Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Colleague is blaming me for speeding fine

224 replies

LivingLifeInPink · 27/09/2020 06:55

A few weeks ago I called a friend a colleague with a work related query and he answered while he was driving (handsfree). I didn't know he was driving - we work remotely at the moment.

A week later he received a speeding fine and he's looked at the call logs - it shows he was caught speeding 1 minute into our two minute phone call.

He is saying it's my fault as the call distracted him. It was a static speed camera, not a policeman - ie. the camera is always there and it's a route he takes every day.

I really don't think I'm responsible for his own mistakes.

OP posts:
TooLittleTooLate80 · 27/09/2020 11:40
Grin
mediumperiperi · 27/09/2020 11:41

If it was one minute into your phone call he was probably speeding already so I'd do a Hmm face. You didn't force him to take the call

PaulineScrambledPhones · 27/09/2020 11:47

Time to bust out the MN tinkly little laugh.

ddl1 · 27/09/2020 11:50

No, how were you to know when he was driving? He didn't have to answer the phone.

vodkaredbullgirl · 27/09/2020 11:53

Twat, you didnt make him put his foot down.

cologne4711 · 27/09/2020 11:55

He was the driver - only he was in control of the car.

Wroxie · 27/09/2020 12:03

To start with, you definitely weren't at fault.

Related, my sister's husband and their baby were killed in the states by someone distracted by a hands-free call nearly 15 years ago. I won't talk to someone who is driving and I actually quit a job over it once much earlier in my career - the lead of the project I was managing insisted on dialling into meetings while driving and I just wouldn't have it.

Hands-free is just as distracting as holding the phone to your ear and you're a selfish menace if you still use it. I don't care if it's built in to your car. Make sure to remember my sister holding her dead baby next to the body of her dead husband while the man who killed them had to call for an ambulance next time you ring your partner to see if he wants anything from the shop.

Elsewyre · 27/09/2020 12:11

Well hes just admitted driving withut due care and attention that's another 3 points if you want to send the evidence to the police Grin

iklboo · 27/09/2020 12:11

Because back then my step dad was not known for hanging about and it was lucky I’d been driving as at 80 I escaped with a 3 point FPN. Had he been driving down that road at that time he’d have been going significantly quicker and not been so lucky.

You've still not said why you were driving over 80mph in a 60 zone - or why you thought it was acceptable.

PhilCornwall1 · 27/09/2020 12:18

No you weren't at fault, your colleague decided to answer the phone.

I've got hands free in my car and the only person I answer the phone to is my wife, but she's told to make the call quick. I won't answer work calls whilst driving.

nothingcanhurtmewithmyeyesshut · 27/09/2020 12:19

Its a ringing phone, not a court summons. He didn't have to answer it. His problem.

HuggedTheRedwoods · 27/09/2020 12:22

If he's so easily distracted he should set his phone to Do Not Disturb when driving.

newnameforthis123 · 27/09/2020 12:30

@iklboo

Because back then my step dad was not known for hanging about and it was lucky I’d been driving as at 80 I escaped with a 3 point FPN. Had he been driving down that road at that time he’d have been going significantly quicker and not been so lucky.

You've still not said why you were driving over 80mph in a 60 zone - or why you thought it was acceptable.

Same here, it's something to be ashamed of not an amusing anecdote surely...
mistermagpie · 27/09/2020 12:46

I've had this with my DH, he got a speeding ticket when he was on the phone to me and tried to make out it was my fault!

Eh, no. He didn't have to answer the phone or drive above the speed limit, neither of those things were my responsibility.

mistermagpie · 27/09/2020 12:46

Sorry, and neither is this situation yours.

PuppyMonkey · 27/09/2020 12:49

Just respond to all further communications from him with a lol. Or a Grin.

DGRossetti · 27/09/2020 13:35

I've got hands free in my car and the only person I answer the phone to is my wife, but she's told to make the call quick. I won't answer work calls whilst driving.

There are driving "apps" that permit starred callers to get through while diverting all others to voicemail.

There really is no excuse for ever taking a call while driving.

Oblomov20 · 27/09/2020 13:49

What a dick!

Sewrainbow · 27/09/2020 13:58

Not your fault....

Wroxie · 27/09/2020 14:57

@PhilCornwall1 the man who killed my brother-in-law and baby niece while distracted by his hands-free call was talking to his own daughter and insisted it was a 'just a quick call'. I can send you a photograph of the crash scene from the local news at the time, along with some details of exactly what my sister experienced while waiting for the ambulance to arrive, if it would help you (or anyone) reconsider your use of hands-free calling in your car.

ASandwichNamedKevin · 27/09/2020 15:10

@Wroxie that's awful 💐

A relative of mine always answers the phone when driving, I say I'll call back and get told no, now is a good time because he's only going to XYZ place.
I will hang up from now on.

MintyMabel · 27/09/2020 15:13

Where was he driving to when he should have been working?

I presume you understand not everybody’s job is done at the same location 9-5?

DGRossetti · 27/09/2020 15:19

[quote Wroxie]@PhilCornwall1 the man who killed my brother-in-law and baby niece while distracted by his hands-free call was talking to his own daughter and insisted it was a 'just a quick call'. I can send you a photograph of the crash scene from the local news at the time, along with some details of exactly what my sister experienced while waiting for the ambulance to arrive, if it would help you (or anyone) reconsider your use of hands-free calling in your car.[/quote]
That's heartbreaking.

Sadly when it comes to issues like this, everyone is an exception because accidents like that only happen to other people.

I'd be quite happy to see a complete ban on using phones for communication while driving. However, a casual trawl of the Android app store for apps designed to make calling (and texting) while driving "easier" suggests I'm a weirdo.

Wroxie · 27/09/2020 16:18

@DGRossetti texting while driving! My god. Nothing surprises me, though, a few weeks ago I could clearly see the man in front of me with a video playing on the phone in his windscreen mount. My phone is muted and in my bag when I'm driving - I don't even use it for satnav. Luckily I have a decent memory and sense of direction so I can figure out where I'm going, or close enough, by looking at google maps before I set off, and then if I need to look again when I get nearer, I park up first. It hardly takes any more time, and it makes you a better map-reader and a better driver generally - people seem to think my ability to find where I'm going without a magically updating map in my face the entire time as some sort of super power.

@ASandwichNamedKevin I'm really glad to hear that, thank you!

safariboot · 27/09/2020 16:21

Since he's your colleague, YANBU. Driver's responsibility.

If you were his manager or boss, and have pressured him to take calls while he's driving, only then would you bear a share of the responsibility.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.