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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is too far to travel for a day trip?

159 replies

Blackcat1989 · 19/10/2020 10:27

Due to Covid DH’s family who live 4-5 hours away want to meet up but we’re trying to arrange to meet in the middle somewhere. They’ve found a national trust place that’s 2 hours 20 mins away. DH thinks that’s reasonable for a day and obviously we’d be returning the same distance later on. So over 4 hours of driving altogether.
I’m not sure what the alternative is at present except to not see them, but it feels like a lot of driving for one day. Thoughts?

OP posts:
KiposWonderbeasts · 19/10/2020 10:47

It's perfectly doable. YABU

Coffeeandcocopops · 19/10/2020 10:48

Not even worth posting about. Sounds like you don’t want to go.

SuzieQQQ · 19/10/2020 10:49

That’s fine. Not far army all

RightOnTheEdge · 19/10/2020 10:51

It depends on your family.
I have had terrible travel sickness all my life and sadly my dc have taken after me.
They would absolutely hate that, they hate going anywhere in the car. So would I as a passenger just for a few hours to then do it again on the way back.

Some children would be fine though and sleep or watch a film.
You probably have to do it if your DH really wants to see his family.

beansonbread · 19/10/2020 10:55

I go by the rule that as long as the time spent at the destination is over the travel time then I’m happy to do it.
So leave at 8, there by 10.30am. Spend some lovely time together, leave by 4 and home by 6.30pm. 5 and a half hours of time together and 5 hours travel - sounds fine to me.

RedskyAtnight · 19/10/2020 10:55

When DH's parents lived 2.5 hours away we used to do it as a day trip regularly. So I think it's doable but would be about my limit. If you're meeting at a NT place, your actual meeting won't be all day anyway - more like a few hours. And if you were going to their actual house you'd be spending that long in a car anyway just to get there!

CupidStunt2020 · 19/10/2020 10:57

That used to be my daily commute.

But should you really all be driving from different areas to meet up? Not really in the spirit of things, is it?

Triangularbubble · 19/10/2020 10:59

I have done that sort of thing for a day at a theme park or special attraction. A day at the beach from where we live probably takes that much driving too. So I don’t think it’s too far for a one off family meet up, although I wouldn’t want to do it every weekend.

Backtoreality1 · 19/10/2020 10:59

We did this with my brother and his kids. Yes its a long journey but at least it gives you some contact and its not like you are going to do it every week. I would go for it :)

JamminDoughnuts · 19/10/2020 11:01

do you have good cars?
have you checked the weather forecast?

ktp100 · 19/10/2020 11:03

That's fine for a day.

ChikiTIKI · 19/10/2020 11:07

It's alright. Remember to book entry for the NT place though.

hopefulhalf · 19/10/2020 11:07

My favourite expression here is " for the americans 200 years is a long time, for the brits 200 miles is a long way".
It depends on ;
How many drivers
Age of children if any
Comfort of vechicle
State of the roads

TheGinGenie · 19/10/2020 11:07

I'd find this reasonable but I live hours from anywhere so my sense of this is probably skewed!

CeramicGuineaPig · 19/10/2020 11:09

We have done that to see DH's family, once we became too big a family to stay over. I think it depends on how old your kids are (if you have any) and how well they travel. When mine were little they were very carsick and I was reluctant to put them through all that car time in one day, but now they are older it is fine. If you have no kids, I think it's absolutely fine.

EmilySpinach · 19/10/2020 11:11

Given how far away the family are I think it's reasonable. Share the driving and take a car picnic to eat on the way. If you have small children bring activities, iPads etc and try to time around their sleep, e.g. have a meal out before you leave (assuming covid restrictions allow) and bring blankets so they can fall asleep in the car.

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 19/10/2020 11:11

I used to to drive one and half hours to work and then back again every day. There were other people who did a similar daily journey.
So two and half hours each way to meet with the family would be perfectly reasonable to me. (Not every day though!)

Winter2020 · 19/10/2020 11:12

If you can afford it you could book a TraveLodge/ Premier Inn and make a little break out of it.

ThanksItHasPockets · 19/10/2020 11:13

If it's the only way to see his family you'll just have to make it work.

Mia1415 · 19/10/2020 11:16

That used to be my daily commute for a while. Perfectly doable. I've done many a day trip with 3-4 hour driving each way.

Toilenstripes · 19/10/2020 11:18

Unless it’s grandparents you haven’t seen for many months I’d say no. What is it with people so desperate to meet up when you know there’s this virus out there?

ChibiTotoro · 19/10/2020 11:28

That's a regular journey time for us to see family on a day trip.

Pootles34 · 19/10/2020 11:28

Yeah it's a pain but it's what we've been doing recently - IL's all live 3-5 hours away. Lots more national trust visits! We'll have to find some new places when they all close for the winter...

audweb · 19/10/2020 11:30

It’s not that far. All my family live roughly two hours away, and I’ve done that there and back in a day plenty times. I also have friends who live three hours away, and I’ve done that too. As a one off to catch up with people during these times, I think it’s reasonable.

Ponoka7 · 19/10/2020 11:33

We used to do Liverpool to Wales for a day trip. I've done Liverpool to Birmingham on the train for a Christmas day out. So I'd say that it is fine for a special day out.

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