My child is a greedy pig. Is it my fault?

[Paddingtonjuice]

My 10 year old child is eating us out of house and home. I have always had a relaxed attitude to food but think I need to rethink now. 12 year old is great, just has his meals plus 1 bag of crisps per day, 1 penguin, plenty of fruit. Today 10 year old has eaten cereal for breakfast, tuns sandwich for lunch. Sausage, mash and vegetables for tea. Then while I have not been watching, 2 bags of monster munch, 4 lollipops that I had saved for Halloween, 3 ice lollies, 1 entire punnet of strawberries, 2 trios, 2 sausage rolls. 2 apples. About 6 crackers with butter. Then went to bed complaining they were hungry. This is not normal is it? They are actually skinny. Am I right in thinking they will overweight be soon if I don’t stop this?

The problem isn't her hunger, it is the thought sugar/crap will satisfy it.

Make meals more filling.

Always have a big pot/tub in the fridge of filling homemade soup available for anyone who is hungry to quickly heat up in the microwave (chicken and rice, lentil, split pea or scotch broth were the ones my mums made to keep a family of 5 going between meals). Filling and cheap!

I was a dainty four-foot-eight 10 year old and I grew into a dainty five-foor-one adult weighing in at seven and a half stone.

From the age of 11 I out-ate all the adults in the house. I stayed with my auntie for a week and she was shocked how much food I was putting away. But I was starving - I had five inches of height plus adult hips and boobs to put on. That takes serious amounts of food and yes calories.

Yes, your child needs to eat more. It's no wonder they're snacking on everything in sight, they need bigger meals and a lot more at breakfast and lunch especially. And proper filling snacks that that they can help themselves to if really hungry between meals - bananas, bowls of cereal and milk, bread and cheese, or whatever instead of sugary sweeties and junk.

Don’t ever call a person greedy or a pig or judge them for what they eat.

He needs more protein and veg to fill him up. Eggs are inexpensive as are beans and would make a better, more filling breakfast than cereal.

Finally, if you don’t have junk food in the house he can’t eat it. Just don’t buy it.

He’s clearly not overeating because he isn’t overweight.

We are going through something similar with my step daughter who is older (12) and overweight. Her dad wanted to say something to her directly, but I'm utterly paranoid about planting the seeds of an ED so asked him not to. If she was a healthy weight, like your DD, I'd just leave it be entirely (might be growth spurt or she just needs it). I've said to DP to bin all the junk he keeps buying (we do a big healthy shop, but he tops up with bargain pastries and other reduced-price crap he's picks up during the week as treats) and gradually replace it with healthier stuff. It's difficult though, because - same as adults - some kids are naturally inclined to limit treats like chocolate and some just aren't. She's not "greedy" though. A love of food is great. Balance her love of it with the healthy stuff. I've found Joe Wicks good on healthier snacks that don't leave you feeling deprived.

My ds is 12 and had eaten huge amounts for the past three years I'd say. He's not overweight.

Yesterday he had...

Breakfast... croissant, yoghurt, apple, drink.

Lunch...chicken, rice (one of those microwave sachets, had the whole thing) salad. Homemade cookie for pudding.

Dinner... McDonald's...nuggets, large fries, orange juice

Before bed, crackers, carrot batons, yoghurt, biscuit, bag of crisps, an orange

He also helped himself to other snacks throughout the day.

Surely children are supposed to have a "good appetite" I think some more protein wouldnt go amiss .Say Boiled eggs for Breakfast , a jacket potato with Cheese or Beans and a hot filling meal ,maybe Casserole ,or a roast Chicken with Roasties and lots of veg .might fill them up a bit more!

@QueSera

That doesn't actually sound like much food to me! Child may be having a growth spurt; plus kids just burn energy like mad. Provide healthier options (eg toast and peanut butter), but it doesn't sound like a problem to me. 'Greedy pig' is a horrible way to speak about your DC who isn't actually eating much, I feel sad for your DC if this is your attitude to them, and to food, I think you need to do some self-reflection.

Toast/bagel with peanut butter is good.

For a treat breakfast I often have wholemeal bagel half with marmite or peanut butter and half with golden syrup.

I also used to have huge sandwiches with Mighty White bread with cheese and salad for lunch. and cream crackers, cheddar cheese and baby tomatoes for late night snack.

You could also look into healthy baking on BBC good food website, savoury muffins, flapjacks etc. just ration the amout they can eat but control what they put into it - e.g. fruit.

Peanut butter on apples another good snack. Rice cakes with spread on top?

@Amber0685

OP you would not believe the amount of junk I ate growing up. My sister and I used to love eating. We have always been slim, but eat a bit less junk food these days!

Saying that a family friend with 3 DDs - (single dad) tended to cook them curries with rice and let them snack on crisps etc.

DDs now 14, 16 and 18 and they do tend to be on chubby side but slimmed down a bit by putting more fruit and veg available and less crisps.

When I was a teen I walked a lot - at least 20 minutes and back to school and around the area, always playing in playground up til 13/14 and we did do quite a bit of sport - I'm not sporty really. I swam at weekends for pleasure though. We would always walk the 10 minutes to the shops up the road not get the bus etc. Not that there was a direct bus which there is now!

The issue I'd be looking at is them helping themselves. That's a no in our house.

DS (16) had eight slices of bread with some soup. He is skinny. I would feel utterly sick if I had that much!

It appears that the "greedy pig DH" troll is a bit bored today.

I ate tons as a teen. I had a Saturday job. Had a big breakfast, a pasty for break. Big sandwich and chips followed by a cream cake. Had tea at home. Maybe takeaway when out with mates later and toast before bed! Was skinny as a rake.

"The issue I'd be looking at is them helping themselves. That's a no in our house."

Why? That hardly encourages intuitive eating. Unless you are skint there is no excuse.

@PrincessBuggerPants

"The issue I'd be looking at is them helping themselves. That's a no in our house."

Why? That hardly encourages intuitive eating. Unless you are skint there is no excuse.

I dont know about "intuitive eating" but if I let my kids have free reign of the snack cupboard they would fill up on cream crackers and cereal bars and then not eat the healthy meals I've spent time and money on.

I'd stock up on healthy foods it may be a growth spurt or boredom. Many obese adults were slim DC.

YABU for calling your child a greedy pig.

@Nancydrawn

I think that's a really shitty way to talk about your kid.

This.

Sounds like a growth spurt.

OP only posted a clutch of times within the hour between midnight and 1am... possibly best to stop feeding things that are only out just after midnight...

At a bit of tangent here, but when DD was in SCBU (born 8 weeks early weighing 3lbs) and eventually started feeding well after being tube fed for 6 weeks and having constant feeding problems, I came in one day to be told by a nurse that she was a "greedy pig".

Children need food when they are growing, and more when they are having growth spurts. My DS has days when he seems to eat non-stop in the evenings but he is growing a lot just now and very active. The thing is to try to ensure that the food is as healthy as possible which to my mind means whole foods as far as possible and plenty (in our case, veggie) protein.

@PussGirl

What is a "lunchtime chocolate biscuit"?

It's not essential to eat stuff like this.

I'm not altogether sure about that but my guess is that it is some type of baked sweet dough, perhaps circular, coated with a substance derived from the cacao plant and eaten between the hours of 12:00 and 14:00.

I'm not altogether sure about that but my guess is that it is some type of baked sweet dough, perhaps circular, coated with a substance derived from the cacao plant and eaten between the hours of 12:00 and 14:00.

I remember coming home from school one day when I was about 12, heating a frozen pizza and eating it just as a 5pm snack, and then having dinner as normal 🤷🏼‍♀️ I was skinny as well and my appetite finally settled later on.

@UntilYourNextHairBrainedScheme

OP only posted a clutch of times within the hour between midnight and 1am... possibly best to stop feeding things that are only out just after midnight...

That's what I was thinking too.

Sounds like growing pains and not enough food at meal times.

Bigger breakfast and lunch. Just a sandwich at lunch? No wonder they need the rest. And cereal isn't often very filling either to be honest. Bigger meals will help cut down on the snacking.