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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Trigger warning to think it’s cruel

63 replies

honeycomb129 · 23/10/2020 17:56

I’m in hospital after having a missed miscarriage and I had medical intervention which has now caused me to lose to much blood and now due to blood loss I’ve got acute kidney injury but the cruel part is they’ve put me on a ward surrounded by pregnant women with healthy babies all I hear is babies heartbeats on the ecg monitor and a lady next to me who’s pregnant keep talking about how excited she is and I’m sat here going through this I just think they could have put me on another ward surround gynaecologist problems and not pregnancy

OP posts:

MiddleClassMother · 23/10/2020 22:49

That's so dreadful. Please complain and ask to be moved. You've been through enough without having to deal with this. Hope you have a speedy recovery so you can get out of there quickly x

SuzieQQQ · 24/10/2020 09:16

That is awful and completely inappropriate for you to be there. They can swap you if there are no beds. It wouldn’t be hard at all.

Asterion · 24/10/2020 09:18

I'm so sorry you're going through this

I guess hospitals aren't working under normal conditions, but it must be so painful for you.

Salamander91 · 24/10/2020 09:31

I'm so sorry. That is cruel when I had my MC surgery I was put on the gynae ward.

onlie · 24/10/2020 09:41

I feel for you op.
I had to give birth around 21 weeks.. knowing that the baby wouldn't survive very long. And as I'm watching my little baby moving around, I could hear women in the rooms next to me giving birth, loud cheers and babies crying. It was surreal.

I think a lot of it is due to lack of space/beds

I'm sorry you have to go through this

YukoandHiro · 24/10/2020 09:43

I agree it's horrible. I had an induced labour a couple of weeks ago and was put on a ward next to a woman who has having a severe late bleed and they were uncertain of the outcome. They put her next to me where she could hear the heartbeat on my
Monitor and also me breathing through early labour pains. I felt awful for her and tried to keep as quiet as possible - just not fair!

laundryelf · 24/10/2020 09:53

So pleased that you were moved but angry this is still happening. In 2001 I was sent from a hospital appointment in one area for a scan to check miscarriage was complete as was still slight bleeding and had a positive pregnancy test. My husband waited in the waiting room with toddler DS as asked by nurse. So we thought it was a quick scan and return to see doctor again. Nurse took me to the scan area and said take a seat while she booked me in at reception, didn't return. I went round the corner to find a seat and it was full of pregnant women and partners waiting for their usual scan. I sat down and tried to control my crying as I waited for over an hour for my scan. Then the person doing the scan greeted me with when are you due? Hadn't read my notes.

It makes me really angry that that they lied to you, a side room was available, they could have moved you. This shouldn't still be happening! The lack of compassion in the NHS is awful in my unfortunately long and substantial experience. The times I or a family member have been treated with kindness are the exception rather than the rule.

Hope you get home soon and have a better experience in the future.

BritWifeinUSA · 24/10/2020 09:57

It’s very uncaring. Happened to me when I had an ectopic. I would have preferred to be on a gynae ward but I was on an ante-natal ward in a bay of 6. Five women all discussing names, comparing notes on their pregnancies and me with an ectopic that almost killed me. And that was after years of fertility treatment and it was an IVF pregnancy. I made no apologies for my wailing and crying.

billy1966 · 24/10/2020 10:02

You poor poor pet.

Frankly barbaric.

How unbelievably stressful for you.

So sorry for your loss.

MotherofTerriers · 24/10/2020 10:06

It happened to me 27 years ago. I was on a postnatal ward for a d&c after miscarriage. I told them if I miscarried again I would not seek medical help rather than go through that again. It was so cruel.

RandomMess · 24/10/2020 10:15

S111n20 · 24/10/2020 11:18

Checked this thread again this morning to see how you was op. So glad you have finally been moved. 💐

Mrsfussypants1 · 24/10/2020 11:30

I'm so sorry OP. I didn't think this was still happening, it brings back some horrible memories for me. I've never forgotten the nurses actions and words at the time and two years later being back on the same ward with our newborn daughter. I couldn't bring myself to join in with the NHS clap for covid. Nearly 30 years later I thought things would've changed.

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