To think a combined salary of 60k is really comfortable?

[BathedInLavender]

OUTSIDE of London. But still in the South East. This isn't a conversation about London because that obviously won't go very far there full stop.

AIBU to think a combined salary of 60k is actually comfortable and not 'meh' at all.

DH earns 30k, I earn the same but I'm part time so it's less because of pro rata. We aren't struggling by any means. If I returned to FT we would have a lot more spare cash, and we have a fair bit now. We don't have cheap housing costs, £900per month just on that.

I spend a lot of money on ridiculous crap and we holiday every year with DC.

It's not bad money if you're not paying out for an excessive mortgage or rental costs, I'd say.

@BathedInLavender

Let me articulate why I think we're comfortable... If the boiler brakes down, we'd have emergency funds to pay for it. DS can do activities without me questioning costs of it all. I can do my food shop and not question the expense. I can pop in to little shops I like and buy a few bits. School uniform buying isn't a scare. If DS was of school age and said I needed to bring in cakes, I can whip to the shops and pick whatever I think will suit. If I needed to do a coffee morning contribution, I could grab it all at M&S. If school shoes needed replacing, I'd just replace. If I fancied lunch out, I'd just go etc

So what you're still is you're able to spend what you want (within reason) and not think about it too much? I would say yes then you are comfortable, i am the same, DH and I take home slightly more but we are able to save too. However its all relative, depends on what you want from life, long term goals, how materialistic you are etc. I mean thinking about it there are things i want that i cant afford but i would still consider ourselves comfortable

@BathedInLavender which is why I said it depends where in the southeast in an earlier post ;) £900 flats are seriously rough in our part - around £1200 its getting decent. Houses start at around £500000, and that is mid terrace. But everything else with a decent commute to work is even more expensive...

DH earns just over 60K and I am currently a SAHM with another on the way. We are fine, we own a house and manage each month month (though we cannot afford holidays). I do think it's slightly unfair that we don't qualify for child benefit or anything because the salary is all earned by one person - despite paying more tax. I'll probably get bashed for this so let me pre-empt that if I can: yes, we are very lucky and no, I'm not saying we need money from the tax payer. And I am certainly not blaming or criticising OP! I'm just saying it does make us less well off than a couple earning the same but in two salaries, and I'm not entirely sure that's fair.

I’d struggle on that because I’ve been used to much more and because I was paid close to £30k in my grad scheme over a decade ago, it doesn’t seem much for someone with lots of experience. But, I recognise I was in a bubble, not everyone will have that earning potential etc. Also, I’d struggle because I have very high mortgage and nursery fees which are choices.

If you are not worrying about money on a day to day basis then you are comfortable as you have learned to live within your means and more importantly are happy doing so.

I think maybe having one child is making your lifestyle affordable. If you decided to have another it might not be affordable?

If you want to buy in a better area for a particular catchment could you? Is there equity in your current home?

I think we are driven by consumerism and striving for bigger or better. If we all just stopped and were happy with what we had, we would be happier overall. It sounds like you are in that place already OP.

That's what we earn. After our mortgage, childcare, gas, electricity, car, internet and food we don't have much left. We definitely can't afford a second child until the first is at school. I feel like we are lucky in the scheme of things but it could very quickly go wrong. We live in an expensive city though, where the living wage is £10 an hour at least.

We are in the shires and probably earn about that and I would say we are comfortable and live a good life. We treat ourselves when we fancy and have lovely holidays although they are probably cheaper than other people’s.

We don’t buy stuff for the sake of it though and don’t waste food...

Well haven't RTFT but generally I agree with you, however:

You only have 1 DC and it sounds like your DC is young? That makes a difference.

£900 not that much for a mortgage. Rent for a 3 bed terrace where I am (not near London, not at all posh) would be more like £1400.

We have slightly more income, closer to £70k, and for the time when both DC were in pre school or nursery we just about broke even.

Yabu

I wouldn't call 60k combined really comfortable.

We don't have huge outgoings either.

I kind of agree and kind of not. I earn less than this and still live what I perceive as a fairly comfortable lifestyle but I don't mind a battered car and the odd fairly cheap holiday- the things I like to do are have takeaways and buy what I like day to day.

Obviously having one child make a huge difference though, it's half the costs in terms of nursery/wrap around care, clothes, extra-curricular- you say you spend a fortune on DS but everyone who has money spends it on their kids! Computers, bikes, I don't save for that stuff, I just get it.

I have recently started to earn a little bit more, and don't have quite so many bills, and the difference in spending money and my more relaxed feeling about money is really quite huge. It's only a few hundred a month extra but it's a big psychological difference, before that I used to have to think about money a lot each month to make sure we didn't spend too much, now I am not thinking about it day to day (for larger purchases, still yes).

I think you are doing fine on that salary. You seem very organised with money, managing a mortgage and a nice holiday every year with some over to fritter. Not everybody manages that on a similar salary but that could be because of temporary extra expenses like nursery or being more careless than you. I wish my daughter had the same. She earns more than half of your total..£40000 ...but her dh is a househusband and it is very tight. No extras. Just a little above the ctc and wtc cut off for her household so nothing extra coming in. That is tight for budgeting but she does it, so I agree with you, that extra £20000 coming it would feel very comfortable to her.

Erm, can just say that veryone on here is not a high earner! You can see that from plenty of other threads on money / relationships etc. This thread has just attracted people with money - relatively speaking - (not a criticism) . I earn loads less than salaries being discussed but I feel quite comfortable compared to others in society (own home / have education & skills).

I’d struggle on that income with our current setup. I have 2 DC and they cost much more as they get older. Even taking into account the child care savings, the cost of clothes, shoes, clubs/team activities, food shopping and food outside the home far outweigh their costs when little

Maybe I'm not a high earner because my typing is rubbish - veryone?

I'm genuinely very comfortable and think we have good disposable income

YANBU then?

We can’t live on it, and that’s in the midlands. But everything is relative. Our mortgage is small at £700 but we have nursery fees and high travel costs and a horse. I had her when I was young, free and single, she’s now old so can’t be sold and she’s part of the family. But in truth I can’t really afford her with a baby. When she dies she won’t be replaced until our childcare costs drop.
Our basic outgoings are £3900 a month. We earn £4000 net. It’s grim, we have a large credit card balance on 0%.
But we also have a BTL and I have a stonking pension (HE) so we’ll be fine in the long term, just cash poor now.

Thing is if the 60k is fairly new and you used to be in more it'll seem a lot. If it's been static for a while it'll seem comfortable. If it's a drop from 90k it'll be tight for most people because you cut your cloth accordingly.

The problem with threads like these is you're happy on 60k but they're are plenty of people who will come on to ask how you manage to keep a roof over your head on such a low wage and show pity at your hard life. Which won't make you feel good.
Then there's those who manage on much less that will be agahst and judgemental at you for even questioning it, which isn't going to make you feel good and they're getting proxy pity because if you're life is considered basic and inadequate in 60k what is theres in 40k or 20k or 14k.

The only ones may come out feeling good already feel good because they're earning 6 figures

Wouldn't be comfortable for me. And I live about 30mins outside the M25, almost in Suffolk. We like to eat out regularly, go on a few holidays a year, drive nice cars etc. I find it all adds up.

It’s just entirely subjective. Your salaries are fine and cover the basics and a bit more. Of course that’s a comfortable life, one where you aren’t worried about every last penny and living hand to mouth.

Living standards have increased massively since even I was growing up in the 80s. Families spend a lot more now. Young professionals spend a lot more. Our society is infinitely more consumerist. Electronic devices, foreign holidays, domestic help: these things are common place when they would have been the preserve for “rich” people in the 70s/80s.

If you are the sort of person who is happy with bike rides for leisure with a weekly takeaway and books from the library, fair play to you and you won’t need much to feel comfortable. Other have grown accustomed to greater profligacy and feel the pinch if they have to sacrifice tennis lessons or shopping spree. Everyone’s definition of comfort is different.

All entirely subjective. Good for you that £60,000 covers you. It wouldn’t touch the sides for us but that is because we’re used to having a lot more to play with.

Good for you op 🤷‍♀️

I'm staggered that anyone thinks this isn't ok, outside of London. pp said 'it isn't comfortable'. Seriously?

I think you are doing well with your spending control OP, to have that lifestyle on that income.

And the point is?

Hahahaha. Me and my partner earn half that between us. We have a great life so no complaints but.. mumsnet is ridiculous.

OP you're not allowed to feel happy or confident in your lifestyle choices on AIBU, if you'd have posted "our household income is £60,000 and I don't think it's enough" you'd be slaughtered and all the posters who have lived on £10,000 a year would tell you you're practically in the 1%

It's above average, it's all relative, but that should say something.