To continue my gym membership?

[hobbyhobby]

Me and my DH have just fallen out over me continuing with my gym membership which I pay for out of my savings every month. It’s my only paid hobby and I use it extensively. During lockdown I suspended it and moved to online classes. I exercise most days apart from the weekend. A couple of years I was poorly, over weight and spent most days sleeping due to ill health. I brought myself back from the brink by using diet and exercise and I need this for my mental health and well-being. It’s something I do when the kids are at school and I rarely call on him to “childcare” so that I can use the gym. I’m struggling to see what the issue is. It’s not taking up my weekends or any evenings and it keeps me well and functioning. AIBU?

Was he happier when you were unwell and stuck at home?

The fact he is trying to insist on you doing the on line classes show it's about him wanting you inside the house where he knows exactly where you are.

What is he like about you going out by yourself to see friends and family?

Saying I’m selfish as he’s expected to look after the kids, shop and clean while I go to the gym. But that’s not true. I rarely ask him to look after the kids and only once since

But even he did have to look after kids, shop and clean, he should be happy to do so you get time to yourself.

Aren’t there times when you’re looking after kids, shopping and cleaning while he’s out?

He’s saying the kids are your sole responsibility so what’s the point of him?

You e got bigger problems than just your gym membership OP.

[quote hobbyhobby]@ToastyCrumpet he’s written me an angry email about it. Saying I’m selfish as he’s expected to look after the kids, shop and clean while I go to the gym. But that’s not true. I rarely ask him to look after the kids and only once since February so I could do an early yoga. Shopping I do on my way back from the gym. Cleaning gets done as and when. I’m not sure where to go from here. He’s completely angry and unreasonable.[/quote]
Tell him that no - you expect him to do his fair share of parenting and housework regardless of whether you go to the gym or not. The gym is irrelevant to that and if he has a problem contributing to parenting and the household then you have bigger problems in your relationship.

Reading your updates, he sounds controlling and vile. He does know they are his kids too right?