AIBU to Expect Dinner Cooked for Me?

[lealea6366]

I haven't worked full time since my DC were born 20 year ago. My DH pays me $xxx to buy groceries, pay my bills, petrol etc. He expects dinner on the table most nights of the week and I'm happy to do that. I don't work full time, just a few days here and there when someone has a day off, I fill in. I've currently got 3 full weeks of work, working 6 days a week, only getting Sunday off. I told DH a few weeks ago, if I'm working long hours, 8 am til anywhere between 4pm-6:30pm, I expect to have dinner ready for me for a change. He gets home every day by 3:30pm. I'm only 5 days into the job and so far he has not had anything cooked for anyone, much less for me. He did get dinner ready tonight, Tacos, he knows I absolutely hate tacos. DH gets his own dinner but doesn't bother with anyone else. AIBU here? In his mind, he pays me so I should do for him. I don't have any savings in the bank so accept all the work I can get, with Christmas coming up, this little bit of work is very appreciated and needed. I just want a nice meal at the end of the day. Is that too much to ask?

She says she hasn’t worked full time. Not that she’s been a SAHM. And at the moment she’s working 6 full days a week, not sitting around with her feet up.

You have a weird 1950s setup/attitude, OP. He doesn't "pay you" to buy groceries etc. he gives you his share of money to pay bills. All the idiots telling you that he has been supporting all these years seem to have missed the fact that you do have a job and you have been bringing up DCs.

Now that you are both working full time, the house work needs to be split evenly so that you both have the same amount of free time. Most people would take it in turns to cook the evening meal if they are both working unless one person gets home really late.4- 6:30 PM is not late.

If he is working full time too, then you can both cook dinner together. Your attitude sounds like he should be greatful to you for working full time for a few weeks (in 20 years). His attitude is also awful for not giving you access to a joint account but instead is ’paying you’ for groceries and bills. Do you not hear how awful that sounds? I’d keep working full time if I were you, because you will have nothing if he decides to ditch you.

@Belladonna12

The op is only working for three weeks not permanently full time.

We also don’t know how old the DC are and it’s not a full time job being a SAHM indefinitely, if the dc are teenagers it’s not a full time role unless there are other circumstances like disability or a mansion to keep clean. For all we know they could be at university.

We also don’t know what the financial arrangements are, it could be OP gets Very generous housekeeping and plenty for personal spends or it may be that she is only paid £50 after bills.

@Dashel she said her dc were born 20 years ago.

OP obviously means long hours compared to her usual part time hours, not sure why everyone is jumping on that!

@Dashel she said her dc were born 20 years ago

All of them?

[quote Dashel]@Belladonna12

The op is only working for three weeks not permanently full time.

We also don’t know how old the DC are and it’s not a full time job being a SAHM indefinitely, if the dc are teenagers it’s not a full time role unless there are other circumstances like disability or a mansion to keep clean. For all we know they could be at university.

We also don’t know what the financial arrangements are, it could be OP gets Very generous housekeeping and plenty for personal spends or it may be that she is only paid £50 after bills.[/quote]
Yes, she clearly isn't permanently full-time. However, that doesn't mean she is a SAHM. Many people work part-time.

As for "generous housekeeping", the 1950s are calling.

He will actually make his own dinner but not yours or your children's? What a complete and utter selfish cunt

Pays you? Is your marriage certificate actually a contract of employment?

When circumstances change, as yours have, then everyone in the household needs to adapt to that change.
If he was my husband he would be lucky if I ever made him a sandwich again, much less a meal.

@cabbagevan

Wrong pic sorry

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