AIBU to ask how much you had to sacrifice to purchase your first property?

[Theegghashatched]

Sigh

I'm on year 3 of saving and it seems like were being faced with set backs after set backs!

Currently living with DPs parents (god bless them) and they have kindly allowed us to rent at a cheap price whilst we save the last few thousand of a deposit. We are both 30 so no spring chickens and this situation is far from ideal but hope that it will be short term pain for a long term gain!

DP has also had his hours cut considerably at work due to covid - this affects our income and we will now need to obtain a new mortgage in principle and determine how much this would affect what we can borrow.

I shouldnt moan I know we are in a far better position than others but I cant help but feel so so deflated!

So aibu to ask if you had to sacrifice a lot and if so; do you saying what?

Also how did it turn out for you? Was it a good decision and worth the sacrifices?

(Mine are ... living with dps partners and sacrificing our freedom, delaying TTC, minimising spending and buying second hand clothes, no holiday for the last 3 years)

I left a job I loved, I'm my home town to get a better paid one over 5hrs away and stayed there for a few years whilst I saved up. missed seeing my family a lot but i climbed property ladder, bought and sold a few times doing major refurbs on each one - so having long nights and stress after work sorting everything out for a number of years. now I'm back in hometown in my dream house and my career is much better for the moving around but it definitely hasn't been easy.

Holidays, privacy (had a lodger), clothes, fun, social life, time (it was a 1.5 hour commute for me), freedom (couldn't easily sell when prices crashed).

Was it worth it? Dunno - I suppose eventually it was - but it took a long time.

We sacrificed two years of free time - we both got high paying jobs with long commutes in order to save - we were both out of the house for 12 hours per day and too knackered at weekends to do anything fun.

Add into that 2 years of no holidays, and running two battered old cars, and not spending on new clothes.

Oh and asking relatives for money for birthdays and christmas etc rather than gifts.

But hell yes, it was worth it to be able to put down a decent deposit which meant less interest and lower repayments over the years for our "forever" home.

I'm not sure exactly when it becomes "worth it". I was quite careful not to stretch myself too badly when I bought (and things were a lot cheaper 20 years ago). I'm making over payments now to get the last bit paid off within the next 12 months. Maybe the pay back will be then. I think it's always a sacrifice paying a mortgage unless you have a very high paying job which alas I have never had.

You'll get there when you get there!

I'm 28 and also saving at the moment and in my final year of second my degree.

-I stopped buying any clothing almost three years ago.In the mean time I've only bought two items- running shoes and gloves as I lost mine and it gets cold where I live.
-Zero new make up and home decorations. ( I rent but things like prints, pillows etc)
-The last reading book I bought myself was in 2017 and I only use the library now.
-I eat out maybe once a month at the most- but the last time was in july .
-I still do the occasional coffee shop visit.
-After close to four years of therapy I've stopped going which is a large saving too.
-I used to
-I don't buy Christmas presents for my parents or my brother- only younger sisters now and I've bought their presents early which include nothing fancy but so far a small box of noodles, two bars of Tony's chocolate, a british bake off coloring book plus colouring pencils.
-I don't go to the cinema anymore either.
-I've cut my weekly food shop to £20 a week (I live alone).Sometimes I've spent a little bit more but nothing more than £25 since this school year began.

Always lived in cheap studenty style flats as a professional so I could save more. Didn’t go on holiday for three years. Used all the vouchers and only ever bought the cheap tickets. Hardly ever went drinking/dancing.

Bought the tiniest one bed flat in London. Still think it’s worth it because it’s MINE but mostly the banks

No holidays.
No new clothes or make up.
No hairdressing appointments.
Only ate out at cheapish places and for socialising (not because I couldn’t be asked to cook)
Had a few veggie meals a week to save money.
All my birthday and Christmas money went into the saving pot.

I was saving £500 a month which was about 25% of my take home pay. This went straight into the saving pot on pay day and I made do with what was left in my account until next payday.

We bought at 23. We "only" needed 11k to buy but were earning about 30k between us. We moved from Bath to a nearby town - no great problems there as I hated renting there for a year.

We didn't do holidays, got married 2 years after we bought instead of before. It was definitely worth it but we had to commit to a 5 year fixed deal at 7% which was A Lot, and we only managed to sell for what we paid.

The house we're in now has increased by 70k so there are benefits, 12 years on!

I don’t think I sacrificed much really. But it was ‘98, and you could buy a nice one bed flat in a nice area in the south east for fifty odd thousand.

Different world. I feel for those trying to buy today.

No holidays, old car, no social life, very few new clothes. Had a full time job and did overtime, a holiday and weekend job ( my main job was in teaching) and ran a small business. I lived at home, my mother did say on more than one occasion I was treating it more like a B&B because I was never there. I did spend money in the canteen on food because some days I wouldn't have got a hot meal otherwise!
Yes it was definitely worth it, I'm now Mortgage free after doing a couple of renovations, just run a business now at home and its fits around the 2 children. Hopefully will move and get a much bigger house mortgage free soon, as OH has a house with a lot of equity in it.

Oh I should add, this was back in the 2000s and I was renting a room at about £500 pcm too (bills all included). It’s so worth it as owning my own place means I have more freedom and more control over my life. I do feel for young people now as prices are even higher. I had a friend who wanted to buy her own place in London but ate out regularly in nice places, went on regular holidays and decided she didn’t want flatmates anymore so was renting a studio. I was hardcore and it’s hard sometimes when you see your peers having a better time than you and you feel your youth is passing you by.

I guess it depends where you are and how much you need. Houses where I am were starting on about 60k for the ones in a good state. So with 5% it's not really that bad.

We did lots of extra hours to push the savings when we decided to buy. So sacrificed free time.

Worth it. I like being the boss of it😂

We had £25k due to DH’s dad passing away when he was a child and leaving him the money, we then had to save £10k ourselves and we did that in a year by living with my parents and basically never going out. Allowed us to buy a 2 bed flat in a cheap part of SE London, which was a do-er upper. We then spent £15k on it over 3 years, which was more affordable as our mortgage payments were lower than our rent had been before moving in with my parents. So I guess our sacrifices were: a year of our lives plus three years living in a building site, and of course DH’s dad not being around

I don’t regret it as it as I feel more stable and we’re now selling the flat having made a little money on it by renovating, which is allowing us to buy a house nearer family outside London (recently had our first DC so priorities have changed!) But it was hard going even with the inheritance covering half our costs, and factoring in that most of our spending on the place came after we’d moved in in the form of the renovations (it was a hovel...). It was a good way to get on the ladder though and I’d recommend it to anyone young and energetic enough to take on a project - I was both of those things back then, I am neither now!

To be fair I should also point out that we didn’t run a car during that time, but tbh no one we know in London does so it didn’t feel like a cut back as we’d never had one!

Oh and we specifically moved into bit cheaper flat so teh difference went towards the deposit.

We were able to save and also rent, which was lucky. So we didn't have to live with parents or anything. We did watch what we spent though. We managed to save enough for a deposit and we also had our first dc when we were still renting. I was glad we had waited till then to have a baby, as I honestly was astonished at how expensive it turned out to have a baby, as we had zero help from family (still the case now and always has been). Childcare was more than I realised, which, looking back was extremely stupid of me! I just thought "ah everyone manages" . Having a Sartrean moment here, looking back and thinking "what a tit"!

Anyway, not too much of a sacrifice to afford a house, but we have sacrificed a lot to have the sort if income where we didn't have to sacrifice a lot to save for a deposit....if you can work that out. We live far from my family and get no help from DH's, so that is another sort of sacrifice. If we had lived with my parents, for example, on lower incomes, we then would have had more help with dcs, so, swings and roundabouts really.

Holidays. New clothes and shoes. Bought a second hand car and ran it till the head gasket went. Got the bus instead of taxis, basically I lived like a student when I was earning like a professional. It was 100% worth it and I still have that mentality now to some degree.

Although I do splash out on the occasional nice thing here and there now.

We just had to get someone at our chambers (self employed barristers at the time) to estimate our income at the time! Ridiculous! And then the bank went off out gross. We had a minimal deposit, some of which I think was also borrowed!

This was in 2006.

I suppose we had to be careful with what we spent then in all areas to be able to pay the mortgage, which would probably have been said to be unaffordable to us now.

I need to add that our income was low at the time - but then lent to us based on gross which is ridiculous. And the gross figure (about twice the net in that profession) was still low.

No holidays
Lived in a house share for 4 years rather than renting by myself.
Didn’t follow now DH abroad when he got posted there for 2 years as it would have meant me quitting a better paid job for a lower paid one
Very few new clothes, little social life.

Yes... it was definitely worth it. Bought first house 10 years ago, aiming to have mortgage paid off in another 3 years (now sacrificing to overpay mortgage by 100% each month).

Back in the late 80s
No holidays other than U.K. camping
Not eating out
Running old banger cars
Delaying ttc
Had a lodger to help pay the mortgage - 15%+ interest rates
Second hand and borrowed furniture

A year or two of no holidays and not going out. Now envisaging 5 years of same to get it paid off early (want retirement sooner) - I think maybe focus on retirement with no housing costs op?

Nothing really. Housing is cheap where I am though and I'm not particularly fussy.

I don't own a car because I can't drive, walk to work so have no commuting costs which helped. My house only cost £100k and I've no plans to ever move again.

Still went on holidays etc while saving.

Oh yes, had a lodger initially too