To not want to talk about the food I’m eating

[Limona]

It is a minor thing but DH eats faster than I do. He then WATCHES me eat.

‘How’s your lamb?’

‘What’s the fish like?’

‘How’s your lasagne?’

I’m not saying it’s a LTB thread but AIBU to find this so fucking annoying? I’m generally eating it so it must be pretty nice, surely?

I hate that too old especially as they always seem to time it when I’m talking or have a mouthful of food. It’s so anti social.

@Oldraver

I hate this in restaurants where they come 5 minutes in and ask you how the food is.

I find it very rude and off putting, just go away I'm eating

I've always assumed they do it to try to stop people eating the food then claiming something was awful about it in order to try to get it free/discounted.

If you talk to me while I'm eating then you've caused me to consume calories without enjoying the meal I've been looking forward to for hours.

That's one of the oddest remarks I've ever read on MN (and that's saying something). You expect people to sit in absolute silence while eating? You must be a wow at dinner parties.

My FIL like this. You sit down to eat and you just about have to time to have a sip of water before I get asked - is your dinner hot enough/how the potatoes, etc, etc. Sometime he even starts firing questions as I’m lifting the first forkful of food to my mouth! I’m not even a slow eater!

I hate people commenting on my food. Whether it's disparaging remarks ("urgh, how can you eat that?") or complimentary ones ("oooh, that smells lovely, what is it?").

What my food actually is, is MINE. Get your nebby nose away from it and let me eat in peace.

LTB

Seriously, I would hate this. It would make me feel like just pushing my plate aside and saying "here, you fucking have it then."

I'd be more bothered about his awful table manners, golloping his food - so unattractive.

It gives me anxiety too, my husband is a shit for this. And then my daughter (ASD) mimics everything so she does this regular too

I hate when restaurants do it. It’s always when you’ve got a mouthful as well.

My exH never, ever ate dessert. So if I had one in a restaurant he would sit with no food, not even coffee (which he didn't drink) and watch me eating every mouthful, expecting me to tell him what it was like, was I enjoying it, and on and on

My dear departed stepfather did a version of this, usually when a group of us ate together. He'd be flitting up and down helping to dish up, and when everyone had their food and was settling down to chat with the family and eat, he'd be prancing around the table butting in to every conversation with "has everyone got enough carrots? Are we alright for gravy? Do you need more potatoes? A drink, is your drink OK, so you need a top up? Sprouts? Sprouts?"

It disrupted the flow of every discussion and was annoying, and now my DH bloody does it too with his kids (my stepchildren).

DH and I both do this. If I’ve cooked something I’ll ask if it’s okay, but I only ask once.

A few nights ago we bought individual beef wellingtons and I sat down to eat mine first as DH was faffing about with condiments/extra sides. He asked how it was as I’d tried it and he hadn’t yet.

I don’t see the issue with it! However, I’ve worked with people who comment on the look/smell/calories of food alllll the time and that’s annoying.

(I realise naming the specific dish is weird without context - all I meant was it was a ‘stick in the oven’ dinner, so neither of us had tasted it while preparing)

Ask him a question that requires a long detailed answer just after he had taken his first couple of bites. Then let him take another bite and say “what are the reasons that some people might not agree?”.

This should help him finish eating closer to when you finish.

God this gives me the rage. I hate people firing questions at me when i’m eating. Just fuck off.

I know you've put 3 questions in your OP but obviously you're only going to be eating one of those things.

So are you saying you find it really fucking annoying when he asks one question about whether you're enjoying your food?

Pretty much worra, tbh.

I can understand it if he’s cooked (which never happens!) but I’d say it was lovely then anyway, even if it wasn’t.

What is annoying is this:

‘I saw sally when I was coming out of the office, and she told me William is leaving next month.’

‘How’s your fish?’

So YOU cook and he asks you how it is?! Wow! Tell him ‘It’s lovely because I made and can I eat in peace now??!’

He needs more food as he’s eyeing up yours

Is he greedy/overweight?

Neither of us really cook to be honest how

Presumably you are the one hearing it up though? Or does he heat it up?

Are you getting a takeaway every night?

Not sure the questions would bother me that much. My in-laws (and therefore husband and siblings) have this weird thing where they will all ask around the table "how's the chicken/fish/stew/soup?" even though everybody's eating the same thing. And not just the person who's made it either. It really confused me at first and I'm still tempted to say "well, it's the same as yours" but I tend to be polite. Think it's in lieu of proper conversation.

@Limona

Pretty much worra, tbh.

I can understand it if he’s cooked (which never happens!) but I’d say it was lovely then anyway, even if it wasn’t.

What is annoying is this:

‘I saw sally when I was coming out of the office, and she told me William is leaving next month.’

‘How’s your fish?’

Well that's as subtle as a brick to the face isn't it?

I don't care about what you're saying.

You should ask him directly about that!

My husband is like this with food. But also TV. He'll pause TV programmes or films and be like "so you're not enjoying this are you?" When I clearly fucking am, just because I'm not laughing my flaps off at some silly teenage-inspired joke. And he'll pause it 50 fucking times to ask stupid shit like this. "I'll turn this off then shall I because you're not enjoying it"

When I get the rage about this, food or tv related, he'll say I'm being unreasonable.

Sorry this is polite small talk to me and I think it's a bit chippy to take offense.

@Couchbettato

My husband is like this with food. But also TV. He'll pause TV programmes or films and be like "so you're not enjoying this are you?" When I clearly fucking am, just because I'm not laughing my flaps off at some silly teenage-inspired joke. And he'll pause it 50 fucking times to ask stupid shit like this. "I'll turn this off then shall I because you're not enjoying it"

When I get the rage about this, food or tv related, he'll say I'm being unreasonable.

If my Dh did this I would not be responsible for my actions. How haven't you put the remote where the sun don't shine. Next time make sure you get control of the remote or do it when he's watching something he enjoys and see how he likes it. Feel angry on your behalf can you tell?