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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To carry on as though I'm in a different tier because...

96 replies

GrootDeservedBetter · 23/10/2020 07:44

I (and I'm not exaggerating), live next door to the sign between a tier 1 and tier 2 area? And is anyone else in this situation where they literally live on the border?!

I've been visiting my mum who lives 5 minutes down the road on the 'tier 1 side' however, we (on the dark side of the sign!), have recently changed to tier 2 as it technically comes under another county.

The sign between the borders is literally no more than 2 metres from my front gate.

AIBU to still act as though I'm in tier 1 and see my mum? It seems stupid to me that because she lives on one side of a sign and I live on the other I can't see her now!

OP posts:
Itisbetter · 23/10/2020 09:02

I’d follow the rules in the area I’m in.

Heidi1976 · 23/10/2020 09:04

My husband's friend has children in Tier 1, but lives in Tier 3. He is still visiting them and will continue to.

Asterion · 23/10/2020 09:07

People saying "It's ridiculous" - should we all go into Tier 3 then? Because otherwise there will always be borders between tiers.

dolphinpose · 23/10/2020 09:08

The rules are insane. There is no logic to them, no genuine desire to work out the best way to protect the vulnerable and keep the country functioning. The rich and powerful do exactly as they please and ignore the rules they make for the rest. Do what you know is right for your family.

Springersrock · 23/10/2020 09:08

My mum has this too.

She lives rurally but the border runs along the middle of her road. People across the street are in tier 1, she’s in tier 2.

If you look at the local cases for her nearest town, they’ve had far fewer positives in October than I have in a tier 1 area

It does seem quite mad, but the border has to fall somewhere

BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze · 23/10/2020 09:11

Is your mum ok without visits? If she is then I wouldn’t visit and just phone, FaceTime etc.
If she’s very elderly, needs help, upset, very lonely etc then I would visit. Nothing to do with the sign.

RedskyAtnight · 23/10/2020 09:11

@Heidi1976

My husband's friend has children in Tier 1, but lives in Tier 3. He is still visiting them and will continue to.
That's allowed though? (it got a lot of press after Boris Johnson wrongly said that separated parents might not be able to see their children)
maddening · 23/10/2020 09:14

It is a hard one as Pragmatically your risk is the same as if you lived a couple of meters down so I voted Yanbu.

However, people are bending the rules whenever suits, someone in a tier 2 area should not be meeting people outside their household /bubble to play bingo indoors in tier one. I have a work colleague who is in tier 3 tell me they are travelling to a tier 2 area to meet their parents at a tourist attraction. Then it is no wonder that the rates are not decreasing quickly and the chance that we will still be living like this at Christmas is higher, if we pulled together we could possibly have a tier 1 Christmas across the country,.

jacks11 · 23/10/2020 09:20

So if you understand their has to be a boundary somewhere, your issue is that it is near you or don’t want it to apply to you? Who should it apply to then? Your neighbour, or only people a mile away from the boundary? Why should the rules not apply to you if applies to others? I think there is a lot what-about-ery applied to three restrictions. There are clear exceptions to the restrictions- e.g. if you need to enter someone’s house to provide care. The rules don’t only apply to you if you agree with them or find them easy.

I think the issue is that if we all decide our individual circumstances exempt us from whatever local restrictions are in place, what will that lead to? It might lead to wider spread of the virus and greater restrictions/more people ill and dying and greater economic damage. Or it might not do much. If we most of us take the risk that our assessment of the risks and which rules we can break with impunity is right and are wrong (which is likely, as we don’t have the data and most of us lack the knowledge of how make that assessment accurately, so most likely will breach the rules in order to do what we want, rather than having thought about it deeply- it’s human nature) the consequences could be profound.

On an individual level you might say “what the harm in...?”/ “I’m only just in the boundary for x restriction so I feel it is ok to do y” and you may have no impact. But we know, statistically , some people will. It’s hard because as an individual you feel you, personally, will have little impact. But the issue is that if everyone did as they pleased, then spread would be greater.

jacks11 · 23/10/2020 09:21

Three restrictions = these restrictions.

WithASpider · 23/10/2020 09:25

I'm in the same situation. Literally meters from a tier 1 area where our family and friends live, DC go to school, and I work.

We're following majority tier 2 rules. In your situation though I'd probably class it as a support bubble.

CatNoBag · 23/10/2020 09:26

If you're following the letter of the law, then I think it's perfectly fine for you to go into your Mums house as in England you're free to travel from one area to another, and then presumably once you do it's the rules for that area that apply. So you can travel from a Tier 3 area into a Tier 1 area and you're no longer in lockdown.

Which is a bit mental, but there we are...

itsgoodtobehome · 23/10/2020 09:28

I live in a Tier 1 area but work in a Tier 2 area. I'm still confused about what I am supposed to do!!

Comefromaway · 23/10/2020 09:28

There is one village near to me where there are some houses whose front door is in one tier and whose garden is in another tier!

Where the sign is located makes no difference though. it goes on your postcode/who you pay council tax to.

Genevieva · 23/10/2020 09:30

Do what you feel comfortable with. As far as I am concerned the current circumstances do not justify the removal of fundamental human rights and freedoms. If I was in a tier 2 place and was 'caught' visiting my elderly relatives then I would refuse to pay the fine and let them take me to court. It would be an interesting test case and am fairly sure the government would lose.

Acerred · 23/10/2020 09:33

@Comefromaway

There is one village near to me where there are some houses whose front door is in one tier and whose garden is in another tier!

Where the sign is located makes no difference though. it goes on your postcode/who you pay council tax to.

What if you have an English postcode and live in Wales ?! Grin
Lovemusic33 · 23/10/2020 09:36

The boundary has to be somewhere? You can’t keep moving it? There’s always going to be people living close to the boundary who feel it’s unfair?

tumpymummy · 23/10/2020 09:39

This whole tier system is rediculous anyway. Just do whatever you think is safest. We live in a tier 1 area, yet we are surrounded by students so the infection rate around us is really really high. But I'm not supposed to visit my mum in a tier 3 area who lives in a really quiet suburban part of town with low rates. How does that make sense?

decoraters · 23/10/2020 09:39

That's not really what I'm trying to say. Although yes I do think we've been wrongly classes as tier 2 personally, that wasn't what my original post was about.

I was asking if you personally would bother not seeing your mum because you lived 2 metres on the wrong side of a sign. I'm not asking about the officialness of it all, I understand that there has to be a border somewhere obviously.

I, and many others seem to have completely misunderstood your post then. Otherwise you have chosen to take what suits from responses. If you understand there has to be a border then you are able to understand you need to stay at the right side of yours.

Chestnutacorns123 · 23/10/2020 09:39

Interesting post. This is where the tier system falls down as its still not sophisticated enough. If you live in an area with low covid rates but are attached for government purposes to a town/city you acquire their rules. We are in Tier 3 but up until very recently our covid rates were 300 - 400 per 100000 ish lower than some of the areas near to us. We are a tourist area and were already busy but now we are Tier 3 only visitors from very high risk areas can visit, which they do in droves. Guess what are rates have doubled in the last week and we now have very high rates. I feel for those on borders but if you travel, mix etc the same will happen to where you live. I feel let down by the government as by making us tier 3 I believe they have exacerbated the situation where I live. If we'd been tier 2 those high risk individuals wouldn't have been coming.

BadTattoosAndSmellLikeBooze · 23/10/2020 09:40

If you're following the letter of the law, then I think it's perfectly fine for you to go into your Mums house as in England you're free to travel from one area to another, and then presumably once you do it's the rules for that area that apply. So you can travel from a Tier 3 area into a Tier 1 area and you're no longer in lockdown.

No, If you are in a tier 2 area and travel to a tier 1 area, then you still have to follow tier 2 rules.

Comefromaway · 23/10/2020 09:46

What if you have an English postcode and live in Wales ?!

Whether your postcode is English or Welsh makes no difference. Your postcode will tell you who you pay council tax to (is there a welsh equivalent?) That determines where you come under.

Acerred · 23/10/2020 09:47

@Comefromaway

What if you have an English postcode and live in Wales ?!

Whether your postcode is English or Welsh makes no difference. Your postcode will tell you who you pay council tax to (is there a welsh equivalent?) That determines where you come under.

I have an English address, an English postcode and pay council tax to a welsh council 😂
Comefromaway · 23/10/2020 09:48

In which case you come under Welsh rules.

Al1langdownthecleghole · 23/10/2020 09:50

If your Mum is working in Southend or Thurrock unitary authority areas I would err on the side of caution.

Politics aside (because ridiculous). The statistical risk in most of urban south essex is higher than in rural essex villages that happen to be in a tier 2 area.

I would be thinking what you both need to do to minimise your risk.