Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Colleagues social media - WWYD

149 replies

Colleaguedilemma99 · 24/09/2020 07:26

Name changed

I saw on Facebook a colleague was suggested as a friend I may know. Not really friends but had a nose on profile. To my disgust, there are retweets of anti BLM posts and also a post saying he had beat up a man that said something to his kid.

This colleague is a senior manager in a public company. I’m not jealous, we are not competitors so that is. It my angle but wibu to report this?

Would he lose his job or get a telling off. I have seen him be unpleasant before and I feel like he should be pulled to task but equally it’s a tough economic time if he were to lose his job. I don’t think that would happen. I could imagine they publically re-educate him, so they save face and he “learns”. The posts are disgusting so that would be false.

Voting yes - ignore, Ainu

       No - reports, this is wrong
OP posts:
thoughtcrime · 24/09/2020 09:08

Being anti-BLM is not the same as being racist.

BLM is a shadowy organisation with views that the majority of people would find extreme.

IMO BLM has done much more harm than good to the cause of anti-racism by its violence and extremism, not to mention baseless claims.

Thankfully I don't have an employer but the idea that people would be stalking my social media for evidence of wrongthink is chilling.

FrustratedC0ffeeDrinker · 24/09/2020 09:08

It depends on the contents and contexts of the posts. Just because he is anti-BLM doesn’t make him a racist. Based on the information you’ve given I would not report him.

Laaalaaaa · 24/09/2020 09:10

Not supporting the black lives movement does not make someone racist. I’ve seen members of the black community saying they don’t support the movement and don’t agree with all their principles.

ThatDamnScientist · 24/09/2020 09:10

@Newkitty

We all have our role to play in anti racism. You cannot take responsibility for what the company seeks to do, but I do think you can take responsibility for your own actions or non actions. Silence is violence. Imagine being a black person who needs to use that company, or work for them.

I think you should report him.

This 100%.
RedRumTheHorse · 24/09/2020 09:12

@Mintjulia

We don't live in a police state, thank God.

Being unpleasant is not a crime. Holding negative views on BLM ( the organisation) is not a crime. His employer doesn't own him. He is entitled to think what he likes in his own time. I would not link to him as a friend and I'd downvote his post if that is an option.

But I'd only raise it if he is an HR decision maker or strategist. Or if he was spouting his bigotry in work.

If he's an engineer or scientist, his personal views do not impact his ability to do his job.

Scientists and engineers work with other international companies and often in international teams.

He needs reporting as it is very easy for people in that sphere to search and find other people's social media profiles.

changerr · 24/09/2020 09:13

YABVVVU - shocking really

People are allowed to be unpleasant. There's no law against it. They're also allowed to be anti-BLM. You may not like it, but that's how it is.

Keep your nose out.

seayork2020 · 24/09/2020 09:14

No i do not stalk social media posts to find things i don't agree with to report so its a no from me

Iamthewombat · 24/09/2020 09:14

Scientists and engineers work with other international companies and often in international teams.

He needs reporting as it is very easy for people in that sphere to search and find other people's social media profiles.

Then why does he need reporting? Surely everyone in his ‘sphere’ would already have seen his profile, if it’s as easy to find as you say, and consequently everyone he works for, and with, would have access to a perfect market for information?

FOKKYFC · 24/09/2020 09:16

The idea that you can 'snoop' (which is an annoying word anyway) on someone's public social media profile incenses me. Tighten up your fucking settings if you don't want someone looking - because that's what they're doing; 'looking' - at it.
He sounds vile but I probably wouldn't report it to his employer. Not sure about the admission of assault, though. That was particularly stupid of him - but then these people so often are.

FrizzyHairMalarkey · 24/09/2020 09:19

I genuinely think everyone should be made to read 1984 so that they understand the very real danger of being the Thought Police...

imissthesouth · 24/09/2020 09:21

It's quite worrying how many people would use someone's social media against them. We're already one step closer to a police state it seems. Unless he's clearly showing the same views irl back off.

Imloosingmyshit · 24/09/2020 09:21

So it would be ok with you if he posted pro blm stuff?? So you think it’s ok to be bullied by troublemakers????? To be intimidated by violent noisy vigilantes?

imissthesouth · 24/09/2020 09:22

@Imloosingmyshit

So it would be ok with you if he posted pro blm stuff?? So you think it’s ok to be bullied by troublemakers????? To be intimidated by violent noisy vigilantes?
This exactly
FOKKYFC · 24/09/2020 09:22

You're not policing anyone's thoughts, though, are you? You're policing their actions. That's why sexual attraction to children isn't a crime, but sexually assaulting them is . . .

contrmary · 24/09/2020 09:22

What exactly were the "anti-BLM" posts about?

Saying you disagree with people attending BLM protests during a pandemic because it is idiotic to have a gathering of people crowded together would be anti-BLM but fine.

Saying you disagree with people ripping down statues and chucking them in rivers - fine.

Saying you don't believe there is a need for BLM - fine.

Saying that BLM protesters need to go back to the jungle they crawled from - not fine. Obviously report them for this.

Just because someone doesn't support a political movement doesn't automatically make them wrong, or deserve to lose their job. Hate crimes are illegal, thought crimes not so.

cyclingmad · 24/09/2020 09:24

So how does this work so long as your Facebook profile does not say what company your work for and you mention talk or mention your company in your posts thats okay because noone can link you ...however I could then go to LinkedIn and find where you work therfore linking you to work Confused

Confusing.

I have everything locked down on my social media but I do think people do have a right to a personal life outside of work including their social media otherwise we are starting to go down the root of policing peoples thoughts.

ChaChaCha2012 · 24/09/2020 09:27

Report him. If he is expressing racist views then those views will also affect his decisions in the workplace, for instance in recruitment.

We don't tackle racism by staying silent.

Iamthewombat · 24/09/2020 09:29

You're not policing anyone's thoughts, though, are you? You're policing their actions.

What evidence does the OP have of this man having behaved in a racist manner? Writing his thoughts down doesn’t turn them into actions (and we still don’t know what he actually said! It might not have been racist since Anti BLM is not necessarily the same as racist).

As for the ‘beating up someone who said something to his kid’: the OP doesn’t know that that happened either. It might even have been a joke. In any event, if the police were not involved, it’s not up to somebody suggested as this man’s Facebook friend to report the incident to his employer. If the police were involved, his employer would know already.

fruitbrewhaha · 24/09/2020 09:32

But we don't know if his views were racist. OP hasn't said what he posted.

CloudyVanilla · 24/09/2020 09:35

I disagree with all the people on the first page. I think especially in the age of social media where hate, prejudice and discord are so easily spread and therefore easily able to hurt others, that we have a duty to stand against this type of rhetoric.

All the people in all the ages who have passively stood against injustice in the name of freedom, it think it's wrong. There is a difference between holding views, which no one can police, and acting on them. And posting racist shit on social media is a pathetic, passive aggressive way of acting on them.

raddledoldmisanthropist · 24/09/2020 09:38

I genuinely think everyone should be made to read 1984 so that they understand the very real danger of being the Thought Police...

Pretty sure some MNers have and were so uplifted by the happy ending that they decided it would make a brilliant model for society.

BlueJava · 24/09/2020 09:39

Personally I'd leave it and not raise it to work.

SoulofanAggron · 24/09/2020 09:40

Would he lose his job or get a telling off. I have seen him be unpleasant before and I feel like he should be pulled to task

If you've seen him do things you thought weren't ok at work then report him for whatever he did, rather than shitstirring because you already don't like the guy and also being the thought/FB police.

PonfusedCarent · 24/09/2020 09:42

Our company have a very strict social media policy meaning that anyone who puts this stuff on SM should expect reprimand. He is a representative of the organisation. Do organisations want to have violent racists working for them? No. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't want someone in the public sector displaying their underlying bias towards me when liaising with me either.

Racism is everyone's issue, so no, YANBU.

FOKKYFC · 24/09/2020 09:43

Posting one's thoughts on Facebook is indeed an action - you can be prosecuted for illegal written communications, after all, and you can be dismissed by your employer for behaviour that doesn't meet the criteria for prosecution at any rate.
I'm not saying these are - I don't know. I suspect they're not. But he might have to take responsibility for them regardless. Which shouldn't be a problem, if he believes what he's saying and can defend it.