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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU about filming incidents?

90 replies

MsStillwell · 30/10/2020 11:43

This is something that happened yesterday that's been playing on my mind.

Whilst shopping, I came across a couple of men fighting. They were drug addicts squabbling outside the pharmacy about £4 that one still owed/had already paid the other. One male passerby was attempting to calm things down, another male passerby had stopped to do the same as me - see if he could help and generally support the man who was intervening.

What really got my goat was the people who stopped to do nothing but film. Why do people do this? I said to one young female, "I don't think you should be filming this" and she replied, "Yeah well they shouldn't be doing it". I have more respect for people who carry on walking and don't get involved.

When I was growing up people who stopped to gawp at things like this were called ghouls and it was a shameful thing to do. Now it passes as an opportunity to get likes. It's behaviour that seems completely lacking in human kindness, dignity and respect.

OP posts:
Sparklesocks · 30/10/2020 14:32

I think intent and context is important.

If someone is shouting racist abuse at somebody in the street, filming might be useful evidence to help bring the perpetrator to justice.

However if it was say..a drunk homeless person causing a scene but not harming anyone, or somebody clearly mentally unwell having a difficult moment - I don’t see how filming serves other than to mock the person involved. There is a lady who lives near us who isn’t very well, she talks to herself sometimes as she walks down the street but she’s not aggressive/doesn’t bother anyone and social services are familiar with her. I’ve seen people laughing and filming her before which always feels cruel and sneering, it serves no purpose.

On this occasion it’s hard to say as I didn’t witness it, but I think filming generally is only justified if there’s a crime taking place.

Confusedamonium · 30/10/2020 14:35

As much as it seems cold and cruel, filming things is really important for law enforcement, for preserving history, for understanding culture, for proving things etc etc etc. Think about the videos of the Hong Kong protests for example.
I have epilepsy and, although it would seem callous, my neurologist said it would be really helpful to have videos of my seizures.

LolalovesLondon · 30/10/2020 14:40

If the person who stood and filmed George Floyd being murdered hadn’t done so, his murderers would be free men.

LolalovesLondon · 30/10/2020 14:43

Filming the aftermath of an accident or injury is just sick but filming an attack provides police with evidence.

Original poster
MsStillwell · 30/10/2020 14:52

I'm not saying that the people filming the incident you describe definitely had good intentions but I don't think it's always clear cut

I think you make a good point. In this case none of the people filming stepped forward when the police arrived.

Two people rowing over £4. Who cares enough to film?

Presumably people who get a kick out of impoverished drug addicts arguing over a small amount of money.

“” I have more respect for people who carry on walking and don't get involved.”” But you didn’t just walk by either.

Well no, because I was in a position to take some action and do something helpful Hmm

OP posts:
Original poster
MsStillwell · 30/10/2020 14:54

I think some people have made excellent points about the benefits of filming crimes in progress and there are times I've wondered if I'd have been better off filming than calling 999 (I have always done the latter).

However, in this case, you'll have to take my word for it that the people filming were not good citizens gathering evidence. When I said I didn't think she should film it, she didn't say "I'll show the police when they get here".

OP posts:
LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 30/10/2020 14:58

I agree with you OP. I think it's a really scummy thing to do but some people just are as low as can be. Sign of the times I suppose, and not for the better.

GrannyWeatherwaxsHatpin · 30/10/2020 14:59

YANBU.

A terrorist attack happened where I live a few months ago and some god-awful ghoul walked around it, filming the people who were dead and dying and the paramedics/police trying to save them. He put it on Twitter (who thankfully deleted it and banned him, although he popped up with another account). I just cannot understand the mentality of these people who want to involve themselves in other peoples' tragedies - not to help but to be the centre of attention.

May all their itches forever be unreachable.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 30/10/2020 15:00

LolaLovesLondon... This isn't aimed at you as I think some share your view also, it's just yours was the last post with that view.

How many instances though would you think are NOT provided to the police for evidence, but for facebook 'likes' by attention-seeking, deficient people? It would be really interesting for any police officers/workers here to comment on that.

Pukkatea · 30/10/2020 15:03

Where I am the majority of incidents you come across are the sort of thing where getting involved would be very stupid and unhelpful and filming would be the only thing that would get a criminal prosecuted.

emilyfrost · 30/10/2020 15:05

I don’t see the issue with it, and actually it can be quite beneficial. Nobody should be doing anything in public that they don’t mind others seeing anyway.

You were very rude to try and police someone else’s behaviour with a pointed remark.

LolalovesLondon · 30/10/2020 15:06

Lying
I think the motive for 99% of the filming is for social media ‘hits’ you are right.
Having said that, if I was being attacked I would hope that those not helping me (you’d hope that was at least someone’s first instinct) would film it for evidence.

emilyfrost · 30/10/2020 15:06

When I said I didn't think she should film it, she didn't say "I'll show the police when they get here".

She doesn’t need to explain herself to you.

Goosefoot · 30/10/2020 15:06

I'm generally with the others, there are times when it might be a good idea but often it's not. My guess is people filming the addicts are not trying to be helpful.

I do think incidents where people have filmed police or other crimes can be a real two edged sword though. It can be very revealing, but just because something is filmed doesn't mean that all is as it appears. And sometimes people now will start incidents with the idea that they will film them.

CherryValanc · 30/10/2020 15:06

@Soubriquet

I will never forget reading about a woman who went into labour in the street during winter

A huge crowd of people arrived. Did they help? No they got their phones out to film.

Not one of them chose to call for medical help despite the poor woman pleading for help

Was that in Birmingham @Soubriquet?

Think I heard about that- (or possibly it was another similar event - which is doubly charming.

Original poster
MsStillwell · 30/10/2020 15:07

I don’t see the issue with it, and actually it can be quite beneficial. Nobody should be doing anything in public that they don’t mind others seeing anyway. You were very rude to try and police someone else’s behaviour with a pointed remark.

I appreciate you contributing an opposing view @emilyfrost

OP posts:
Original poster
MsStillwell · 30/10/2020 15:08

She doesn’t need to explain herself to you.

No, she didn't and I didn't ask her to.

OP posts:
Nostrings457 · 30/10/2020 15:09

Something as inconsequential as people arguing over £4 is being filmed for nothing but posting on social media for 'likes.'

Original poster
MsStillwell · 30/10/2020 15:09

And actually, I'll own this part. In filming the incident, she was filming me and the two men trying to help. And the thought went through my head how, as a middle-aged, over-weight woman, people on social media would comment on me too.

OP posts:
Confuzzlediddled · 30/10/2020 15:10

my Dad collapsed and died in a hotel in spain, in the corridor. they put screens around him and one of my mums most overriding memories is of people climbing on chairs so that they could film over the top of the screens. People are horrible.

Sparklesocks · 30/10/2020 15:11

@Confuzzlediddled that is appalling, I’m so sorry ❤️

Original poster
MsStillwell · 30/10/2020 15:11

I'm so sorry to hear the stories of people on the receiving end of this behaviour. These are horrible experiences to have to go through.

OP posts:
LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 30/10/2020 15:14

@emilyfrost

When I said I didn't think she should film it, she didn't say "I'll show the police when they get here".

She doesn’t need to explain herself to you.

In which case, nobody need explain themselves to anybody about anything... no matter how reprehensible the behaviour.

Filming somebody's distress, when it's nothing to do with you, is disgusting behaviour. I would also say something... why would anybody stand by and let that happen?

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 30/10/2020 15:16

@MsStillwell

And actually, I'll own this part. In filming the incident, she was filming me and the two men trying to help. And the thought went through my head how, as a middle-aged, over-weight woman, people on social media would comment on me too.
Well, low-lifes will say anything about anybody. Nobody with a functioning brain cell would think anything like that of you, would just be grateful that there are still people who are willing to help without needing to get 'likes' on a stupid social media site.
blueangel19 · 30/10/2020 15:22

I hope they make filming like that illegal. Do not care about witnesses because they can also be eye witnesses. In most cases is an invasion of privacy.