To ask over 50s to check in to show we are not a separate breed of Mumsnetters

[LaureBerthaud]

COVID has really brought out the ageism on Mumsnet! Over 50s are not an homogeneous group sucking on our Werther's Originals longing for the social centre to re-open so we can resume whist drives and coach trips to outlet stores with a nice cafe attached!

I'm mum to DC who's taking their GCSEs next year and I will have to continue working to support them through uni and because I enjoy working AND I have a mortgage!

So stop trying to lock us down - the economy needs us as taxpayers and consumers!

When I say the way people think has changed I mean mainly with regard to personal relationships. As far as environmental and political issues there has always been a variety of opinion. The CND marchers and Greenham common women are getting older now but there wereThatcherites too. Any age group contains a variety of people, MN tends to generalise and dismiss based on age. It isn't just calling people old biddies, it's more subtle than that.

@TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince

I challenged Mumsnet on the use of the term ‘boomer’.

Their response? ‘It’s a word that has always been used’

Yeah, as a marketing term, not as an insult.

I haven’t finished with it yet.

Can we help? That’s ridiculous - every single insult you can think of is a word that’s always been used.

53, work FT, dc are 12 & 9

I know.

As I’ve said l haven’t finished yet. I replied exampling various insults that have been used indicated with asterisk ‘that have always been used’ As l said l haven’t finished with it yet. You can pm me if you would like to see the email and response, or what other action l intend to take.I found their response insulting, childish and shallow.

Or l could just post it?’ Might get banned though😄

A couple of years ago there was a long thread about ageism and MNHQ eventually came on and apologised for not taking it seriously. Little has changed though. Phrases like 'old biddy' and OK boomer are now deleted but a lot of stereotyping remains.

‘Boomer’ isn’t deleted

And they didn’t reply to the last email where l listed specific insults that ‘had always been used’ and were now no longer used due to the nastiness of them.

Even writing these words down made me angry, although as l said, l only wrote the first word followed by asterisks and the context.

That's true, and it's true that most insults started off as a widely used word but we know they are an insult now to the point that we would feel uncomfortable writing down examples.

They were ‘baby boomers’ - yes a term used in marketing as a term to describe the post war generation, along with generation X, etc. Not as a shut down insult, shorthand for ‘why aren’t you dead yet?’

So, l can’t upload my photos of the emails to private messaging. Does anyone know how to?

I can't see an option for that EmojiPrince

@TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince

So, l can’t upload my photos of the emails to private messaging. Does anyone know how to?

Can you copy and paste the content into a PM?

Yeah, I’ll try! Bit slow this morning!

Won’t let me paste into it.

Sorry

I am 50 and have a 10 year old. Single parent and next to no pension so I will be working forever.
I have friends in every age bracket from 20's to 80's and the only difference is that the over 50's tend to regard 9pm as the time to start thinking of bed, rather than the time to go out drinking.

I'm 50 next year but please can I join you, before society forces me into loose-fitting clothing & a chair-based exercise class with music by Vera Lynn?

I'm not stereotyping older people in that sentence, it's what I've noticed happening in over 30 years of caring for older people. I've also noticed that some people feel they have to fit that stereotype once they hit a certain point in life. Maybe that's because society doesn't cater for their tastes & interests, I don't know?

I've had a lot of family & friends over the years who are older than me and they don't fit with those stereotypes, & I aspire to be like them.

Life & society has moved on since my grandparents' generation (born 100 years ago). Retirement was only supposed to be short. (Mine bucked that trend & didn't spend it sitting still!)

Contrast that to my parents working until 70 because they had to, & until covid, they were never at home due to so many social events. God only knows how long I'll have to work for, but I don't blame that generation. I'm fed up with hearing that they're selfish, just as I'm fed up with hearing that younger people are lazy, reckless covid-spreaders.

I'm also getting a bit tired of the assumption that all women over 50 are batty because of the menopause, & they can all be fixed just like that with a bit of HRT & by opening a window.

Dad not mum, but turn 63 later this month, DW turns 50 early next year and DC1 is 16 in Year 12 and DC2 13 in Year 9. Split my time between two high-profile jobs and working virtually full-time. Think I last played whist when I was 10. Don't feel in the least bit ready to retire and am applying for new jobs.

I’m an actress (well I was before Covid - sigh) and one phenomenon I've come across repeatedly is that roles for younger women tend to specify age ranges like '18-21' or '25-30', but once you get past 50 it just says '50+' for anything from a middle-aged part to a granny. Sometimes it says '50-70' or '50-80'. I've written to more than one casting director asking what it is they actually want, because I don't consider myself suitable for the same roles as a 70-year-old, any more than for a 30-year-old. I got cast in one 50-70 role and then they wanted to put a grey permed wig on me, which just made my face look younger by contrast and it looked ridiculous. I quit and told them to hire an older actress as there are lots of them looking for work.

Once you pass 40 there are dozens of older women auditioning for any tiny part that might be suitable, it's so sad and frustrating. Then of course you get the young male directors who won't cast you at all for anything decent because they look at you and just seem to see their mum. And the very common practice of casting 35-year-old women for roles that are written as 50+. It's a struggle. Anyway suffice to say I am currently 'doing a Rishi' and retraining - temporarily - but when we can finally do theatre again I'll probably come back as a director instead!

Anyway I’m 52 with an 11-year-old DS. Honestly, it's been tiring and I do wish I'd had kids younger, but I had a good few decades of partying which I don't regret for a millisecond. I do have some health and mobility issues now which sometimes make my body feel ancient, but in my head I’m still the oldest teenager in town!

I’m 59, retired by default, childless, cat servant AND I knit.

@Athrawes

I am 50 and have a 10 year old. Single parent and next to no pension so I will be working forever. I have friends in every age bracket from 20's to 80's and the only difference is that the over 50's tend to regard 9pm as the time to start thinking of bed, rather than the time to go out drinking.

God, I've found the opposite! I've always had mixed age friendship groups and these days it's the youngsters who are teetotal and want to go home early! 9pm is like the middle of the afternoon to me, lol.

I'm 51 have school age children, work all the hours god sends, pay a shed load of tax, take care of my elderly parents and in-laws, and am fitter and healthier than many 30 year olds I know.
Without us over 50s out there the economy would collapse, we contribute massively and have great spending power.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4044247-How-should-covid-be-paid-for

Look at this thread for hatred of people in our age group.

@TheEmojiFormerlyKnownAsPrince

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4044247-How-should-covid-be-paid-for

Look at this thread for hatred of people in our age group.

Yes, it took about three posts for that to turn into intergenerational warfare.

if that involves watching The Indian Doctor, then make room for me and I'll share your Jaffa cakes

Just discovered this beautiful; series and want to know why it is buried in the middle of the day.

Surely it should be on on a Sunday evening.

Just watched the one about a smallpox outbreak, and his struggle to get people to isolate and vaccinate. Oh the irony!!

The ageist attitude of lock us up so the 'young' can get on with their lives has pissed me off, really pissed me off

I'm with you on that one. Just 51 and have worked throughout covid on freelance public health type projects. Got two teenagers that we adopted recently and both DH and I (who is a couple years older and also worked on covid type stuff) have done our bit and are entitled to a good life as much as young people.