Am I the only person who thinks parents should feed their kids outside of school?

[HalloweenDoughnutAnyone]

Obviously it goes without saying I don't want any child to go hungry. But. Am I the only person who thinks parents should feed their kids outside of school?

Just that really.. it's free school dinners. Not free lunch all year round.

I don't understand why people think the tax payer should be paying even more? Maybe, if you can't afford to cover the basics (food and clothing) you should think twice before having a child?

Or should we extend free school dinners, to cover all the food a child needs inside and outside of school ?

I'm not tarring everyone with the same brush but I know people who rely on free school dinners. But have sky tv, expensive mobile contracts etc

They don't write it off though. They keep chasing you for it. And adding interest. And passing it to a collection agency. So no you don't technically have to pay it, but its pretty stressful never knowing if the knock on the door is a neighbour or a debt collector. And unless you're looking at their bank statements you don't know if the smartphone in their hand is on an expensive contract, an old hand me down on payg/Sim only or one they actually owe the provider a load of money on.

Are we back to the deserving and undeserving poor then?

Punishing a child for their parent's sin, nice.

@Madonnawiththebigboobies the alternative is hungry children. Is that what you want?

Now I know you'll post saying of course that's not what you want. But that is what will happen. You know this being so au fait with this situation. So one can only conclude that yes, you do what children going hungry. Nice.

*@caption. I am saying why is the government responsible for parents neglecting their children. Because that's what they are doing . I have been on my knees in the past. Have you ???

[quote Madonnawiththebigboobies]*@caption. I am saying why is the government responsible for parents neglecting their children. Because that's what they are doing . I have been on my knees in the past. Have you ??? [/quote]
Yep - fuck the children. Damn right.

It's amazing how many grown adults, mothers on this site, have an understanding of morality and ethics that never extended beyond the playground code of even-stevens. As worse, they hold it so close to their world view, they would see children hungry to defend it.

This thread really is quite a shocker.

My children are entitled to FSM.

When I had my first 2 children I was earning plenty as was my exP. I did not foresee the future, unfortunately, before having my amazing children. My exP became increasingly controlling and abusive, I eventually had a breakdown and tried to get him to leave. He raped me, I had a third child, because, yes, I chose to keep her.

But my mental health has suffered terribly and I have been off of work for a few years now, desperately wanting to get better. The NHS are unwilling to fund any further psychotherapy, even though my therapist recommended it. The drugs aren't working.

So financially we are struggling. Hb doesn't cover the rent. 2 of my children are diabetic and fussy eaters, so they can't have free school meals, even though entitled. So the vouchers have actually been the first time that theoretically we have received what we are entitled to and not had to scrimp so much. Except it has been really difficult to use the vouchers locally and I don't drive, and my food bill has increased a lot due to availability etc.

I would be happy to have rations tbh. A list of essentials exchanged for the vouchers specifically. What matters is that I can open the fridge and have milk and cheese and butter in there at least. Over lockdown there were some weeks where we couldn't.

Yes, it is my fault, I know that. I feel suitability shite in letting them down. But I have not seen evidence in my area of FSM parents living in excess. Not saying they don't exist, but it is a toxic assumption to stereotype FSM parents that way.

I genuinely hope that your lives never hit the fan as mine has. I genuinely am grateful for your tax money (I have paid that myself for the last 30 years). Take care x

The behaviour and priorities of the parent ARE NOT THE CHILDS FAULT

[quote Madonnawiththebigboobies]*@caption. I am saying why is the government responsible for parents neglecting their children. Because that's what they are doing . I have been on my knees in the past. Have you ??? [/quote]
What is the alternative?

Government and society has always been responsible for neglected children. That’s why social services exists.

That’s why things like SureStart, school nurture classes and the likes were invented. Because more normal people don’t simply think “well their parents should be doing it so fuck them” about children

@chickenyhead sorry to read your story. Try and see the majority good in the thread though if you can and keep reminding yourself there are far more people who would want your children to be supported then there are who would see your children go hungry. Also, those that take the opposing view just seem to suffer from a chronic lack of empathy. And intelligence, because sudden poverty can happen to anyone and it might just be them it comes for next. You can bet your bottom dollar their views would change at that point.

[quote Madonnawiththebigboobies]*@caption. I am saying why is the government responsible for parents neglecting their children. Because that's what they are doing . I have been on my knees in the past. Have you ??? [/quote]
And I'm saying that whether you think it shouldn't happen or not is irrelevant.

The fact is for a plethora of complicated reasons, some less noble than others, some parents WILL NOT provide food for their children. That's a fact whether you want it to be or not.

So I'm asking you, very clearly, are you advocating letting children go hungry?

Actually, scrap that. I'm telling you that you ARE advocating children going hungry.

So you think the punishment for neglectful adults should be taken by the vulnerable children in those circumstances through absolutely no fault of their own.

Surely the issue here isn't the parents. Its the fact that children affected by hunger cannot fend for themselves and solve that problem. So they're stuck hungry.

You need to read up about child hunger before you make such silly remarks op. Most child hunger has nothing to do with being working class or lazy parenting as you suggest.

@chickenyhead it is NOT your fault.

Forgive me for my opinions. The mumsnet demographic clearly know more than I do .

@Madonnawiththebigboobies

Forgive me for my opinions. The mumsnet demographic clearly know more than I do .

Glad you realise that.

@LuaDipa

And I wouldn’t want to be without Sky TV, a mobile phone or broadband when we are in the midst of a pandemic so I certainly wouldn’t begrudge another parent having it, however hard up they are. It’s like those with massive gardens wanting to report families who dared to use the park for anything other that a daily walk during lockdown.

I’m sorry, I agree with phone and broadband being practically essential nowadays, but sky tv?!!!

You can’t convince me on that, but maybe others will disagree.

So kids should go hungry because they have selfish parents? Ok then, as for not having kids if you can't afford them. Circumstances change especially now. Job losses, bereavement, divorce take your pick. Your attitude is precisely why the government will get away with doing as little as possible.

@Madonnawiththebigboobies

Forgive me for my opinions. The mumsnet demographic clearly know more than I do .

LOL. It's like reading the daily mail.

Spout some hateful, ill-informed shite and come back to valid debate with sOrRY FoR mY OpiNiOn.

You've at least acknowledged your willful ignorance though, so kudos for that. :)

@chickenyhead it is NOT your fault. And from one single parent with MH issues who desperately wishes they could work to another and (its homemade because I can afford to do that)

@chickenyhead

This thread really is quite a shocker.

My children are entitled to FSM.

When I had my first 2 children I was earning plenty as was my exP. I did not foresee the future, unfortunately, before having my amazing children. My exP became increasingly controlling and abusive, I eventually had a breakdown and tried to get him to leave. He raped me, I had a third child, because, yes, I chose to keep her.

But my mental health has suffered terribly and I have been off of work for a few years now, desperately wanting to get better. The NHS are unwilling to fund any further psychotherapy, even though my therapist recommended it. The drugs aren't working.

So financially we are struggling. Hb doesn't cover the rent. 2 of my children are diabetic and fussy eaters, so they can't have free school meals, even though entitled. So the vouchers have actually been the first time that theoretically we have received what we are entitled to and not had to scrimp so much. Except it has been really difficult to use the vouchers locally and I don't drive, and my food bill has increased a lot due to availability etc.

I would be happy to have rations tbh. A list of essentials exchanged for the vouchers specifically. What matters is that I can open the fridge and have milk and cheese and butter in there at least. Over lockdown there were some weeks where we couldn't.

Yes, it is my fault, I know that. I feel suitability shite in letting them down. But I have not seen evidence in my area of FSM parents living in excess. Not saying they don't exist, but it is a toxic assumption to stereotype FSM parents that way.

I genuinely hope that your lives never hit the fan as mine has. I genuinely am grateful for your tax money (I have paid that myself for the last 30 years). Take care x

I am so sorry you have had to deal with all that. You have absolutely nothing to apologise for and just ignore the selfish and hard of thinking people who make you feel that way. Good luck for the future.

I apologized because you are mostly clueless. Like I said I work with the demographic of people you are defending and I see the other side.. Again 70% are good parents . However and parents do exist and I'm not saying the children should suffer in the slightest . I am however saying the parents should be held accountable.

Also for those of you who are saying children should not go hungry because of parents spending, how many are you are in that situation?? Spending and taking of your child ? And yes we have the welfare state, surely to support us not to give us a free reign.

@Madonnawiththebigboobies

*@caption. I am saying why is the government responsible for parents neglecting their children. Because that's what they are doing . I have been on my knees in the past. Have you ???

I'm sorry, but you are focusing on your very narrow personal experience. Maybe you live in an area with adequate social housing, or an LHA rate close to actual private rental costs. However, many of us need to use £400 a month of our benefit money, just to top up the Hb. Before any other living expenses.

I hope that not all people who are supposed to help us during hardship share your opinions. Maybe the 30% benefit from social housing, so are already financially £400 better off. I don't know. But maybe you need to change job.

Thank you others for the flowers, although I don't deserve them. X

I didn't post flowers.