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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think people take pregnancy tests much too early these days?

85 replies

CounsellorTroi · 02/10/2020 11:54

What is the point of doing it before you know you’re even late? Why not wait until you are late and getting a result that is at least conclusive even if not the one you want? Isn’t there something just a wee bit exploitative about these very early tests?

OP posts:
SkylinesTurnstiles · 02/10/2020 11:57

Desperation.

ViciousJackdaw · 02/10/2020 12:13

Isn’t there something just a wee bit exploitative about these very early tests?

Definitely. They are cashing in on women's desperation. It's dreadful. I'm willing to bet the retail mark up on these tests is massive. Obviously, that's just business but at the same time, it doesn't seem right. I feel the same about fertility clinics too. Of course, they have helped so many people and for that, they should be applauded but at the same time, I can't help but think they are selling false hope.

Parkandride · 02/10/2020 12:18

They must make a fortune, the stats on accuracy for testing early- even on the tests that promote this - are terrible. Then the feeling you need to keep taking the clear blue week indicator ones to see if you're progressing.
I don't blame people for doing them, I had to sit on my hands to not buy more. It's terrifying when you don't know what's going on in your own body, everything is so out of control.

Ohalrightthen · 02/10/2020 12:18

Yupppp

Early pregnancy tests are just a license to print money imo.

Pelleas · 02/10/2020 12:18

I agree - they are exploiting women who are vulnerable and irrational as a result of their desperation to bear a child.

Newmumatlast · 02/10/2020 12:29

@ViciousJackdaw

Isn’t there something just a wee bit exploitative about these very early tests?

Definitely. They are cashing in on women's desperation. It's dreadful. I'm willing to bet the retail mark up on these tests is massive. Obviously, that's just business but at the same time, it doesn't seem right. I feel the same about fertility clinics too. Of course, they have helped so many people and for that, they should be applauded but at the same time, I can't help but think they are selling false hope.

Fertility clinics really aren't selling false hope. Decent ones have really good % success rates when considered against the actually pretty low rates of conception naturally even without issue. There are a lot of people who just need a nudge - myself included (and it worked). I think though if clinics aren't responsible and honest with people that is when it is unfair. Some people really do not have a good chance of success and should be told so. But, again, I think reputable places do that.
PolarBearStrength · 02/10/2020 12:30

Yes. Early pregnancy tests are definitely exploitative. There is no real benefit to knowing you might be pregnant at 3-4 weeks. It just causes heartache when it turns out to be a chemical or even just a misread of the test.

We do an online self referral system for our maternity services now and I‘be had some come through where the woman is 3+3 or 3+4. Any I get before 6 weeks I just put in a box for a couple of weeks as there really isn’t anything useful we can do beyond advising the standard vitamins etc which is all stated on the form.

Cabinfever10 · 02/10/2020 12:32

The worst part of these tests is that they give so many false positives and then when the poor woman gets her period she thinks that she has had a miscarriage.

FourPlasticRings · 02/10/2020 12:33

Better question- why do you care?

MsEllany · 02/10/2020 12:34

YANBU. I hide those posts that pop up really frequently, it’s invariably someone who’s done 3+ tests two days after their period was due and wants to know if ‘anyone else sees a line’. I’ve never seen a line. But there’s always plenty of people on the post saying they have and congrats and all that jazz.

whirlwindwallaby · 02/10/2020 12:34

I waited until I missed my period. I think when people say about the 'olden days' how people wouldn't have known until they missed their second period, an early miscarriage was just a late, heavy period and so on, well I miscarried at eight weeks and then was no way I could have mistaken it for a period.

Pineapples1980 · 02/10/2020 12:34

After nearly three years TTC, IVF and two miscarriages I find them useful for knowing if I can (or can’t) enjoy a drink on a night out, or lunch with friends, that might be planned for just before I am due on. TTC takes enough enjoyment out of life without restricting my social life.

OhWifey · 02/10/2020 12:35

For me, when dealing with infertility I used early tests to gradually let myself down gently every month. It was far far better for my mental health (and the exhausting monthly grief cycle) to gradually come to the realisation that yet again there was no baby, rather than the sudden shut door when my period arrived.

Winnietp · 02/10/2020 12:35

@FourPlasticRings

Better question- why do you care?
This!

I was so excited when I was TTC, I took the test as soon as possible. I’m glad I did as I got booked on to early scans, and it helped me a lot with feeling anxious.

Nottherealslimshady · 02/10/2020 12:36
  1. Wtf has it got to do with you?
  2. People who are struggling to get pregnant get valuable information from it. You know if you're having recurrent chemical pregnancies and early losses which can get you help earlier and more specific for your issues.

Yeah it's great that so many women fall pregnant when "just letting it happen" then realise they haven't had a period in a while and oh look! A health 12 week old baby, god I feel great!

I had morning sickness at 3 weeks pregnant, if I hadn't done an early test I'd be taking a myriad of pills for all my sickness, headaches etc and I wouldn't be taking vitamins, all of which would increase my chance of loss.

Dont be so judgemental of women going through the struggle of trying to get pregnant and suffering early losses.

perfumeistooexpensive · 02/10/2020 12:36

They are exploiting women and adding a whole new layer of anxiety. When I was pregnant with DD1 the doctor didn't offer pregnancy testing and you certainly couldn't buy one. I had to wait for two missed periods until I could see the doctor and be booked for the midwife. Any bleeding following a missed period in that time was completely dismissed by the GP. I was bleeding seven weeks after my last period and when I phoned to say I thought I was having a miscarriage I was told that it was just a late period. It did cut out the anxiety that women present today. No worrying about how dark or light a line is, no chemical pregnancies, no constant testing. You were either pregnant or not. The chance of miscarriage was exactly the same. No early scans or tests make any difference.

Sweetmotherofallthatisholyabov · 02/10/2020 12:36

No such thing as a false positive as far as I know, she is having a misscarriage. She just might have been better off not knowing if she'd waited later to test.

1990shopefulftm · 02/10/2020 12:37

I took one 4 days before my period and it was negative so was certain I wasn't pregnant and then found out on the day it was due that I actually was pregnant, the first test I used was very cheap but not much money lost and it was a nice surprise, would have been better if I had waited though.

Original poster
CounsellorTroi · 02/10/2020 12:38

@FourPlasticRings

Better question- why do you care?
I have a long history of infertility and I’m disturbed by the e x side of the fertility industry which undoubtedly exists. There was a thread just recently about the utter bullshit some clinic had on their website.

That ok by you?

OP posts:
Gancanny · 02/10/2020 12:38

Better question- why do you care?

Same question here.

It doesn't harm you in any way so why are you bothered? Their uterus, their money, their business.

In all of my pregnancies I started throwing up from around 2-4 days before my period was due, in two of my pregnancies I didn't miss a period until 8wks for one and five months for the other, and in all my pregnancies I had moderate to heavy bleeding on and off throughout. The sooner I knew I was pregnant, the sooner I could start arguing with the GP for anti-emetics and the sooner I could get a referral to EPU to monitor the bleeding.

FourPlasticRings · 02/10/2020 12:40

I have a long history of infertility and I’m disturbed by the e x side of the fertility industry which undoubtedly exists. There was a thread just recently about the utter bullshit some clinic had on their website.

And what does this have to do with how early women choose to take pregnancy tests?

Megan2018 · 02/10/2020 12:41

They are ridiculous and just cause so much stress. Same as private very early scanning for no medical reason (obviously necessary for bleeding, suspected ectopic, previous miscarriage, fertility treatment etc etc or for NIPT I don’t mean that).

I had NIPT so had a scan at around 10 weeks as part of that process but didn’t test ever until I was actually late. Those first weeks are horribly anxious times but unnecessary pregnancy tests and scans don’t help, they just make money for other people.

Most people do not need to know they are pregnant until at least 4 weeks+, it’s generally only those with medical conditions eg if you need to start or stop medication when pregnant. That’s not most people though!

BergamotMouse · 02/10/2020 12:42

I bought the tests that were pennies each from eBay. You don't have to spend a fortune. It's probably not a great thing to do and you do obsess over it but for me I did it because I found the whole thing so exciting. I wouldn't have bought a clear blue or first response though.

MrsKJones · 02/10/2020 12:42

@OhWifey me too! I was undergoing fertility treatment to conceive my DS and I got really sore boobs the day before my period was due and I just knew i felt differently. Dared not get my hopes up so did a test following morning more so that I could see it was negative and get on with my day (after a little cry). To my enormous surprise it was positive - i must have only been about 2-3 weeks pregnant at that point.
Unless you have been through that experience (monthly blood tests, tablets, monitoring levels etc etc) you cannot explain those feelings and emotions and I certainly would not judge someone

PurpleDaisies · 02/10/2020 12:42

I agree, and the line eyes squinter threads are often emperor’s new clothes too.