To let one teeny covid rule stop me joking this gym?

[Johnmenses]

I have very very low self esteem.

I'm suffering low mental health at the moment. And I'm not fit. I'm dissatisfied with how I live my lazy life. I'm coming up to 50, I'd like to embark on a programme of self improvement.

I'm very tempted to join a local gym/spa at the local hotel. I could probably go a couple of times a week - it's 72£ pcm so not cheap but I think that'll make me obliged to go.

The covid rule is yiu should arrive/leave for gym sessions in gum gear. But if you're using hydro suite, then obviously you can change out of wet costume. I understand it's to minimise risk in changing room and am completely on board with that.

I was planning on mostly using hydro but wanted to gird my lions abd start classes etc as my confidence grew.

The idea of being out in public in gymwear is really scaring me. There's no way I could do that.

Am I being a wimp for letting this stop me?

[EmmaGrundyForPM]

Seriously. nobody cares what you look like in gym gear.

That may well be true but when you've got low self esteem it's very difficult to feel ok about wearing gym wear in public.

[Johnmenses]

The thought of being g out in public in trackies abd hoody is giving me palpitations right now.

I need to cover up on my normal clothes in public. There's no way I'd wall from my house to my car in anything else.

Yes I have issues. I'm trying to deal with these demons. But it appears a small hurdle is enough to stop me.

Yes the changing rooms are open, for use after before swimming costume activists

[Lovemusic33]

I never change at the gym, don’t care what I look like 🤣🤣

But YABU to pay £75 a month, the highest package at my gym is £40 which includes pool, gym and classes.

Don’t worry about what you look like, no one really notices or cares, I just wear leggings and a baggy t-shirt when I’m at my heaviest.

[Jux]

Big coat is fine if you're going to Lidl after, and winter's coming on so you'd want to wear one anyway.

Where else would you be going after the gym? Round to a friend's? To the pub? A club of some sort?

[Saucery]

If it worries you, it worries you. All the people in the world telling you no one else cares isn’t going to mean a thing to you if it’s that deeply embedded in your psyche.

I assume you are allowed to use the toilets at the gym? Could you do a quick change in there on your way out? I would find that less Covid secure though, tbh.

Only alternative is home workouts, really, isn’t it, unless there is another gym in the area that allows a change in cubicles or the toilets?

[Saucery]

Here’s my “OMG EVERYONE IS LOOKING AT ME!” story, anyway.
I was running on my own and a car slowed down up ahead. I thought “Oh shit!” and as I ran past I heard “Oi, oi!” sort of shouting.
I thought, right I am NOT putting up with this and half turned to give them a piece of my mind for judging me. Then I saw a couple of men across the road. Who the occupants of the car were calling out to as they obviously knew them. I hadn’t even registered to them and they weren’t catcalling me at all

[Heyahun]

literally not a single person will even notice you or what you are wearing? who are you afraid will see you??

kind of sounds like you are making further excuses to not go to the gym tbh

do home workouts if your afraid to leave the house in gym gear maybe?

ALSO - why is that gym so expensive??

[Johnmenses]

Heya. Okay full disclosure. I lost 9 stone in 2 years through addressing eating alone.

I've put 2 stone back on. I need to lose about 4 stone more yo get into realms of a normal range. Im trying to brave it out and get my body seen in a place where there are people is hard enough, but hopefully some will not judge bc of ability to see why I'm out at a gym. Out in the public, I feel that compassion will be lacking. I'm not that brave.

The shape of my body is fucked

[emmathedilemma]

So you'll be going to the gym in the car? Then surely no one is really going to see you?
That gym is on a par with what I pay for gym, pool and classes, any time access.

[Heyahun]

i've never seen anyone be judgmental at a gym in my life tbh!! It is all in your head this fear that people go around slagging people off and judging - when in reality the likelihood of anyone having anything to say about what you look like is miniscule!!

[JoeCalFuckingZaghe]

What is the major difference between your gym clothes and what you will be wearing before / after (your normal clothes?). Honestly you'd be surprised how trendy gym clothes are now, a lot of people just wear them as comfy clothes to pop to the shops etc in. Can you get some black sports leggings and take a casual comfy dress to just shove on over the top of the leggings? It would just look like leggings and a dress then? Maybe build up like that until you're fully in gym clothes? Or can you change in a toilet if you can't use the changing rooms?

[Gwenhwyfar]

Everyone saying to wear a dress/jeans over it - how would that be different from changing at the gym?
Coat seems to be the easiest.
Also, gym trousers can be tracksuit bottoms, don't have to be leggings.

[Sheeplife]

The thought of being g out in public in trackies abd hoody is giving me palpitations right now.
No one will give a second glance to someone in hoodie and tracksuit, I know you don't like the shape of your body but no one else will look or care. I struggle with anxiety and body image too but starting to come to terms with the fact no one cares but me! Go to the gym it will make you feel better even if it's tough for the first couple of goes in the gym wear

[Gwenhwyfar]

Sorry, missed that you're worried about tracksuits as well. Why is that OP?

[YouokHun]

If your goal is to join and go to the gym regularly why not sit down and list the things that are stopping you? Then take each concern and examine it. Is there a theme to your anxious thoughts, for example the judgement of others? You might benefit from CBT just to help you identify the thinking that is stopping you from fulfilling your goals and it will help you change your behaviour and manage your avoidance. The reality is that other people are FAR too busy thinking of themselves to think about what you’re wearing or what you look like but if you avoid going out in your gym gear you’re never going to recognise this (and other realities). Perhaps you should embark not on a programme of self-improvement but on a programme of self care which includes work on accepting yourself as you are today and working out how you can approach things differently. It’s worth looking on the www.cbtregisteruk.com/ for properly accredited CBT therapists who could help you tackle your anxiety or refer yourself to IAPT for NHS CBT (possibly a long wait though). It’s all online at the moment but it could be very helpful.

[YouokHun]

Sorry @Johnmenses I spent ages typing my post above and you’ve since updated. I think some structures therapy such as CBT could really be of help.

[LividLaughLurve]

I’m pretty lardy and look great in gym gear

[Weatherwax]

I went to the gym yesterday and I couldn't tell you what anyone else there wore, or what shape they were. I did my workout and left. I can barely remember what kit I wore! Please dig deep and try going once. The first time is the hardest. It can only get easier after that.

[Terrace58]

If you are doing the gym right, you are going to want to go home after to shower.



We all have our quirks, so I don’t want to tell you that your being ridiculous, but you really are. You are going to be seen by a bunch of strangers in the same sort of clothing plenty of people wear out on public on a regular basis.

[nosswith]

The big coat seems a good idea.

[Saucery]

Do you follow This Girl Can on FB at all, @Johnmenses ?
I know you’re not going to look at all the women on there and immediately feel better about your body, but it shows the range of body types and how women can just get out there and bloody do it. “Take me as I am, or watch me as I go”.

[MsStillwell]

What would you normally wear out and about OP? Also, where will you be going afterwards that you're worried about? I'm thinking perhaps we can suggest clothes that will be both your style and suitable for your post-gym destination.

[alloutofducks]

OP, I had the same conversation with one of my DC who was very self-conscious about being seen in public in gym gear.

I said to her, and I'll say to you, that I promise you that nobody will even notice what you are wearing. Everyone is so busy worrying about their own business that they really and truly won't worry about yours.

And in the very, very, very unlikely instance of anyone looking askance, that would make them a complete dick.