a cup of tea.

Put an electric kettle on the gas hob, id filled a pan of water from pasta and the kettle at the same time, realised my mistake a moment later when I tried to put a large pan on the kettle base and a bad smell came from the hob! I'm my defense we had a 4 week old and I was breastfeeding every 1-2 hours!

I had to open a new pack of ground coffee to make my morning cafetiere, on a particularly early morning. Instead of spooning some out, I tipped the whole pack into the cafetiere. I knew something was wrong in the order I was doing things, so I got a spoon out. I knew that a spoon ought to be involved somehow. Then I stood there for what felt like about 45 minutes with no idea at all what to do next. I can't remember solving the problem but I must have done.

Tried to pay in Boots with my library card, got a bit stroppy when tapping it wouldn't work!
Made coffee and tea in the same cup.

Literally shaking with laughter reading these. I have done the usual juice in cereal instead of milk loads of times. I once grabbed a frozen yogurt tube from freezer and put it in DDs school lunch box. She came home with a thawed out mini- milk ice lolly.

Oh so many of these I have done. That is not a stealth boast.

last week I went for my monthly 'visit' to the office. It is a little scary being downtown with many more people than I have become used to, and I guess it made me a bit...unnerved.

Anyway, went into a small shop on the way in. Got to the office, double triple checking mask was in place. Said good morning to the few people there, walked into my office and sat at my computer, ready to roll. Found my glasses were not in my bag. Frantically looking around, I realized I must have put them down in the shop. I jumped back into the elevator, along the street, up the hill, into the shop, panting by now.

Hello. Did I leave my glasses on your counter?
Oh dear. What do they look like?
Cat eye shape, black rim with gold along the top.
Oh dear. No. not here, sorry.

I got well out of the door before the poor man got up the courage to call me back.

Miss. Is that them you are wearing?