Friend adding sugar to her toddler's water

[FurrySlipperBoots]

I have a newish friend (met at the end of summer this year) with a two year old. She's a good person and I don't want to rock the boat, but I'm disturbed by her adding sugar to her toddler's drink! She has a LOT of pure fruit juice which was worrying me already, so I was relieved to notice her drinking water one time - until I saw my friend refill it, and adding a tablespoon of sugar! She just said 'she doesn't like the taste otherwise' and we moved on, but it's been on my mind since.

On the one hand it's none of my business how she raises her child, but on the other how will I feel after hearing the poor munchkin has to have a bunch of teeth out under GA, and I'd never said anything to try and prevent that from happening? Surely my friend knows the damage sugar does? I mean it's not exactly a secret is it!

YABU - butt out, it's nothing to do with you what someone elses toddler drinks!

YANBU - advocate for the child and say something now!

I do realise that water in soft water areas can taste a bit grim but I’m sure you can get used to it!

It's the other way round!

We have nice soft water in Yorkshire- it tastes much nicer than water in other areas I visit. And it deosn't leave limescale deposits on everything either.

Advocate for the child? Really?

When my kids were babies my mum had an elderly friend who said she used to put sugar on meat to get kids to eat it

I don't think I could be friends with someone like that, I think it's bad enough putting sugar free squash in bottles, but actual sugar?! I cannot imagine I would have much in common with someone who thought it was ok to do that!

I know it happens, I've seen it and see the impact but genuinely cannot think of a reason why any reasonable, sane, intelligent person would think it was ok to do it.

I was a Paediatric Nurse and during my training in Ireland during the late 80's , a 3 month old baby was admitted with Failure to Thrive .I admitted him and asked the mother what way he was feeding and what formula he was on the mother replied '7Up he doesn't like the taste of milk' . The baby was totally emaciated and close to death.Still think of the poor little mite.

A tablespoon of sugar would never dissolve in water in a toddler's drink!

THIS DOES HAPPEN!!! People give their toddlers coke in bottles!

@shitinmyhandsandclap

Nah, not buying this. No-one is that stupid, and especially to do it in front of someone else.

Never happened

When I was first married, my neighbour used to add a couple of teaspoons of sugar to her baby's milk in their bottle.

Unfortunately there really are people dumb enough to do this. To other posters: If your water doesn’t taste good, have you tried using a water filter pitcher? It can work miracles on chalky water.

I am very surprised at the disbelief here. I know several children who had to have baby teeth pulled, because of too many sweets. I know one child who had to have 14 (!) baby teeth pulled, because the teeth were destroyed by sugar. Definitely say something to the mum.

Its crazy some people do this....babies drink water just fine! It is only when you give them juice etc they would start to prefer that. All my children drink water (including my 11 month old - she also breastfeeds...). Juice is only given to the older kids at birthday parties etc. We never have juice in the house. Just water and milk. Its shocking what some people will give their kids.

That 7up story and the baby is so sad...

For those people saying 'didn't happen' they certainly did used to do this years ago. My mum suggested I did it when DS didn't want to drink water . I can certainly see that if you have families where they take advice from older family members rather than professionals that this could happen . As you get to know her better maybe suggest some sugar free squash , although this has its own concerns with artificial sweeteners.

Redolent I am Irish and it was very common amongst the older generations. That 7Up story is so sad. I hope the child is well and happy now.

@Redolent those studies are fake news.

If you think sugar is as addictive as cocaine then you’ve clearly never tried cocaine

I'll take "things that didn't happen" for £500

@FreekStar

*I do realise that water in soft water areas can taste a bit grim but I’m sure you can get used to it!*

It's the other way round!

We have nice soft water in Yorkshire- it tastes much nicer than water in other areas I visit. And it deosn't leave limescale deposits on everything either.

I’m with you on this one. Sitting in a London taxi after we relocated and I mentioned that the tap water wasn’t very nice and completely different to the stuff in Birmingham (which is piped from Wales ) and he descended into raptures about Birmingham water being like pure rainwater . Somebody did try and convince me hard water is better for preventing heart disease

@FurrySlipperBoots no good will come from you commenting to your friend. People get very defensive over their child’s diets so leave it to the professionals to comment (and they will). The best you can do is model better choices.

@BuggerationFlavouredCrisps

Whilst I don’t think it’s a great idea per se, it’s better to add ordinary sugar in a drink than use any of those ‘no added sugar’ squash shite substitutes.

I’m convinced that the artificial sugars such as aspartame are far more damaging than ordinary sugar and potentially carcinogenic. I’ve always had migraines after eating or drinking anything with artificial sweeteners so I think my body is trying to warn me off them.

Artificial sweeteners are among the most-studied ingredients in the world. They are not damaging or carcinogenic.

The effects of too much sugar, however, are very well documented and understood.

Can you suggest an alternative to her? Perhaps next time say “I remember you saying your daughter doesn’t like water...have you tried (name of some bottled water etc)? My child loves it and it’s nicer than hard water.

She already knows it's bad but she does it anyway. It would be pointless to try and intervene.
It's like smoking, popular in the olden days when people didn't really know better, but people still choose to do it nowdays with full knowledge that it's an unhealthy habit.

The poor childs teeth will rot before they appear,but its the mothers business tbh. And you dont want to ruin your friendship.

My DH and his brothers were given milk with sugar in at bedtime until they were in their teens. Their bad teeth are genetic apparently.
I honestly don't know what I'd do in your situation though OP.

@shitinmyhandsandclap

Nah, not buying this. No-one is that stupid, and especially to do it in front of someone else.

Never happened

But some people are this stupid. I don't think OP is making this up.

This definitely is a thing that happens and unfortunately parents don’t often listen to advice from professionals about it so I wouldn’t risk getting into an argument about it with a friend. It’s really hard to get people to believe that thirsty children will drink water, but if they’ve had sweetened drinks from a young age then that is what they will come to expect. When you take children’s teeth out for a living (which is what I do) and you’ve seen 2 and 3 year olds coming round from GA confused and crying with a mouthful of blood, you would never give a young child anything but milk and water. But trust me, people will not believe you because it works for them and they won’t believe that the damage was caused by their choices.

That's absolutely despicable really. Poor kid.