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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Shop assistant coughing

174 replies

NameChangeAgain2 · 06/11/2020 20:56

I've just been to the local one shop stop to get milk (missing from our supermarket delivery). The shop assistant, wearing her mask on her chin, burst into a coughing fit half way through scanning. She turned away and drank some water then pulled her mask up before turning back and told me 'it's not Corona, people have been asking all day, I'm just full of a cold'. She looked really sweaty.

I'm so upset. I'm shielding a relative and haven't been to the local shop since February.

Aibu to think she shouldn't be at work if she's coughing all over the place to the point people have been asking her is if she has the virus all day? I have no idea if she's had a test, she might just be assuming it's a cold. We've been so careful. I want to phone the shop and ask if she's had a test, if not I still have chance to leave the house now before possibly getting sick and passing it on to the shielding relative. I also want to complain that they were wearing their masks on their chins. What's the point that isn't helping anything!

OP posts:
DeeCeeCherry · 07/11/2020 01:42

YANBU OP. Why shouldn't you be worried over a bout of continuous coughing? If it wasn't a worry we wouldn't be in lockdown would we? That isn't to say it isn't normal to cough sometimes but ongoing coughing is bound to cause a reaction. That's just life right now.

People are selfish, and deliberately obtuse. Including some employers who make it clear that presenteeism is necessary at (almost) all costs.

I work with a smoker who coughs all day and have had to tell her sorry, even if masked I just don't want her coughing near me. It's a public building and people do look and shy away, because they're not to know it's a smokers cough are they? & Even though I know it is I STILL don't want her coughing in my direct work space all day. It's unpleasant to say the least and she appears to lack awareness that she needs to get to a non-smoking service as I can't imagine that much coughing bodes well for her. People come, hear her coughing and you can see the anxiety on them. I don't think they're silly to be wary.

We're all just trying to do our best in unusual circumstances, and pretending certain things aren't worrying doesn't help

Goosefoot · 07/11/2020 02:42

If she had covid a month ago the best we know is that she's no longer contagious. Which is why she'll have had to go back to work even if she feels crappy.

nellyburt · 07/11/2020 08:58

[quote NameChangeAgain2]@pollylocketpickedapocket Really? We have stayed home. I've had to deregister my kids from school. I haven't been in the shop since February. Are you in Manchester? People are stockpiling and there were several things missing from our delivery. I didn't want my gran to go a week without a cup or tea. I didn't expect to get coughed on.[/quote]
This just brings up so many questions.

How old are your children and how are they coping with being home all this time?

Do you live with your grandmother?

I also live in the north west in an area with a higher rate than Manchester and it's no the apocalypse out there.

Wear a mask, wash your hands and distance from your grandma.

You have take. A year from your children. Are you normally very anxious?

nellyburt · 07/11/2020 09:00

Sorry for the typos! I'll try again.

This just brings up so many questions.

How old are your children and how are they coping with being home all this time?

Do you live with your grandmother?

I also live in the north west in an area with a higher rate than Manchester and it's not the apocalypse out there.

Wear a mask, wash your hands and distance from your grandma.

You have taken a year from your children. Are you normally very anxious?

Witchcraftandhokum · 07/11/2020 09:08

Replace the word 'shop' with 'school' and 'shop assistant' with 'student' and you'd have some very different responses here.

MrsMomoa · 07/11/2020 09:18

Awwlookatmybabyspider

The thing is people have been coughing long before Covid. We can't all start freaking out every time someone coughs

This!
People are going to have to start getting a bloody grip!

Requinblanc · 07/11/2020 09:23

Her mask should be on her face at all time when serving customers...not on her chin. She might have a had a test though that confirmed it was not covid. I would have spoken to the store manager and pointed out that their employee was potentially putting customers at risk. Try to book yourself a test too.

AwaAnBileYerHeid · 07/11/2020 09:35

For those saying the OP is being unreasonable, how exactly is she being unreasonable by being worrier that she's been in contact with someone who has a cough, looked sweaty and has coughed all over her and her shopping. Especially when she is shielding a vulnerable relative. In what world would it be unreasonable to worry and to want to know if the person did in fact have covid?

Duemarch2021 · 07/11/2020 10:00

Why do people keep saying "people with symptoms don't spread the virus, it's the people with no symptoms that spread corona virus"

That's not true!!! And i hope people don't actually belive that!?? .... of course people who have corona can spread it when they have sympotoms!!

The point that is trying to be made here when government say that is .. if people dont have symptoms they think they dont have it so they go out and aren't as careful..then it spreads
.... people with symptoms are more careful so they tend to stay in isolating and being careful

Still makes them contagious though!!!

ReggaetonLente · 07/11/2020 10:12

I had a bit of a runny nose, was a bit tired, no fever and no cough, didn't isolate as i didn't have any of the 'big 3'. Assumed an autumn cold.

Then i lost my sense of taste and smell. Got a test - its covid.

I really don't think in the current climate anyone can be asserting 'it's just a cold' without being tested. This is how it is spreading.

Simplyunacceptable · 07/11/2020 10:19

Coughs can last a long time after shaking off a cold. My DS still has the cough from a cold he developed 4 weeks ago. He has been tested and it was negative, I knew it was just a cold anyway because he wasn’t particularly unwell and didn’t have a temp plus had a snotty nose and lots of sneezes etc. Covid and colds are different.

I know it’s a frightening time and easy to become afraid when you hear people coughing but generally speaking it’s most likely a cold at this time of year or maybe an asthma flare up. Having said that, she should have had her mask on.

ILiveNearby · 07/11/2020 10:23

Gosh this is the new cancel the cheque!

Read OPs updates. The woman’s cough is due to Covid last month, not a cold.

Sugarhouse · 07/11/2020 10:28

Anyone with a new cough should get tested even if you think it’s just a cold. A close relative had cold symptoms runny nose sneezing and developed a temp so got tested it was Covid. I developed a cold and a cough thought it was just a cold but I’m not a selfish Idiot got a test. It was negative but I couldn’t have gone to work in my hospitality job without checking first. It must be very worrying for you op I don’t blame you for ringing.

Leannethom85 · 07/11/2020 14:12

I know if 3 people who displayed no symptoms and tested positive, the ones who test positive generally stay and go by the rules, how do you know you haven't got covid? When were you tested? Exactly how do you know you have t got it and passing it on to everyone you come into contact with, at least if someone is coughing it's up to you to be more vigilant and stay away from person and dispose of mask ASAP and change into another. So if anything it's your information that's wrong!

Oulidae · 07/11/2020 14:16

If she was behind a screen then legally she does not need to wear a mask

Scottishskifun · 07/11/2020 14:24

If concerned with measures in the shop in general and staff member then contact your local environmental health team. They will speak to the business to find out what measures they have in place and they work with the legislation every day so can advise businesses.

For some businesses they need improvements others need a gentle reminder but some are completely compliant and it's just down to personal perspective. Either way they are objective about it.

AlternativePerspective · 07/11/2020 14:25

I take a drug called ramipril one of the side effects of which is a dry cough. Should I stay out of circulation in case my cough upsets someone?

FWIW I have shielded and have left my house only seven times since March, and four of those were to go to hospital appointments. And each time I have been paranoid when I have coughed.

I wear a mask because although I am exempt I have spent time on both a ventilator and oxygen in the past and have no desire to repeat the experiences, but the reality is that coughing is, for the most part, something which most people have happen to them at some point. To expect someone to be off work purely because they have any kind of cough is unreasonable.

Curlygirl06 · 07/11/2020 14:25

@Oulidae

If she was behind a screen then legally she does not need to wear a mask
I wish more people realised this. You can wear a mask if you want to but you don't HAVE TO!
Aridane · 07/11/2020 14:28

@Witchcraftandhokum

Replace the word 'shop' with 'school' and 'shop assistant' with 'student' and you'd have some very different responses here.
Well, yes - because it would be an entirely different situation
LolaSmiles · 07/11/2020 14:36

Well, yes - because it would be an entirely different situation
Exactly.

If someone is at work coughing then their employer knows. If they're allowed to be in work then they're allowed to be there without customers calling up to complain / report them etc (it was sheer luck the OP got through to the exact person).

It feels like this lockdown is bringing out people who think they know more about total strangers than the people themselves and they feel entitled to ask for information on strangers.

I had a cold and a negative test. When I went back to work (school) I spent weeks paranoid that some busybody was going to take it upon themselves to report me or try to demand my medical information. I'm well aware of parents in different contexts trying to fish for information on other parents and members of staff. One of my colleagues reassuringly said that nobody would be thay ridiculous, but as this thread shows, clearly there are people who really do think they're entitled to know people's personal health information.

BanjoStarz · 07/11/2020 14:39

@DenimDrift

She had it a month ago.? So was tested?

I’d not believe the ‘no longer contagious’ part, we don’t know enough to say she is 100% clear now

Apart from we do Hmm

Medical studies have show that 95% of people at 10 days after onset of symptoms are no longer producing replication competent COVID rna - so they’re not capable is passing on virus that could infect someone else - this rises to close to 100% of subjects in the studies once you hit 3 weeks post beginning of symptoms - that’s from the CDC data, I read the NHS one that said similar the other day as well. Obviously the studies are still ongoing as it’s a novel virus, but there’s a reason isolation is set at 10 days post symptoms beginning and it’s not just because it’s a nice even number.

She shouldn’t be coughing all over people’s shopping, that’s disgusting even outside of a viral pandemic, but she’d be a medical marvel if she was still contagious at this point.

OverTheRainbow88 · 07/11/2020 14:42

@DramaLlama12

You can get it twice!
They think immunity only lasts 4/6 months so if you had it in March you could now have it again; but more mild.

withlotsoflove · 07/11/2020 14:55

YOU DO NOT HAVE TO WEAR A MASK IF YOU ARE BEHIND A SCREEN!
IF YOU LEAVE YOUR POSITION FROM BEHIND THE SCREEN / YOU MUST POP ON YOUR MASK!
for those still insisting you must wear one at all times!
🤦‍♀️

I’m sick of the general public dictating what retail workers should:shouldn’t do!
If you can’t face the shops... stay the fuck at home. At least that’s one less person we have to worry about that could contaminate us!

stackemhigh · 07/11/2020 15:00

YABU I think. I'm careful for my mum who has been shielding since March and who we're in a bubble with. You should have been more careful, using a self-scan machine. I would have believed her when she said it wasn't corona.

stackemhigh · 07/11/2020 15:02

@Duemarch2021

How are people saying OP is being unreasonable!???? It is mandatory to wear masks and this woman had it on her chin when she knows she has a cough! The whole point in the masks is to cath any coughs/sneezes/ spitting when talking etc and se blatantly coughed all over the place!! OP said she looked sweaty -i bet she hasnt been tested... and anyone saying "she shouldn't have to wear a mask if shes so ill with a cold because she wont be able to breathe" well she shouldn't be in work then! Its disgraceful and yes phone the shop and report it .. ask is she had a test
If OP is being careful, why on earth is she going to a shop where the assistant isn't behind perspex screen? Does no-one take personal responsibility anymore?