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AIBU?

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Original poster

Contraception at 47

33 replies

Icantrememebrtheartist · 09/10/2020 20:53

Just weighing up contraception options. Had copper coils from 20 through to 39. Then had three children in my 40”s, last one at 45, so I’ve been blessed with good fertility. I don’t want hormone based contraception, I suffer with migraines and tbh feel too old (can’t be faffed) with taking the pill and I don’t want injections or implants. I don’t want a copper coil again, 20 years of horrendously heavy periods was enough. I’m toying with natural family planning ie tracking ovulation and using condoms during that window but not outside of that window.

In reality your chance of conceiving at 47 Is virtually zero isn’t it?

OP posts:
Wrenna · 09/10/2020 20:54

Dh get the snip?

Original poster
Icantrememebrtheartist · 09/10/2020 20:56

Yep that’s another option but I’m another one with a DH who seems to think it’s akin to having it chopped off.

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 09/10/2020 20:57

In reality your chance of conceiving at 47 Is virtually zero isn’t it?

If she were still alive, I'd have you talk to my great grandmother. She got pregnant at 49 and had the baby at 50.

Tubal ligation, I had one, or your husband gets the snip. It's the least he could do, after all.

Wrenna · 09/10/2020 20:57

Condoms then?

Serin · 09/10/2020 21:01

My friend is 53 and has a 5 year old.
I wouldnt say your chance of conceiving is impossible.
I convinced DH that the snip was the way forward. You have done your share of contraception.

zaphodbeeble · 09/10/2020 21:02

I use the pop, no periods for years

GilbertMarkham · 09/10/2020 21:02

If you had a baby at 45, I'd suspect you could be one of the outlier types who could get pregnant older than that.

My sister's running club buddy got pregnant at 47. Afaik she went full term and had baby.

A miscarriage might be more likely even if you were to; depends how upsetting etc you might find that.

I'd go tubal ligation (or tube removal which has a likely cancer risk reduction) esp if DH is disinclined to have vasectomy.

Kinkybutkind · 09/10/2020 21:03

I was refused tubal ligation at 44 because I was “practically menopausal and your risk of conceiving is very low”!!! Shock

I am too high risk for the pill

The mirena was pushed very hard but my last two coils for embedded where they shouldn’t. I absolutely do not want any more children - I’m currently waiting for a hysterectomy (for other reasons) and abstaining. I’m also now 47.

Emmapeeler2 · 09/10/2020 21:04

Um, I would have said unlikely but based on the above... plus do seem pretty fertile OP Smile

We use condoms for similar reasons.

Emmapeeler2 · 09/10/2020 21:04

you do!

GilbertMarkham · 09/10/2020 21:04

*I’m another one with a DH who seems to think it’s akin to having it chopped off."

Pretty darn selfish incidentally.

Pommes · 09/10/2020 21:05

A good friend had her DD at 47.

Pommes · 09/10/2020 21:06

You mentioned not wanting the copper coil, how about the mirena? I've heard it is often used for menopause symptoms too (not that you are anywhere near that...)

Waveysnail · 09/10/2020 21:45

Its thinking like that that causes these suprise babies for woman in their late 40, early 50s. Unless u want a baby then use protection.

MsRinky · 09/10/2020 21:46

I've been on the pop with no periods for years, but am nearly 48 and have just had an utterly relentless three weeks and counting period. Between that and my DH having had double hip-surgery this year, I don't feel like I'm going to need contraception any time soon or ever again. Ugh.

OoohTheStatsDontLie · 09/10/2020 22:02

If you've had a child at 45 I'd say ge chaced of getting pregnant at 47 are fairly high

Bootikin · 09/10/2020 22:39

FFS get your husband to have a vasectomy. Minor procedure for a mam as opposed to invasive / higher risk surgery for women.

It’s a sad indightment on U.K. / nhs that this isn’t the most obvious clear choice. Ignore horrendous / invasive coil options - other civilised nations have+low take up on these these for good reason. Find it staggering that U.K. women accept this.

Can’t beileive how U.K. still pushing women to take sole responsibility for contraception - it’s a sad insight into how sexist the U.K. is compared to say Sweden.

Shxx · 09/10/2020 22:46

im 32, barely used condoms during my teens to 20s and had multiply partners (being honest)
only got pregnant twice from my current bf two times in my 30s

be careful 40 is not old

Murinae · 09/10/2020 22:51

I’d go with the mirena coil. It worked well for me and no periods for years.

FrenchBoule · 09/10/2020 22:57

2 mirena failures here, MAP afterwards.

At 1st mirena appointment I asked about contraception, commenting that surely I wouldn’t need any at 45.
My GP said that they had a patient who was convinced she was menopausal, turned out she was pregnant. She was 49 😱

Oysterbabe · 09/10/2020 23:01

We use condoms. Every time my husband complains about it I tell him to get the snip and he shuts up for a few more weeks.

movingonup20 · 09/10/2020 23:04

I opted for the mirena after my drs arranged for a test to check my hormone levels - I thought I was peri menopausal but it came back not and I couldn't risk it. I have adult kids and a new (ish now) dp. After 4 weeks of bleeding and pain it settled and in period free

Allywill · 09/10/2020 23:08

google oldest natural
pregnancy. you will be v surprised. i am 53 and still on the pop. i do keep thinking surely i don’t need it but that google prays on my mind.

BewilderedDoughnut · 09/10/2020 23:22

Yep that’s another option but I’m another one with a DH who seems to think it’s akin to having it chopped off

Me these days honestly. Never willing to do their bit. My husband had a vasectomy in his early 20s and didn’t bat an eye. His was back up on his feet two days later. What’s not to love about completely worry free, anytime, spontaneous sex??

CherryPieface · 09/10/2020 23:27

I’m 48 and due to get my implant replaced, but because of COVID restrictions they are only removing them, not replacing them. So I’m in a similar boat OP, kind of thinking I’m old enough to be ok, but not confident that’s really the case. And I’d be surprised if anyone’s doing vasectomies right now - even getting a GP’s appointment is pretty much impossible right now, never mind a referral. Condoms it is...