My child is a greedy pig. Is it my fault?

[Paddingtonjuice]

My 10 year old child is eating us out of house and home. I have always had a relaxed attitude to food but think I need to rethink now. 12 year old is great, just has his meals plus 1 bag of crisps per day, 1 penguin, plenty of fruit. Today 10 year old has eaten cereal for breakfast, tuns sandwich for lunch. Sausage, mash and vegetables for tea. Then while I have not been watching, 2 bags of monster munch, 4 lollipops that I had saved for Halloween, 3 ice lollies, 1 entire punnet of strawberries, 2 trios, 2 sausage rolls. 2 apples. About 6 crackers with butter. Then went to bed complaining they were hungry. This is not normal is it? They are actually skinny. Am I right in thinking they will overweight be soon if I don’t stop this?

The meals themselves don't sound very big. My 8 and 10 year olds (slim) eat cereal and toast for breakfast, for lunch they get a sandwich with cucumber/carrot/pepper or tomato plus either a cake bar or packet of crisps plus fruit, then they have an afternoon snack of either more fruit or a biscuit or breadsticks/houmous or cracker/cheese, then a main meal in the evening followed by yoghurt or fruit. If your DC is hungry after their main meals they are more likely to snack

@OwlOne

My dd 17 has got pretty fat. She wants to feel not just full but stuffed i think. Trying not to shame her. She has exams next year i hope. But threads started by posters saying it is abusive to let yr kids become overweight! Delusional judgement.

I'd buy her a gym membership if I were you. My mum bought me one when I was 17 and I loved it - I got really ill and needed to regain muscle mass afterwards. It was a good escape and helped with exam stress too.

Btw, i a.so agree that the snacks are crap. But then they are nit offered adequate foods during meal times either.

Protein is essential to keep blood sugar stable. And you also need enough food.
So I would

• add almond powder to the porridge and increase portion size.
• add food, any nutritious food!, to lunch. I can’t remember the last time my dcs were satisfied by a sandwich at lunch. Plus it misses all the vegs etc.. anyway. Add some dip with hummus, fruit, yogurt, a salad with beans/cheese cubes etc etc
• Snacks is one I have never managed to make ‘healthy’ as such. But you can’t go wrong by treating it as a meal tbh.
• sausage, mash and vegs isn’t great but not awful either. BUT how many sausages? Just one? How much vegetables are they eating etc....

Both of my Ds's eat like horses. I don't think there is an issue here. Probably a growth spurt? so maybe more protein, youghurts, cheese, chicken tikka. Also things like part baked french stick and a tin of tomato soup, baked beans on toast, grapes, tinned pineapple. Sometimes I literally couldn't get enough food into them!

@OwlOne, I’m afraid I don’t agree with you there. When children are getting overweight or obese, this is fully the parents responsibility.
With one canvea. I’m talking about CHILDREN, not teenagers.

Teenagers are facing very similar issues than adults have re diet plus you have the risk of developing eating disorders, esp in girls.
Parents still have the opportunity to influence though, starting with proposing balanced meals for the two meals they have at home. And have an array of snacks that are more suitable at home too.

After that, I would enrol a nutritionist, talk about food and support the teen to understand WHY they are eating so many crips/biscuits etc... Just like I would advice that for an adult btw.

I think your problem is that both breakfast and lunch are really insubstantial so your child is bound to get hungry during the day. Try to persuade them to have fruit and toast at breakfast time, if they're at home give them something cooked and more fruit at lunch time, and don't have crisps in the house.

Add more protein in. Especially at breakfast time. Cereal on its own leaves me starving.

The other morning I was in a rush and needed a quick breakfast so I had a single serving size pot of full fat Greek style yoghurt with a spoonful of seeds added. Was fine till lunch.

Following day I had two weetabix and a banana and was starving about an hour later.

So maybe add in a slice of cheese or a Babybel or a pot of yoghurt to the breakfast.

Oh gosh these foments!

Firstly you can be slim and unhealthy. Weight is just one POSSIBLE factor in health. Eating. What you want and being slim is no indication that your insides are healthy.

@Violetophelia, I fully agree (and I know some people would argue that you can be overweight and be healthy....)

I think a lot of the comments there are addressing the OP’s question which is that he is eating too much as in too many calories and therefore will be come overweight. Which is clearly not the case.

Btw cereals are a really crap choice for breakfast. They are full of sugar and will never keep anyone feeling full for very long.
Start swapping the cereal for something more nutritious. Eggs, Porridge, left overs from the night before.... I suspect you’ll already be on the right track.

The language you use is utterly abusive and will be carried by the child into adolescence, adulthood and old age and every time they lean over the toilet bowl and stick their fingers down their throat.

Don't have unsatisfying packaged/processed/high carb/low nutritional value stuff in the house if you don't want it eaten and provide more substantial breakfasts and lunches in the meantime.

From your other posts where you've alternatively referred to a DS and a DD of an approximate age (so I presume you're attempting to make it less identifying), I note that the dog is also so desperate for food, it has bitten the children to get some.

Are you deliberately restricting them all to a lower level than they need for some reason? Dysfunctional eating patterns of your own? And whilst the eldest has been easy to control, the younger one(s) and the dog just don't submit so easily?

I was the ‘greedy pig’ child. My thinner sisters were always marvellous. Your problem goes deeper than a kid eating a few extra chocolate biscuits. I have no idea where you should begin, other than to stop referring to your child as a ‘greedy pig’.

I agree with the others firstly in that its probably a growth spurt, secondly in that teens/pre teens eat a LOT and thirdly in that you're not feeding them the right types of food.

DS2 is a skinny thing and at 13 has overtaken his 15yo brother in height. Last night, having eaten well all day, he ate a roast dinner at 7pm- roast chicken, carrots, potatoes, broccoli and sweetcorn (adult sized portions) and then an hour later ate half a baguette for "supper".

Keep the junk locked up or hidden and so you are then in control of how much junk food he is consuming. Kids will eat their way through sweets and chocolate if they’re available. And put boundaries in place; eg if mine ate a full punnet of strawberries, I would have a word about having consideration for others in the family who would have liked some too. We could all be greedy pigs if the opportunity was there. That’s why I don’t keep chocolate in the house or I could easily plough through half a dozen bars of the stuff if I did. I have zero willpower when it comes to chocolate!

My brother was like this. Drove mum spare. Literally ate constantly. He was a tiny skinny little weed, very active with his sport and always on the move. As long as activity is happening and exercise and the food he's eating isn't shit ( our mum simply stopped buying crisps biscuits etc as he ate them all, and we weren't allowed sweets) he should be OK. My brother is now a average sized 48 year old and has never been overweight.

have their feet grown recently - check them?
but as pp have said reduce junk in house (hid what you have & ration) but let them have fruit & veg sticks

Can't believe you're being told to leave them to it! Leave them to eating sugary, salty crap?

They're obviously growing fast so give them more substantial main meals, plus some healthy snacks. Fruit of course, but also cereal bars, yogurts etc. Maybe a pudding like wholemeal apple crumble? Even a wholemeal peanut butter sandwich is healthier than lollipops.

I used to be like that as a child and looking back I was eating too much rubbish - absolutely tons of crisps plus sweets, cake etc - and not enough protein and vitamin-rich food. It would have been better if I'd snacked on hard boiled eggs, nuts, sardines on toast etc. My mother, to her credit, never, ever questioned the amount of food we ate and we're all slim adults with no hang-ups.

Definite growth spurt x

It sounds like you have bought them up to eat intuitively.

If they are eating when they are hungry, then that isn't greed. I wouldn't mess with it tbh, if its not broke don't fix it. However, I would work on your own apparent belief that eating junk food is 'greedy' but eating square meals is fine. You need to make healthier snacks available if that bothers you, but don't ban 'junk' food as that might undo your hard work.

"eating sugary, salty crap?"

@goldenharvest it is not a good idea to apportion moral values to food. It is just food. Stress over 'good' and 'bad' food is proven to lead to obesity.

Some children need lots. Plan three substantial meals and three substantial snacks, with some treats but more filling and nutritious. (Slices of apple with peanut butter, fruit smoothies with yoghurt mixed in, flapjacks, Weetabix, porridge, hard boiled eggs, dried fruit and nuts, toast, crumpets, wrap with soft cheese etc).

To call your child greedy is quite hurtful.
They are maybe on a growth spurt.
Restrict the type of food available.
Leave fruit and veg snacks out.
A nice low sugar juice or squash drink. Obviously water is best But I appreciate how difficult it can be as a alternative to eat something.
This works for my dd - I say drink first, your tummy doesn’t know if you are hungry or thirsty.

I can’t imagine ever calling my child such a horrible name.

If they’re skinny - leave it. You’ll give them food issues if you make a big deal of this.

Most ten year olds grow loads and run about, so won’t get fat.

If you know your child is a snacker just make sure you don’t have crisps and sweets in the house - instead have yoghurts, fruit, veg, cheese, nuts and maybe the odd cake etc as a treat- but don’t allow daily lollipops etc, they’ll rot their teeth.