How do people relax in huge houses?

[mrsbeeton999]

It’s probably something I’ll never need to worry about but I’ve just been looking at a bit of property porn - huge houses with indoor pool, gym, cinema room. I think I’d never be able to have a relaxing swim in the basement or shut myself in the cinema room as I’d be worried about security in the rest of the house. In my house I can pretty much see all the house from the lounge and it’s easy to check front and back door are locked. I know some people have staff but not everyone in these houses would. I don’t think I’d feel confident swimming or watching a film if I was home alone.

@Suzi888

I’m not afraid of burglars really, but read and watch too many scary things!

This! I really read the wrong sort of books, usually with a murderer hiding in the attic or cellar.

You have a secure boundary, motion detectors and perimeter alerts and an full height gate with intercom.

It's not worrying at all although I would get spooked at 2am if they went off in high winds. A lifetime ago now, I miss the isolation and having no neighbours.

Have you seen the true-story film The Bling Ring about a group of teenagers that used to break into celebs' houses in Hollywood and steal their stuff? Apparently the grounds were so large that the celebs often didn't bother (or remember) to lock the doors into the garden. They used to hop over the perimeter fence and then just walk in, steal and walk out again. If no one was home, they'd try on all the designer clothes. Creepy.

We live in a big house not a giant one but big enough to lose children in and we do have huge gardens surrounded by fields and trees . I found it a bit daunting when we first moved here because it was so dark at night it did feel like anyone could be out there (we'd come from the city centre) . But you get used to it and relax with time. We have sensors on the doors so they beep when they are opened it's not so much for intruders more so I know when the kids have disappeared outside.

The employ professional security firms who install sensor alarms, CCTV and DOG patrols.

My best friend has this type of house and I have the code to the gate/door etc. One day I was meeting her at hers and she was delayed so I was waiting on the drive and got the kids out the car. She had a call from the security company saying, ‘someone is on the drive who we weren’t aware was coming but they’re having a handstand competition so we’re not overly concerned’ 😂

Many years ago when I was a newly qualified nurse I earned extra money staying overnight with a very old lady in a huge old house. The front door was left open for me to go in when I arrived and I locked it behind me always terrified that someone was already in the house. I wasn’t particularly easily scared in those days but the house creaked and groaned all night and I eventually decided the money wasn’t worth the stress and gave it up.

@Duvetdweller hilarious!

I think this depends on where the house is.. I believe burglars follow people in nice cars (think Aston Martins, Porches and Tesla Model X) to find out where they live. If they flash the cash on a car, they're likely to have jewellery, watches and money at home.

Where I live, breaking in for car keys is a major risk as well.

Thankfully having a standard, non desirable car, I'm pretty safe on this front.

This is exactly why I like living in a fairly anonymous house in a fairly anonymous surrounded by neighbours! Also I'd hate to have staff hanging round or dog patrols turning up!

Dogs

I have a house that is large but not enormous. It's made of two cottages joined together and the internal layout is like a maze. Front door on one side, and the staircase on the other side with rooms and doors in such a position you need to do a bit of a zigzag to get through. I thought I'd be anxious there but the answer is pets! Creaky old floors sound very noisy with our menagerie and any noise I hear I put down to them.

We're on a private road in woodland and the next houses are out of earshot.

But we have gravel outside every window and security lights.

So it's pretty impossible to sneak around the outside of the house.

Because it's so quiet here any new noise is quite easily heard so I think that makes me feel a lot more secure as I'd definitely hear someone.

That being said I don't have a pool or cinema but I would feel nervous in a room such as those where you can't hear things.

Sort of like how I don't like wearing earphones or hoovering home alone as I might not hear something.

@FishPalace

"Gosh, @Xenia, you're losing your touch. You got in the house and staff, but forgot to mention in this post that all your five children were privately educated from the age of five at schools were entrance was based on an IQ of 120 or above. And probably tested for 'scaredy cat' qualities, too."

You missed a bit. Privately educated in single sex schools!

Well @Xenia one could always climb in through the cupola, eh?

I would hate to live in a big house for that reason, and also the cleaning and maintenance. Even if you had staff to do it you'd still have to manage it all.
DH and I are currently discussing our next move. He wants a remote house in the country, but I'd never be able to be alone overnight - overactive imagination and have watched too many horror films. I'd keep picturing zombies coming up the driveway.
Also I grew up in a capital city (not Uk), high crime rate - people had steel doors and mum used to put a ladder against the door, so if someone broke in it would make a racket. I still can't sleep until I've double checked that the door's locked.
I also need street light coming through the window and the sound of cars in the background to fall asleep. We live in a built up urban area now and I feel right at home. I couldn't live in a big house in the middle of nowhere, where it's all silent at night.

I live in a large country house surrounded by fields and forest (inherited from biological parents-I promise I'm not a tory) and the first year or so was terrifying- 6'8 hairy biker dh didn't even like to stay at home alone and we'd fight over who had to lock up at night. We're more used to it now but the windows in our bedroom look over the forest and I can't bear to look out at night in case someone's looking back in. We have a great security system so technically we're safe from crime but it's still a bit heebie-jeebie inducing.

I.hate being home.alone in our 3 bed semi, I couldn't cope with a country mansion at all..it's something I think about a fair bit. If I ever end up alone for good in the future what would I do? I think a flat would be the best option for me, just for having people around. The burglar stories on here really scare me

I am not the only person on the thread to say they live in a big house and I did say it was nothing like as big as a castle (or indeed many mentioned no the thread). My perfect times are alone which are so rare.

You can still make a large house feel homely. My house is 8000 square feet and it’s well-laid out and comfortable. During Covid times, I have loved having a full gym, playroom, cinema room and a couple of spare bedrooms for office space.

I grew up in a small three-bed semi, and always felt it was too noisy and too hard to find a comfortable corner to relax.

I think that if I had infinite means, I'd choose a 3 bed central London flat with an onsite gym and pool and 24 hour concierge and security. I might probably also purchase a country mansion but only for entertaining friends at weekends, thus never being alone in it.
I too am like the pp - I hate the silence and love feeling close to humanity. Just the sound of cars passing is comforting - I could go weeks without speaking to someone.
Oh to dream!

I don’t have a big house but I do have a home cinema, it is in a double converted garage that is separate to the rest of the house. I leave the main house unlocked when I go to the home cinema, never given it a moments thought. I don’t really understand your point about being able t see everything, you presumably can’t when you go to the loo or for a shower either.

My parents used to have a huge house. Once while they were away, there was a power cut in the night and (unbeknownst to me) it reset the stereo back to radio, which I'd forgot to turn off earlier.

I heard music in my half asleep state and suddenly realised it was coming from in the house! It freaked me out more than hearing a window smash as I thought somebody had broken in and was fucking with me!

I find large houses echo and feel like an airport hanger so I dont like them but can't say i ever thought about them from a security aspect i just like cosy houses

@DiggerDave

My parents used to have a huge house. Once while they were away, there was a power cut in the night and (unbeknownst to me) it reset the stereo back to radio, which I'd forgot to turn off earlier.

I heard music in my half asleep state and suddenly realised it was coming from in the house! It freaked me out more than hearing a window smash as I thought somebody had broken in and was fucking with me!

This has just reminded me! One night, I was just recently living alone after a break-up of a long relationship. I was woken up in the night by voices coming from downstairs - this was in a tiny 1-bed house. I was petrified and lay there wondering what to do but then after a while I realised it must be the TV. I was really befuddled and couldn't figure out why a burglar would put the tv on so I eventually persuaded myself I needed to go and check on it. I crept downstairs and it was the fucking cat!! She was sitting with her paw on the remote control and had turned the tv on and given me a heart attack. 😆

@LongPauseNoReply That security system sounds very advanced. What would I need to Google for it to come up? I like the sound of that (smaller scale of course!)