AIBU to cackle suffocate you evil little creatures

[Sickoffamilydrama]

AIBU to cackle suffocate & die you little bastards as I treat DD hair for headlice...I'm sure they'll hear and any offspring left will be to traumatised from watching their parents/siblings die they won't come back 😉

I was unreasonable to not follow my own fucking rule which is that we always treat at least twice usually three times with the silicone based treatment as there's always so little offspring fucker probably hiding in a headlice bunker that survives the first cull and then breeds another army of the evil little bastards! This time we combed regularly and guess what she had an army of new borns in her hair today! > Not envy!!!

Anyway all I can say is fucking bastards

And AIBU for whispering to them suffocate you little fuckers.

In case anyone hasn't guessed this is a light hearted thread of me venting that I broke my own fucking rule and this is why for the last 10 years I've always repeated treatments!

There should have been a warning on that picture of head lice. Now itching AND squirming AND my flesh is crawling! Squeamish? Just a bit.😂😂😂😂😂

I guessed what you were referring to @Sickoffamilydrama just by the title of the thread!

I found popping them on a piece of kitchen roll after I'd cleaned them out of the comb VERY satisfying, there's a little pop sound ....

Can you do my cats fleas too? They keep coming back! Fucking irritating

@CrotchetyQuaver

I found popping them on a piece of kitchen roll after I'd cleaned them out of the comb VERY satisfying, there's a little pop sound ....

Yes although cringed as well and I've been a nurse and funeral director.

@Plussizejumpsuit the only obvious solution is to burn the house down....or Wilko flea spray and flea bombs I'm leaning towards burning the house down as the quicker and simpler option.

You lot are evil...

My mum used to crack the eggs between her fingernails to see if they were alive or dead. It was the one sick, small pleasure she got out of it all

@RandomMess

You lot are evil...

We aren't evil we are fighting against the enemy..they can take our scalps and suck our blood but they will never take our freedom 😁

What I want to know is who 👀 are these people who voted IABU come on admit it....who are the 5% that clearly love headlice because you need serious help.

I used to like watching the legs wiggling smothered in conditioner on a piece of kitchen roll...

The last time the dc had them, we put a couple under the microscope to have a look at them. I wouldn't recommend doing this. Some things are best left unknown.

The person who invents a spot-on treatment for lice will be a millionaire. Just think, a quick dab to the back of the neck, just like a cat, and the jobs done.

Cool im gonna go drink some wine

I did the mayonnaise treatment in desperation one year. It did work , but took ages to wash out . Guess it works on a smothering principle.

Don't even. I discovered DD had brought home whisper it threadworms from nursery this month and GIVEN THEM TO ME not envy! I have been in full on extermination mode ever since and they cannot die painfully enough for my liking, disgusting wriggly little bastards. Boak. I'd take headline any day!

I know I’m going to be flamed for saying this, but if parents didn’t set their DDs up to expect they should have impossibly long hair from toddlerhood then they might not have to spend so many hours combing the little bastards out.DS had them once, not sure how I got away with just the once, but it didn’t take me long to shampoo and comb them out of his short hair. I’m not saying girls need a short back and sides, but hair all down their backs’ is just ridiculous for a child, and if you set your DDs up with the expectation that that is how their hair is supposed to be then I have no sympathy with the hours you spend combing headlice out of it. Poor girls.

@Whatisthisfuckery

I know I’m going to be flamed for saying this, but if parents didn’t set their DDs up to expect they should have impossibly long hair from toddlerhood then they might not have to spend so many hours combing the little bastards out.DS had them once, not sure how I got away with just the once, but it didn’t take me long to shampoo and comb them out of his short hair. I’m not saying girls need a short back and sides, but hair all down their backs’ is just ridiculous for a child, and if you set your DDs up with the expectation that that is how their hair is supposed to be then I have no sympathy with the hours you spend combing headlice out of it. Poor girls.

Actually completely agree with you only problem is from very tiny I raised my daughters with bodily autonomy which means when I say let's cut it into a Bob they tell me my hair my choice. So basically I've now fucked myself over as there's no way I would cut it without their permission.

Unfortunately there's a social pressure for girls to have long hair, my DD who has autism particularly feels/notices it and gets quite paranoid about it all. She's just got used to my 70/80s style shag that might look a bit like a mullet if you squinted I've had done.

Anyway back to the light-hearted we have killed all the little buggers for the moment and I'll be suffocating any remainers on Saturday morning rubs hands in glee

You have all my sympathy...
I spent the first month of fucking lockdown treating and combing the fuckers. And again this week 😫
My daughter is an absolute magnet.
I repeat comb, and deal with them every time. But a few months later...

I never understand why people rave about the Nitty Gritty comb though. I can pull that through her hair and get nothing, then immediately after do the same with the comb from whatever box I have, and get loads. I find the tines too wideset.

As for hair straighteners and tea tree all and every other supposed cure-all?

Bollocks!

I rushed to open the thread and defend spiders, but as you were

@Cocomarine I'm wondering if you have a fake comb!!!

[quote RandomMess]@Cocomarine I'm wondering if you have a fake comb!!![/quote]
Interesting! I can’t remember where I bought it from... but it was ages ago and would have been most likely Boots. I definitely didn’t get it from somewhere you’d expect knock-off.

At first, I liked the more rounded tines - definitely hurt less. Then one day I was using the box one cos is left the Nitty Gritty somewhere the day before. It got LOADS more out. So I stopped and had a proper hunt around to compare at the same time. Nitty Gritty was rubbish!

Fucking nits. Fucking fuckers.

Can I also throw in that whilst it’s not her dad’s fault she gets them, she ALWAYS waits until she’s with me to mention, “could you have a check mum? I feel a bit itchy.” 😫

@stackemhigh no spiders were harmed in this thread 🕷️🕸️ equally curious how I could suffocate a spider not that I want to.. normally just Chuck them outside although perhaps we could retrain them to eat nits??? Might take some work though!

@Cocomarine I've found that too and will often use both the nitty gritty and the treatment comb so it's gets them no matter what.

I swear we got the 'one child in class got nits' email 10 minutes after school started again after summer...
some poor kids must be awfully riddled.

retrain spiders to eat nits

genious!

Don’t bother with treatments. Use a nitty gritty comb in conditioned hair daily until they’re gone then weekly to keep on top of.