AIBU to ask how much you had to sacrifice to purchase your first property?

[Theegghashatched]

Sigh

I'm on year 3 of saving and it seems like were being faced with set backs after set backs!

Currently living with DPs parents (god bless them) and they have kindly allowed us to rent at a cheap price whilst we save the last few thousand of a deposit. We are both 30 so no spring chickens and this situation is far from ideal but hope that it will be short term pain for a long term gain!

DP has also had his hours cut considerably at work due to covid - this affects our income and we will now need to obtain a new mortgage in principle and determine how much this would affect what we can borrow.

I shouldnt moan I know we are in a far better position than others but I cant help but feel so so deflated!

So aibu to ask if you had to sacrifice a lot and if so; do you saying what?

Also how did it turn out for you? Was it a good decision and worth the sacrifices?

(Mine are ... living with dps partners and sacrificing our freedom, delaying TTC, minimising spending and buying second hand clothes, no holiday for the last 3 years)

Looking at these, I’m thinking we made all the same sacrifices - no holidays or very cheap, very old second hand car, limited nights out and clothes, second hand furniture -‘often free. We just did it after getting the mortgage and paying it at a rate we couldn’t really afford rather than by way of saving up beforehand.

Higher risk but I guess better for us as we got to invest in a property sooner.

A long time ago now, but I was desperate to get my own home after living in a HIMO with thieving anti-social gits.

I did all my sums, couldn't afford the mortgage, but went ahead anyway.
Best thing I ever did, but I became the world's leading expert on stretching 4oz of meat feed 2 people for 2 days.
I could teach Jack ?? a thing or two.

We bought our first house at 23 but on the flipside, we were 34 before we were ever able to afford a holiday.

I would have loved to have spent my 20s having some freedom and maybe travelling and socialising etc, but finances didn't allow. With hindsight we might have been entitled to housing benefit but I had never heard of it and didn't know that it was possible to get help with rent if you were on a low income. I just looked at the price of renting versus the price of a mortgage and thought that we had no choice but to buy a house if we wanted to live together.

Holidays, car, new clothes. When i moved in, the cheeky perishers had removed every lightbulb and all carpeting apart from a strip on the stairs! I made do with second hand things (no freecycle then) and managed bit by bit. Buying my little house was the best move i ever made. Good Luck.

By which I mean that I'm not entirely sure that it was worth it. Although it's obviously good now that we are middle aged.

I always had an extra part time job when I was saving up, in addition to my full time job. I used to work in a bar a couple of nights a week, it meant a bit of a 'night out' as well as earning more cash (& I met my DH there ). I never went on holidays, maybe stayed with friends in their home for a weekend, I was amazed when my 18 year old DS had a week abroad after A levels - paid for it himself. My first 'real' holiday was when I was married at 30!

PS; Yes, absolutely worth it - mortgage free by our early 40s.

We bought our first house at 21, costing £26,000! So not much really. That was 2002 though in a relatively deprived area of a northern city. DH has friends now who didn't settle so early because of various circumstances /preference and are really struggling to buy now, especially if they are also currently renting as there's not a lot of cloth to cut from anyway. Not sure how we'd manage if we were buying now.

Privacy I suppose, as I had to get a lodger - or chose to - to build up emergency savings as I had none after buying.

This was a long time ago, but dh and I were in a long distance relationship for close on 10 years until we had got everything together so I could move, and saving up for our house was part of that. He lived very cheaply during that time, walked everywhere, ate a lot of beans. We did spend money on fares to meet up twice a year but that was pretty well our only extravagance. Neither of us had a car, neither of us spent much money.

Very worth it, still in the house 27 years later, love it.

@user1497207191

*Oh and asking relatives for money for birthdays and christmas etc rather than gifts.

The question was about things you sacrificed - how does other people’s money come into it?

We bought our first house 2 years ago after 3 years together.

Before buying, DP lived in a grotty bedsit type thing where the landlady lived downstairs. I’m not 100% sure the living conditions were legal but it allowed him to save up a hefty deposit.
That meant we weren’t able to live together prior to buying a house because DP moving out of that hovel would’ve really affected his ability to save.

I still feel like I’m sacrificing some things to pay for the mortgage and doing the house up.
5 years in and we’ve still never been on holiday together (except for one or two long weekends in the U.K.).

I have a haircut maybe once every 9 months and don’t often buy new clothes/makeup etc.

Do I think it was worth it? Absolutely!
I live in the SE and the rent on the two bed flat I was living in was about £250 more a month than our mortgage is.
We’re not planning on selling for a while so the uncertainty in the housing market isn’t bothering us yet.

Saved while living with family. No phone, walked everywhere, no extravagant nights out or in, simple meals, worked all I could, bought the cheapest house we could find but it was a stretch. Really didnt mind living on a budget because we had quite a laugh without cash. 24 years later and 4 houses later (all needing work) we are in an amazing house north of Cheltenham

In the late 90s - no travel, no foreign holidays, no car, secondhand furniture, no phones (rare then to be fair), no eating out or takeaways, no tv packages, restricted social life, stayed living with parents whilst saving, only essential new clothes or shoes, looooong commutes to London to earn higher salary and studying in the evening to boost income.

Although house prices were lower, interest rates were far, far higher and lending criteria were tight (3 x single income or 2.5 x combined was fairly standard as a max amount you could borrow).

I lived in a country where 110% mortgages were perfectly normal. Found the house we liked, bought it and had a holiday as the mortgage was cheaper than our rent. This country needs to think differently about mortgages!

And my friends who didn’t buy in the late 90s are paying much more in rent then I do on my mortgage which ends in a couple of years. If they get a mortgage now they should hit 70 just paying it off.

Bought our first flat (with a hefty mortgage) at 38 after many years of renting and trying to save. The mortgage was much cheaper than the rent (£1450 p/m vs £1100) and we saved on our commute too. After two years we sold the flat and bought a house with a humungous mortgage. We sacrificed holidays, have a car that is almost 20 years old and mostly second hand furniture, and basically spent the absolute minimun needed to get by. We don't plan on moving anytime soon so we should finish the mortgage just before we retire.

I'm living off £30 a week to save enough for a deposit. Hopefully I will get there by next Summer. I'm praying for a house price drop.

I didn't really - BUT was back in 99

Didn't have a car so made sure the house was within walking distance of train station (was on our outerlimits as its 30 minute walk)

cut out any discretionary spending for a year. No holidays, meals, magazines, coffees, no parties where you had to bring a present, no clothes, nothing, lots of spaghetti and tomato sauce. I don't remember that year as being unhappy or stressful tbh. Honestly though I wouldn't have been prepared to live with in laws (and definitely not my own parents) as a sacrifice.

I didn't as bought in the 90s when houses were a lot cheaper.

I didn't have to give up anything really as i have moved up the ladder.

Bought my flat straight out of uni-had to give up a lot while living there as income was quite low, but managed.

Then bought a 2 bed with partner, only had to save 5% which was £10k, so didn't take long.

Then we've just moved into our final 4 bed home, having sold the other 2 properties. Again, didn't really need to change our lifestyle, daved as normal, as got decent equity from 2 properties.

I find my friends who are struggling are the ones who are going big to start, such as 3 bed house straight away.

If they had bought flats etc when younger and moved up ladder then you make money in each property (normally) which helps to boost deposit for next house.

I didnt go away to university. I went to a local uni and stayed living at home. Luckily my parents were happy to have me still there and I was only in my late teens.
I worked part time through university so that i could save my student loan and then used that as my half of the deposit.

Moved out of my rented flat to stay with my parents, no holidays, rarely ate out, packed lunches for work, did all the extra shifts I could manage, asked for things like clothes and makeup for birthday presents, used the library for books.

I still managed nights out but stuck to cheap drinks only (no food or fancy cocktails) and walked home rather than get taxis.

I didn't find it too much of a hardship to be honest, but I'm not someone who needs a lot of stuff anyway.

When I did get the property I fully finished it with cheap second hand items and didn't do any decorating beyond putting up a couple of posters. That saved me keeping money aside for after the deposit as I got everything for under £300

Bought my flat when I was 27 and I loved it to bits.