To want a thread to acknowledge the effect Covid is having on single people?

[BooFuckingHoo2]

I’m not trying to be a competitive “my life is worse than yours” person, but all I seem to hear in the world around me (not just on MN) is about how tough Covid is on people with young kids, how they went stir crazy with homeschooling and how it’s terrible little Jonny can’t have his first birthday party.

I’m not denying that many families are having it tough, but I just want someone to acknowledge that it’s also extremely difficult for people who are single and childless not through choice. I feel like I’ve had at least 6 months of opportunity to meet a partner taken away, and with the current rules banning standing at the bar and social groups I don’t see that changing anytime soon. I’m not getting any younger and it feels like time is running out.

Again I know it must be tough, but I would love to have a husband and kids at the moment. Or maybe I’m being naive and the grass isn’t always greener

Why not just start a thread in being single in the time of Clovid19 instead of making it about how people work children are always getting all the attention

It must be tough op.

I honestly don't know what worse...being alone or never being alone?! . I guess it's difficult in different ways.

@tornadoalley

AIBU to wonder what attracted single childless women to a forum called Mumsnet? Men too for that matter. I've seen loads of threads about the difficulty dating and loneliness of lockdown

Yawn. No one has ever asked this penetrating question before.

OP, of course YANBU. There have been all kinds of different inflections of ‘very tough’ lockdowns.

I am happily single. I just wish to point out we aren't all struggling alone...!

@PollyPelargonium52

I am happily single. I just wish to point out we aren't all struggling alone...!

This is it, What's harder? Being single during lockdown when you couldn't see kettle bit could go out for walks out having a couple of kids and shielding so not leaving the house for months? It depends on the people What's harder? Being single but now being able to go to the pub and spend time with your friends and family or a couple of four youngish kids who might not see their parents and other family until next year now? It depends on the people.

Personally I've found it hard having a whirlwind child and two young babies but I know people have had it harder than me and people have had it easier. I've got friends with kids who have worked crazy hours to WFH and get everything done and single friends who haven't touched another person for months, or who haven't even seen another person for months. No one gets to decide as a blanket who had it harder.

I'm sorry you're struggling op, genuinely. But your do better to talk about YOU and your feelings than turn it into a "why do people with families get sympathy when all of their lives are better than mine"

There was a young woman from South Shields on the Radio 4 PM programme last night talking about this very situation very articulately. She had work and had friends, did 3 hour Zoom meet ups etc. But she described the loneliness and sameness of being alone evening after evening through lockdown, and the dread of that starting again now their area has been put back into no household mixing.

Might be worth a listen again.

I’m in a local lockdown area so I’m technically not allowed to go to the pub with friends or see anyone still.

I’m not saying I’ve got it “harder” than other people, like I said it’s not a competition. I suppose I just want people to acknowledge that it is incredibly difficult and lonely for single people because all I seem to hear is “god I’d love to have time to myself” or “the kids are driving me up the wall, I envy you having peace and quiet”.

Same storm different boats sums it up well i think. Aside from losing my job and my adult dd having to cancel her visit from her home abroad, I know in many ways i am lucky, with dh and dc at home, and my wider family nearby. Keep trying with online dating, there must be loads of people in the same position, with luck you will find the right one.

Agree. I'm not single, am married with one DS (and increasingly unlikelihood of having another). We were fine, and even very happy a lot of the time, but after it went on for months I started to 'feel' just how much I missed seeing our and DS's friends after school or at the weekends. He is ASD and thankfully wasn't nearly as upset about the lack of interaction with other children as some others were, but I could tell even he missed it a bit after a while.

I'm rambling. But, I empathise, OP

It's tough for everyone. I'm a single mum and I sympathise. The lack of adult contact is difficult. The lack of a partner to share the load makes it harder.

I try to cheer myself up knowing I am not in an at risk group, I'm healthy and this situation will pass, hopefully by next spring. But it's definitely a slog