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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be anxious about toddler going from cot to bed

66 replies

pandarific · 29/10/2020 18:33

So, I'm worried about this. Almost 2yo is in a sleeping bag which he can't undo, and we have made the cot side higher so he can't get out (he is very very tall so had to raise it) which works well, as he's never been the 'just lie down and go to sleep' sort of baby, there is always a lot of rolling around and messing with teddies etc before he goes off.

He is a good sleeper when he actually goes to sleep, but currently we sit with him at bedtime as he goes to sleep in the cot, though we're slowly weaning him onto being okay with us leaving the room, when he just rolls around in the cot and eventually goes to sleep.

However, I'm worried about:

  • naps. He's not ready to drop the nap but already throws a strop sometimes at having to go down, and if he's not contained I'm worried he'll just be running all over the place and it will be a nightmare
  • he often wakes at 6am and has a little grumble, but we listen out and he usually just rolls around a bit and goes back to sleep until 7:30. If he's not contained, again, I'm worried he'll just get up at 6 and I'd really rather he not!
  • won't he just get out of bed all the time? My friend has her toddler same age in a toddler bed and he can climb over the gate on his door and has gone from being in bed at 7 to 9 / 9:30 with constant getting up, messing around and I'm just dreading it

Could really do with some practical advice, especially as we have a new baby due March and I'd like him to be settled into the new routine before things are unsettled for him. Any thoughts?

OP posts:
pandarific · 29/10/2020 19:44

Amazing tip, thanks @Flev

OP posts:
RandomMess · 29/10/2020 19:46

You put the nappy pin around the back so they are impossible to reach

SqidgeBum · 29/10/2020 19:48

We moved our nearly 2 year old into a toddler bed around 2 months ago. I am due a baby on Monday. I was very freaked about her being able to wander around etc. Turned out, she doesnt move! She took to it like a duck to water. We sat outside the room waiting for the fallout on night one but it never arrived. She just went to sleep, not a single moan or fuss. She does roll out of the bed a lot but we have her in a floor bed so she is fine. we just pop her back in before we go to bed. We did child proof the room, so all furniture bolted to the wall, no wires accessible, and there are no toys. She just has some books. We also put a childgate on the door of the room and we did have her sleep in the room in a cot for a while before taking her out of the cot. We showed her how to lie down in the bed, head on the pillow etc for a few days before.

Honestly, it may be worse in your head than in reality. We have had absolutely no issues whatsoever.

Thereareliterallynonamesleft · 29/10/2020 19:52

We transferred to a toddler bed at 22 months cos he could climb out of the cot. I’ve heard that sleeping bags can be dangerous once they want to climb etc cos they could try to stand up and then trip/bump themselves, but don’t know if that’s true. Re the stair gate, my son is now 2 and 4 months, he can open the stair gate but only recently, but at least I hear if he does it. You could try a stair gate and see how long it takes him to work it out... or he might not be able to reach the door handle anyway.

Thereareliterallynonamesleft · 29/10/2020 19:54

We also set up the toddler bed in the same room for a few days before the switch, got him to sit in it, tuck teddy in, say goodnight teddy etc so it wasn’t a complete shock.

pandarific · 29/10/2020 19:57

Just tried inside out, little sod has got it open SHIT

OP posts:
NameChange30 · 29/10/2020 19:59

If he can escape a sleeping bag and climb out of the cot, it's definitely time to move him into a bed. You could get a toddler bed or just straight to a (low) single bed with a bed rail.

Flev · 29/10/2020 19:59

Oh bother, sorry to hear that. Completely sew up the closure? (obviously not a quick fix for tonight)

Thereareliterallynonamesleft · 29/10/2020 20:00

What position does he normally sleep in? I stopped using sleeping bags around 9 months I think, once mine started to crawl they liked to sleep on their fronts with their knees tucked under them. He might find the sleeping bag a bit restrictive and struggle to get comfortable. Or he might just be trying to escape! Grin

RandomMess · 29/10/2020 20:01

We took one side off the cot to turn into a bed, may depend on how strudy your cot is though

happymummy12345 · 29/10/2020 20:01

My son went in a toddler bed at 17 months. He was fine. We had a gate at his door to keep him safe. He loved it and was fine. Tbh I was happier when he was in the bed

pandarific · 29/10/2020 20:02

Yes, but then what do we do about all of the potential issues I outlined in my main post? I don't want him to stop sleeping!

I just tried him in a backwards one and I don't think he can get out, though he's trying... cautious optimism.

OP posts:
SqidgeBum · 29/10/2020 20:07

Have you ever tried him without a sleeping bag before OP? Why does he need to be in a sleeping bag?

Ratatcat · 29/10/2020 20:08

We didn’t take the sides off mine until 3 ish I think and she was a complete pain in the arse. I wouldn’t have fancied it at 2. She did have a phase of cot jumping really early but once we reversed the sleeping bag she couldn’t do it and gave up. She also had a phase of sleep walking a few months after the bars coming off. It terrified us to see her turn up downstairs completely out of it. That was a fun few months.... basically number 2 is saying in a cot as long as possible.

mamaof2girls · 29/10/2020 20:11

18 months here when taking little one side off the cot bed off. She doesn't have toys in her room just teddy's witch wasn't a problem. Yea she did wander round the room in and out wardrobes (built in so couldn't tip anything) we left her to it sometimes and every now and again put her back in bed instead off going in every single time. Sometimes to start with she would be in bed asleep others on the floor. But she's not 2 next month and when she goes into bed she plays with her teddy's in bed (witch doesn't bother me)doesn't get out off bed atall and even in the morning she doesn't get off the bed till I get her. So they get use to it. I had baby number 2 in May so thats the reason I moved her from cot to bed. 2 months ago I bought her a new big girls bed from IKEA witch has high sides and she doesn't even fall out the bed or anything and she moves and rolls about like mad at night! X

byvirtue · 29/10/2020 20:11

Have some faith, moving to a bed is natural progression, you might have a few days where they get out but maintain your routine and put him back in to bed immediately and he will transition. I used a sleeping bag for a while but quickly transitioned to duvet etc. Use a single duvet cover on a toddler duvet and there is lots extra to tuck in so it’s much harder for them to pull out.

pandarific · 29/10/2020 20:13

@SqidgeBum because he can climb out of the cot if he's not in a sleeping bag.

He thinks it's hilarious, and if he can get out of the cot just keeps getting out. MIL had it with her cot this week, he didn't nap and my DH had to pick him up early because she was shattered.

He has now given up trying to get the backwards opening one open (can't, muahahaha ds I have outsmarted you) and is asleep. Thank god - and you all for that tip.

OP posts:
cazinge · 29/10/2020 20:17

I didnt moved DS until after the baby arrived, he was just over 2. Partly this was because of lockdown delaying the delivery of his bed, partly me dreading the transition. He doesn't nap so I have no advice on that front.

We have...

  • Door with turn handle which he can't open (was already here, planned to change doors then decided it might be best to leave it!)
  • Stairgate outside door (just in case)
  • Battery powered equivalent of gro clock which changes colour blue / yellow

It really has been ok. Occasional bad bedtimes (crying rather than getting out) and the odd early morning but we have coped. Consistency about being firm and replacing/telling to go back to sleep has helped I think and this is a child who does not sit still from waking!

Elletine · 29/10/2020 20:36

Try it out one night and see.... we moved our 22 month old recently and put a stair gate on his bedroom door so he can get up if he wants but he can’t roam the house/ tackle the stairs/ flush himself down the bog.

I expected it to be like supernanny carting him back and forth to bed but he got the message and sleeps better in his junior bed than he did in his cot... if your chap isn’t ready pop him back in the cot and try again in a few weeks?

Does he nap in the buggy? That’s my solution until mine drops his nap...... (dreading that)

pandarific · 01/11/2020 15:03

He has just been SUCH a little shit. He has refused to nap, been bouncing around in his cot for two fucking hours laughing and getting in and out and messing.

For fucks fucking sake. The little fucker had a lovely morning with me too, and now I honestly just want to slap him. I have not - Dh is with him now as I'm just too pissed off.

Searching for a fucking toddler bed now, because there's no bloody point in the cot as he can now climb out in his sleeping bag. YAY! What a great day.

OP posts:
NameChange30 · 01/11/2020 15:05
Confused
pandarific · 01/11/2020 15:08

I don't slap, to be clear. But arrrrrrrgggggggghhhh.

OP posts:
Carrotcakey · 01/11/2020 15:39

I think you’ve been reading too many mum blogs. People don’t talk like that in real life without coming across as try hards that actually dislike their kids.

Get the bed. I’m sure it will be fine.

pandarific · 01/11/2020 15:52

Point taken about being a bitch, but it's not real life is it? It's the internet. I'm glad for you if you are never driven to fits of incandescent rage by your children, but after 2 hours of defiance I have a little swear on the internet.

I'm sure you're right and it will all be fine. I'm just catastrophising.

OP posts:
NameChange30 · 01/11/2020 15:53

I mean, we've all been there. We've all had a frustrated moment and thought "little shit" or "fucker" in our heads... but at some point in between thinking it and writing it in a mumsnet post, I think I'd stop myself.

Sorry OP but if you're getting this angry then I think it's a sign you need to take care of yourself a bit more.

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