To not pay for this training course for my DH?

[ChilledTomotoes]

My DH has been unemployed for nearly 4 years now due to health reasons (severe anxiety). He is now much better and has been looking for work.

He used to have a professional job in the NHS and earned a good salary. He’s adamant that he wants to get into project management and wants to do Prince2 training. He has no experience of project management really.

If he does the Prince2 he would still need to apply for trainee roles as he has no experience. But he thinks the qualification will help him get a job. Would it really though?

It would cost approx £500 and although I have the money, we have very minimal savings. I’m scared to lose this money on something which will have no real benefit.

On the other hand would it show he was really serious to employers?

AIBU - yes you should give him the money
UANBU - no he should get an entry level job first

Prince 2 qualified project manager (former) here - don't do the training yet. Start with a book like amazon.co.uk/dp/0992816335/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_btf_t1_vUdJFbZ5E5C9G]] and have a look at job opportunities locally where you can get involved in projects.

Coming from a clinical background, he may not have transferable skills for the kinds of ICT projects where Prince 2 is mostly used. And Prince is a heavily clerical methodology, which generally ends up being more about the paperwork than the process improvement. For that reason, working in a project or programme office is good exposure to the practices BUT it's been years since the majority of people saw project office as being a skill in its own right, so they generally get staffed with near-minimum-wage administrators plus a couple of consultants good with Excel and planning software.

He might be better off spending half a day with a careers advisor - who would also be able to advise him on a route into wherever he wants to go.

Well I know nothing about PM other than one module I did on it years ago at uni. But even I know that it's probably one of the last career someone with severe anxiety should be pursuing. So many deadlines, so many other people involved who can fuck something up and who won't care if it's YOUR head on the chopping block, so many highly pressurised situations where you'd have to deal with a sudden unexpected occurrence. The buck stops with you and no-one else.

There is a LOT of potential for his anxiety to flare up again with that career choice, I would have thought. Days absent from an important project due to anxiety would NOT be favourable for any career in PM.

He’d be better looking into Agile.

If he’s looking at Prince2 for it to be really valuable for employment purposes he’d need Practitioner, and I’m guessing he’s talking about Foundation here.

But nowadays employers are more interested in APM and Agile than Prince2, but beyond all of that they want experience; the qualifications don’t really get you far if you haven’t got experience to go with them. They might help you get in the door of an entry level position though.

It’s also an oversaturated market in several sectors at the moment. He’d be well-advised to do some research before committing money to courses.

I agree with the posts stating that your dh needs to get out there into the workplace again otherwise he’s just going to continue to be as anxious as he was before. Perhaps he will prove to have a flare for PM but o would be skeptical as it is is high stress. Right now he’s in a safe little bubble and you’re running yourself ragged to keep him there. The first thing for him is to do is to step out of the bubble.

I think MarriedtoDave and bored nailed it. He needs a job, any job and / or to volunteer to get the relevant experience. He also needs to start contributing and the first thing would be to give you something to look forward to like a break away by yourself. He seems to be forgetting you and your needs in all of this. Therapy is great. But no if the therapist is only encouraging selfishness as the client recovers.

www.futurelearn.com/subjects/business-and-management-courses/project-management
FutureLearn’s free courses might be worth a look.

Of course family money is joint money. That doesn't negate the need to spend wisely and carefully, regardless of who is the main earner.

Another here pointing out that PRINCE or and other methodology without real life experience is pointless and any reputable employer will send you on a course for which ever methodology they are using.

Project office roles may be a way in, but they tend to be very low paid. The suggestions up thread to follow up other non-clinical NHS roles, such as quality would be a better way forward.

I wouldn't pay for it under the circumstances. He's already sucked up all the family savings and extended family have had to help, too. Yes, he has anxiety, but you have 2 DCs to consider as well.

Tell him he needs to find a job and save up to do the course alongside it when he does if he thinks it will make him more appealing to employers going forward.

FTR, my DH has done the Prince 2 course. It won't get him hired without management experience. He needs to get a job.

Also - it does seem very cheap for P2. When I did it 10+ years ago it was well over £1,000. I remember it also being fairly full on (as a one week course) and quite stressful. It wouldn't be my first step back into the workplace post anxiety.

You can get a online only course (foundation and practitioner) with book and exams for around £500.

He needs to get a job, any job. Prince 2 won't help as a qualification without experience. Also you'd be foolish in my opinion to pay so much for a course when he has no experience of project management. He needs to find out if he enjoys it, is good at it and is suitable work for him as project management can be really stressful.

If I was doing another PM qualification I would focus on agile or APM - prince2 is quite old school now and has fallen out of favour in a lot of sectors. I personally prefer agile as a working methodology- if he looks at scrum for example he could look at the roles within and see if there is an area he’d like to focus. But experience is everything and the qualification will mean little without it (I wouldn’t hire on the basis of a qualification only especially for a career changer)

OK, I was wondering what kind of mental health issues your DH has, OP, so did a quick search, and discovered that it's OCD. Are you sure your DH has not chosen that career because he thinks it would be a way for him to have some control in his day to day working life? Because I think he might be mistaken.

Or if it manifests itself because he has obsessive thoughts & constantly thinking about something, then it could be the sort of job that could take over his life and all his waking thoughts, even when at home. Dwelling on every tiny little detail of a project CONSTANTLY.

As I said I have no experience of professional project management, but I just know how stressful project managing even an extension to our house was!! It consumes you, keeps you awake, you dream of things going wrong with the build, or get obsessed that you've made the wrong decision about something. Now imagine that times 100.

I really don't know if it's the right career choice for him......perhaps you need to get to the bottom of why he's decided he'd be so suitable for it.

“If he wants this he needs to do dog walking, child minding (plenty of demand) and anything he can to pay for it.”

Got to say, though, if my husband said this to me after a period of illness or unemployment, there would be serious words. Dog walking? He’s not a teenager. It’s family money.

Do you have a uni within commuting distance? Ours often as project assistant roles which would be a good foot in the door back to work and relevant experience before considering if it's really something he could do due to stress.

I’ve not read through everything but could it be a delaying tactic by him?

I have no experience of PM but I do with Anxiety and it is horrible. Why did he stop therapy? Has it helped him?
Aside, I think he needs to work first before doing another course as the result is the same for you - you are carrying the entire burden of the family.
If he really wants to PM there are probably loads of free online courses to study while he is working. 4 years is a long time for you to be carrying everything by yourself financially.

Even if you do have the money available, you also have the right to spend that on a break for the family.

My DH was talking about this and I said the same.

Just the qualification will not get you a job as a PM, you need experience.

In his case he is always casting around for some magical thing as he doesn't like his job but CBA really to look for a different one!

PM is stressful. Loads of people have prince 2, it seems devalued. Also I think it's a bit old hat now? Probably depends on what sort of sector he wants to go into. I'm in IT and it's all agile but I get the feeling that's getting a bit out of date... I reckon a new methodology around remote working will be the next fashion and we'll have to rejig everything again

I used to work as a PM in IT. It was a high stress job with tight deadlines.

NOT a job I'd recommend to someone who's been out for years with anxiety.

He needs to focus on just getting a job and keeping it, and learning to manage normal every day stresses in a work situation.

Then he can look for entry level PM roles, and those roles will pay for the courses if he's any good.

I wouldn't be forking out for it for someone with no job and no experience.

@flaviaritt

“If he wants this he needs to do dog walking, child minding (plenty of demand) and anything he can to pay for it.”

Got to say, though, if my husband said this to me after a period of illness or unemployment, there would be serious words. Dog walking? He’s not a teenager. It’s family money.

It might be family money but it's also not finite and his family deserve to be a bit more comfortable than at the end of their savings with nothing spare for extras. He's already used up over £400 of that family money, each month, on therapy.

It might be family money but it's also not finite and his family deserve to be a bit more comfortable than at the end of their savings with nothing spare for extras.

I’ve already said I don’t think they can afford it.

We’ve had another chat about it and I’ve said I think he needs to try and apply for entry level jobs first.

He’s gone into a bit of a strop now as he says there’s no chance of him getting a job blah blah blah. Tbh I’ve learnt to manage without his wage now and I’m planning to do things for ME for a change. He could apply for any job if he was serious about working, so I’m not going to feel guilty about this.

Oh and even though I’m at work all day and he’s at home, guess who still does the majority of the housework?

I’m doing a job which I don’t particularly enjoy because we need the money. I don’t see why it’s different for him.

Like many others have said, that seems very cheap for the full P2 qualification and, its only one methodology, it doesn't teach you how to be a PM.

I run a team of PM's - everyone wants to do it thinking its the 'sexy' job. Its not; its where the buck stops, you are liable, even legally, if things go wrong. Its primarily about communication and difficult communication when things start going wrong as can happen on every project. Many of the people who want to be a PM in my company hate it when they have done the training and then have to actually deliver. Good PM's are in a small, competitive, pool!

With anxiety, can he handle that?

Oh and even though I’m at work all day and he’s at home, guess who still does the majority of the housework

Puts a different complexion on things!

@Rotundandhappy

I’ve not read through everything but could it be a delaying tactic by him?

Good point

@ChilledTomotoes

We’ve had another chat about it and I’ve said I think he needs to try and apply for entry level jobs first.

He’s gone into a bit of a strop now as he says there’s no chance of him getting a job blah blah blah. Tbh I’ve learnt to manage without his wage now and I’m planning to do things for ME for a change. He could apply for any job if he was serious about working, so I’m not going to feel guilty about this.

Oh and even though I’m at work all day and he’s at home, guess who still does the majority of the housework?

I’m doing a job which I don’t particularly enjoy because we need the money. I don’t see why it’s different for him.

I would put that to him: "I'm at work all day, you're at home, and I'm still doing the majority of the housework. I'm doing a job I don't particularly enjoy because our FAMILY needs the money to live. I don't see why you think it should be different for you and you don't have to do your share around the house, especially when you're not working."

his answer will tell you whether he truly gives a shit about any of you and whether or not you should continue funding his shit.

Could he do a cheaper online course for project management (Reed, coursera etc) to support his reentry to the workforce and then fund the PRINCE2 course once in work (he may well get it funded for him?).

I’d also hesitate re funding a course as the trend at the moment is steering towards Agile - I keep my PRINCE2 up to date because I initially took it in 2006. However, I’ve needed to learn additional methodology such as Agile to keep up to date