Family court

[dublingirl66]

Feel so so let down

Got a case end of next week
Barrister was supposed to guide me through it all
Send paperwork
Give me a change to reply to a few things

Not heard a word

Second time this has happened and just feeling so alone tonight
Have not told my family as my brother is ill and may not survive so don't want to worry them
Really have no one to speak to
Paying her THOUSANDS and I'm just fuming
But if I say something this may go against me

Handhold please or even little words of wisdom would mean a lot right now

Ah I see ok that is good to know

I will wait and see I think

It is a hearing In NI for indirect contact

The perpetrator faces criminal charges for trying to murder me in the room beside the baby last year

So I am hoping family court will wait to see the outcome of criminal court

Thank you for being so clear about this

And yes possibly she has been up to her eyeballs

I just feel so so let down

Sorry to hear you are feeling let down and sorry if I haven’t been clear about the type of hearings (“for indirect contact” could be either type mentioned in my other post but fairly fundamental to how the hearing will go)

I would definitely go back to your solicitor and raise the points.

Best of luck - I hope you get the result that you want and deserve.

*Got a case end of next week
Barrister was supposed to guide me through it all
Send paperwork
Give me a change to reply to a few things

Not heard a word

Didn't you chase her up?

Thanks so so much

Yes I chased
Many times through solicitor

It is a case of things not been done

Everything last minute and no clue what will go in next

Can you make a complaint about her? I would.

I will need to sadly

Hate doing things like this but come on
This is so serious you need to get your act together

I have just been through this.
I self represented in the end as it took a year of hearings and totted up to ££££
You dont need a barrister till final hearing your solicitor can be doing this stuff....you can write your position statement yourself etc and your solicitor can prepare the court bundle - that is the tricky bit.
Its stressful chasing people so sack her.
Save your money for the barrister till the final hearing you dont need one at the moment in fact finding.
Find a new one for later, one who has better recommendations, but they won't communicate much with you directly, barristers really do read your file the day before and turn up in court.
Tell your solicitor to pull her finger pull her finger out too, make sure they are not eeking you out for ££ they should know a barrister isnt needed at fact finding stage! ...

Dublingirl66 I’ve pm’d you

Thank you all so so much

Lots of this should be being done by your solicitor and frankly they should be worrying about the barrister, not you. Have you had a proper chat with your solicitor about this. They can advice what’s normal and what’s not. It may be that it’s all under control (isn’t this what your solicitor said).

Family courts/barristers are chronically underfunded and underpaid. I’m sure she isn’t just sitting around doing nothing she will be dealing with something more urgent than yours.

Deep breath and speak to your solicitor.

There’s several very good face book groups
Mothers unite is one
The court said is another
There’s some really good knowleable and supportive women on there.
One is helping my friend to get back her children that were given to the abusive ex 2.5 years ago
Totally destroyed those young children’s lives

Could she be aware the bill is going to be tough for you op? Every call adds up the £££.. If she has told you there is a good case maybe have some faith that is true.
She will have gathered what she needs from you and others and put it all together.. Sorry you feel let down but on the day miracles really can happen.
Stay strong.
Ime anyway

Ah thanks all

Yes so true

Plus with everything going on maybe she took on more cases

Just all so very upsetting and then to pay thousands to be put through all this

My solicitor is lovely and has tried to reassure me many times too also
But for me in my job I would never let a vulnerable worried person down like this EVER
I earn 1 / 4 of what she earns and I go over and above

A lot of this has already been covered, but, to add my perspective:

1. If the Court has directed a position statement to be filed by a certain date it needs to be filed by that date. Speak to your solicitor urgently to find out what’s going on and who is going to be taking responsibility with the court.

1. If a phone conference has been arranged, it will have gone into the barrister’s diary. Save for an unexpected situation like a case overrunning in Court, there’s no reason for the conference not to have taken place. Again, speak to your solicitor urgently.

1. A barrister will not take the case unless there is payment on account, so you will need to pay the fees to the solicitor’s client account in advance. It’s too risky to take a case on without knowing the money is there.

1. A lot of barristers do work on cases at the last minute. But that doesn’t mean missing court deadlines or cancelling conferences. If work needs to be done by a certain date, it needs to be done by that date, even if the hearing itself is days/weeks away.

1. If you’ve lost confidence in your representation, you need to speak to your solicitor and see if a replacement can be found. You don’t necessarily need to act in person, but you do need to have confidence in the person acting for you.

Good luck

Ps don’t assume she earns 4x what you earn. By the time she’s paid chambers rent, VAT, income tax etc she’ll take home less than half what you have paid and will have spent many many unseen hours on prep.

Thank you
Thank you
All of you

Much appreciated

Little less worried now
Will go ahead with her

Just so upset

It is total last min and not one thing done as promised

Really hope it all goes your way, OP.

Thank you

Will survive

Just how dare they treat vulnerable people so badly

Wishing you all the best OP.
It's a long road but you clearly have the will to survive ❤️

It's a long arduous road

With a bit of luck she will charge maybe a bit less for all the hassle she has put me through

May make a complaint to the Law Society too

Or pay and say nothing
Just chalk it down to some people not treating others fairly !!!

Story of my life at the min 😢

Thank you all for the help as always

So he is pushing for in direct contact before he applies for a transfer of care !! Wtaf!!

Judge said we need to wait to see the outcome from the criminal case in which he is charged with attempted murder

In many ways my legal rep was great just so very last min
I mean like submitting day before the case and letting me know the outcome days later
I find that hard especially as I will be paying 4-5 k for their help

Rooting for you op.
What helped me was making a mental note to self not to think about ex while my dc were up. Once they went to bed my thoughts ran wild. But enjoying them during the day was def not being tainted by stressing about that twat!!
Make notes of anything you remember but aren't sure if it's relevant.. One day it may be.

Keep us updated if you feel able.
Wish mn had been around for me 20 years ago...

What you’re describing is not unusual. Position statements are filed the day before as standard. It can then take days to fix the exact wording of a contentious order which then has to go to the judge for approval. You should be given the gist of the order immediately but it is entirely normal for it to take days to get an approved order.

I know the DV makes this hard for you but I suggest you get a professional second opinion before you start thinking of complaints to The Law Society. What happened may have been normal and perfectly understandable in the circumstances. If you need extra hand holding and support, that needs to be factored into costs estimates for the future.

Please do take professional advice and not rely on internet ransoms. I was appalled to read the suggestion upthread that a barrister is unnecessary at a fact finding hearing. A poor showing there could ruin your whole case. In your case it sounds like that may not be needed if the criminal case goes the right way. If it does not then you must take expert advice ASAP.

It is incredible common to have no contact at all with the barrister -none. I only speak to my solicitor. There will be what you want ,what he wants -and then the barrister has to argue your case. In many cases there is such limited evidence it is a questions or a versus b and the reality could well be in the middle.

In my experience my ex paid for a argumentative barrister who would not negiotate. I was represented by a man who my solicitor recommended. And he stuck to the facts, and put my case concisely whilst seeming VERY reasonable -the court sided with my barrister although my ex did get some contact. He was very experienced but I wanted no contact- and I needed to accept he would get some.

In your case, your barrister will be waiting on other things. I hope the criminal case goes "well" for you. If he is done for attempted murder -and that case has that outcome -it will give your solicitor and barrister the lever they need.