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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think he’s too young?

106 replies

Tunnocks34 · 08/11/2020 13:12

My son is 7. He’s asked for an x box for Christmas - I think this is too young personally, but I’m not sure if maybe I’m being precious over this?

He doesn’t have a tablet, or anything currently, although he has some educational apps on my phone which he is allowed to play with occasionally.

IF and it’s a massive IF I were to get him one, it would be kept in the living room, no fighting games, and time kept to a minimum and only on a weekend day.

Anyway:

YABU - 7 is fine for a games console as long as it is monitored properly

YANBU - 7 is too Young!

OP posts:

Bluejewel · 08/11/2020 18:16

Hold off if you can - mine had tablets at 6/8 and PS4 at 9/11 . Tablet was too early and can take over . 9 feels about right but with age appropriate games

Bluntness100 · 08/11/2020 18:25

Why hold off? She can get age appropriate game, they can be hugely beneficial to kids. He doesn’t need to spend all his time on there.

Benjispruce2 · 08/11/2020 18:57

It’s a slippery slope.

mushroom3 · 08/11/2020 19:01

too young, wait until around 11. lego is a good gift for this age

OhDearMuriel · 08/11/2020 19:07

Be very careful they get so addicted on these devices.
If I had known this, I would never have got my DS one.
99% of the problems/upset we have is due to this.

BiBabbles · 08/11/2020 19:17

I wouldn't buy a 7-year-old a gift that I was so heavily restricting. That doesn't feel like a gift, especially for a child, to me.

We don't do consoles as individual presents, they're 'family gifts'. Switch does probably have more for a 7-year-old, my 8 year old prefers it to other options.

Yes, there is some evidence of potential benefits, though the evidence isn't as strong as some like to say (I say as a big gamer, I have to laugh when people go on about all the cognitive benefits. It's very much cherry picking of data there). Like everything there are also risks and thinking through how it fits within many other parts of life. With adding it, I'd also add in other non-electronic fun alongside it.

reefedsail · 08/11/2020 19:26

I think it depends what else the DS in question does. If he has nothing else in his life, then an xbox is introduced, yes it may well take over and become the centre of his universe.

However, if it is just going to be added in as another element of a balanced lifestyle, then it is fine.

My DS is 10 and has had PS4 since he was 8 and is upgrading to a gaming pc for Christmas. He likes gaming and talks to his friends on his headset regularly. However, he also sails on a national squad and happily spends many, many hours out on the water. He (pre-covid) chooses to book himself into flexi-boarding at school regularly to spend more free time with his friends. He cheerfully goes on family walks and plays board games with us. Does his prep to a good standard without complaining. It's all about balance and not letting gaming be the only thing.

Simplyunacceptable · 08/11/2020 19:28

It’s about right imo. My older ones are 8, 9 and 10 and they have a tablet each and eldest has a switch too. They got them for Christmas last year, before that they shared an iPad which was a logistical nightmare.

I don’t think 7 is too young at all.

Junobug · 08/11/2020 19:30

We have a family xbox. My older 2 are 8 and 6. This morning they played minecraft for a couple of hours and then.... turned it off and went to play outside for hours. I had to call them in when it was dark.
Of course gaming can be addictive but if children are given access to physical play, they will choose that. The problem comes when we don't let our children out but expect them not to escape to an online world because of it.
I agree, a switch might be better at that age but it's no less addictive than an xbox or tablet.

MustardMitt · 08/11/2020 19:31

A tablet is much harder to police than a console. They can sit right next to you and can't see what's going on whereas on a tv you can.

There are loads of Lego games on the xbox. We also have a Switch; personally we all prefer the xbox.

Also it's really not a given that it'll turn to arguments. Set healthy boundaries now so they don't become a surprise later!

silverbubbles · 08/11/2020 19:40

Too young. Do you very best to delay any gaming for as long as possible. Can't you get him excited about something else?

It's all very well to to have your 'rules' etc etc. I am a very strict mum but the gaming antics and addiction these children suffer are enough to push you over the edge.

Try your very hardest to get him interested in other things. if at 7yrs he starts gaming there is no turning back.

silverbubbles · 08/11/2020 19:43

@Junobug

We have a family xbox. My older 2 are 8 and 6. This morning they played minecraft for a couple of hours and then.... turned it off and went to play outside for hours. I had to call them in when it was dark. Of course gaming can be addictive but if children are given access to physical play, they will choose that. The problem comes when we don't let our children out but expect them not to escape to an online world because of it. I agree, a switch might be better at that age but it's no less addictive than an xbox or tablet.

You are not correct to say that children will choose physical play over gaming.

Your children might but many, many children do not.

Generalconfusion · 08/11/2020 19:44

Much too young, OP. Gaming is really normalised but it's not good for their young brains. Any google will tell you that.

earthyfire · 08/11/2020 19:49

My son started off with handhelds first, speaking from experience I'd definitely hold off as long as you can. When my son got an xbox I had it in the living room where he had limited time to play and it was a while before I bought him the headset to communicate with others - he is a teen now so is quite good at managing his time when playing it.

Scarlettpixie · 08/11/2020 19:56

It’s tricky. I am not sure what age appropriate games are available for that age. We already had an Xbox (DH) abd Wii (me) when DS was born!

At 7 he played a lot of stuff on the wii. Mario galaxy, mario cart, wii sport, Skylanders (that was big) and disney infinity. He liked collecting the characters. I think he got into Minecraft a little later. Thinking about it. Skylanders and Disney infinity were also available on Xbox 360 and he may have played one or the other on Xbox.

He might be better with the wii u or switch although games (for the switch at least) can be really expensive. All things to factor in. Maybe discuss with DS why he wants and Xbox, look at the available games. In my mind Xbox is for slightly older but may no longer be the case. It is really good at allowing you to put safeguards in place.

DS had his own Xbox one x at 12 (he is now 14). By that age he was wanting to play online games with his friends. He had a switch last year (the option for hand held or on tv is good) and still plays on the old wii. He has been replaying Mario galaxy recently and is obviously much better at it now!

33goingon64 · 08/11/2020 20:17

We got DS a Switch for his 8th birthday. He'd been asking for an X box since he was 6 so that was the promise we made - by the time he was 8 the Switch was out.

calamityjam · 08/11/2020 20:26

I've brought up 5 dcs. We always had game consoles right from the PlayStation 1 to the Xbox s that my 13 year old now owns. If you have an only child, I would wait for an Xbox until year 6 if you possibly can but you've no chance after that as he will probably be socially isolated without one (can't believe I'm writing that, but it's very true). Mine all played on their older siblings so were well versed in gaming at younger ages. They all had their own Nintendo hand held before they had a game station, so I agree get a switch first, then see if he will wait a few years for an Xbox

nestisflown · 08/11/2020 20:37

My 4 year got a switch as a gift from someone but I didn’t let them play it until they were older. I think it’s like smart phones and social media- once you open the floodgates they are difficult to shut again.

I guess you could get the x box and only allow age appropriate games?

RoseGold7 · 08/11/2020 20:48

I think playing video games is fine at that age as long as you monitor how long he’s on there. I wouldn’t get him Xbox Gold though as he’d be talking to strangers. I loved playing video games when I was younger than your son. I was also an avid reader and played out a lot and went to different extracurricular clubs.

Zoflorabore · 08/11/2020 20:53

My ds’s dad and I are separated and he is massively into tech and gaming and has more money than sense.

Ds is 17 and when he was 8 he got the brand new iPhone 4 for Christmas, I wasn’t pleased. He also had every console mainly at his dads and just the Xbox at ours.

His dad is the type to upgrade his stuff as soon as a new or better model comes out and thankfully my lovely ds is quite the opposite and refuses to get new ones if not needed. He has self regulated throughout his teens and has never given me any cause for concern. I believe it’s not the console of choice that is the problem but the games that are played. Ds loves FIFA with his friends, all chatting away to each other on their microphones and it was invaluable during lockdown.

Kids of 7 have a lot more tech than many would think. Some even have better phones than their parents! My dd is 9 and not at all interested in gaming and I’m very happy about that.

Hamm87 · 08/11/2020 21:15

Switch it no good if he wants to play football games so you will just end up wasting money

Hersetta427 · 09/11/2020 09:05

I will not be buying one for DS (9) full stop. He has a switch but he won't be allowed anything that requires online multi-player play.

PineappleUpsideDownCake · 15/11/2020 09:43

We're probably choosing between switch and xbox for my daughter, nearly 12.

Thing is we really dont have a lot of money (covid) so had planned to buy second hand and buy second hand games. But I cant get my head round any of it at all.

I think she'd like the active and fun games more. She just wants to "play" rather than be a serious gamer. I'm worried I see friends of mine whose kids who are addicted though. Or who dont do family walks as want to get back and play/play instead of watching movies together.

AllTheUserNamesAreTaken · 15/11/2020 09:48

I think it’s too young really. DS is 7 and plays minecraft on our tablet or occasionally a game on my phone.
He hasn’t mentioned anything else and we are definitely going to hold off as long as possible. If we were to get him something like that it would be a switch

We do have a Wii which is almost twice DS’ age and DS loves it when we get that out occasionally - he likes to play Mario or circus games.

Soxandseven · 15/11/2020 10:15

Get him an Xbox without live? Then he can only play the games you buy for him, and the main issue of speaking to other (idiots) people is removed?

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