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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To worry I’ve annoyed my psychiatrist

34 replies

Coldnights · 07/10/2020 09:54

I yawned in a video call yesterday and then he said “are you tired” I’m worried he will now think I’m rude.

OP posts:
DisplayPurposesOnly · 07/10/2020 09:55

YABVU

toconclude · 07/10/2020 09:56

Sounds like he was being kind?

TOFO1965 · 07/10/2020 09:57

He can handle it, and if he’s annoyed by a yawn (which I’m sure he isn’t!) then he’s in the wrong gig. Your yawn doesn’t matter, keep your focus on the reason you’re in session with him in the first place :)

NW2SW · 07/10/2020 09:58

You're allowed to be tired. And therapy can be exhausting. The only place I'd say it was truly offensive/bad form to yawn is a job interview or a wedding. You're fine.

Original poster
Coldnights · 07/10/2020 09:58

Sorry I just worrying about annoying or upsetting people constantly.

OP posts:
MattBerrysHair · 07/10/2020 09:58

Totally overthinking! I know how easy it is to over analyse and get fixated on small details like this though. You yawned and he asked if you were tired, which is totally human on both sides. He was making an observation, not a judgement. You need to stop judging yourself.

NW2SW · 07/10/2020 10:01

@Coldnights you've no need to apologise. If you are tired or struggling to sleep then he really needs to know that, which is probably the only reason he asked. Hopefully you should feel like your appointments are a safe space.

LittleMissNaice · 07/10/2020 10:02

Sedation is a common side effect of some mental health medications. And sleep is often disrupted when people are finding things difficult. I would imagine he was asking if you're tired for the purposes of assessment rather than thinking you're rude.

mindfcuk · 07/10/2020 10:03

As a PP said, he has to ask as sleep affects mood etc. He will not think you're rude whatsoever. Try not to worry Thanks

Goneback2school · 07/10/2020 10:05

I'm a psych nurse, he was asking because he needs to know if you are sleeping, over sedated etc. We are used to a lot more than people yawning, try not to worry!

HandfulofDust · 07/10/2020 10:06

Massively over thinking. He was just concerned that you're tired and whether you're sleeping properly.

Original poster
Coldnights · 07/10/2020 11:17

He’s normally good so I’m hoping I haven’t annoyed

OP posts:
Terralee · 07/10/2020 11:21

Hi @Coldnights I see a psychiatrist too, they're generally quite laid back & also concerned with things like side effects of meds that's why he was asking if you were tired.

TheHighestSardine · 07/10/2020 11:49

If your psychiatrist did get annoyed, you would punt them as incompetent.

But it's just a symptom of your anxiety. Let it go, and even talk about it with your psychiatrist. Not for validation that they weren't annoyed, but to demonstrate your mental stress so they can help you with it.

Chipsahoy · 07/10/2020 11:56

Tell him. Complete honesty and openness

SpaceOP · 07/10/2020 12:07

OP, I don't know what you're seeing him for, but I'd be inclined to tell him how much you worried about annoying him for a yawn. Because, in the nicest possible way, that is absolutely ridiculous. Yawning through dinner with a friend, without apologising or clarifying the your'e just exhausted would be a bit rude perhaps, but other than that, a yawn is just a yawn and your therapist absolutely should see that. But your'e scared you've "annoyed" him which doesn't bode well for how the therapeutic relationship is working out.

[for the record, I clicked on this thinking you were going to say you'd been hounding him by text message or changed your appointment 3 times at late notice. Those are things that might be considered annoying in such a situation. Not this]

BakedTattie · 07/10/2020 12:46

People yawn in my sessions all the time. It’s normal

Original poster
Coldnights · 07/10/2020 14:59

I would be worried I had upset someone no matter who they were. I constantly worry and I feel yawning mid conversation is a bit rude on my part.

OP posts:
lioncitygirl · 07/10/2020 15:06

It’s the anxiety in you talking. Don’t worry about it.

contrmary · 07/10/2020 15:07

Bring it up at your next meeting. Tell him that you have been worrying that he thinks you are rude because you accidentally yawned.

Things like this show your true feelings and worries, they are part of the information he needs to help you.

Thelnebriati · 07/10/2020 15:20

Mention it next time you see him but don't let his reaction make you feel bad - yawning is a sign your minds needs a rest, and can happen after intense mental activity. He should be used to it, not offended.
Best thing to do if you find yourself yawning is stand up and move around, then return to the activity.

1forAll74 · 07/10/2020 15:34

You would think that psychiatrists would yawn and fall asleep with what they have to deal with. But it's ok for you to yawn, you might have been tired, or even hungry.

Original poster
Coldnights · 08/10/2020 16:46

I don’t think I will mention it to him as he may find that odd.

OP posts:
Pacif1cDogwood · 08/10/2020 16:52

Yawning is a common sign of anxiety.
Dogs yawn to indicate stress to other dogs.

Your issue seems to be a low sense of self-worth which is really difficult to live with. Hope you'll find the help you need Thanks

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 08/10/2020 17:05

I do the same thing OP, constantly worry if people are mad or I've upset them but MH professionals are made of sterner stuff. You haven't annoyed him. My therapist, in the space of a year, has reassured me, probably upwards of a hundred times that he isn't annoyed or fed up or experiencing any kind of negative feeling towards me and I have no doubt that he will do it a couple hundred more times before we're done. They get this all the time, anxiety is common and this behaviour is textbook social anxiety.