To mention how I feel to my manager?

[bleuu]

Possibly outing, but I feel a bit annoyed about this and I need MN to tell me if I'm being u.

I had a DS last year and received no acknowledgment from my workplace. No cards, no gifts, hardly any congratulations. For background, I have worked at this company for a good few years.

Another colleague on my team is expecting and has received lots of gifts, cards etc.

I just feel totally shitty about this and I don't know if I should just mention how I feel.

AIBU or should I just let it go?

The only fair way to raise it imo would be to mention it to a colleague that you trust and think would highlight it for you.
You could phrase it like oh I remember when I went on leave to have Damien. I can't remember what we did on the last day though. I hope Ellie enjoys her time off.
Try to not make it about you, but include the fact that your memory isn't great about what happened back then. Might work, might not. At least you've broached the topic though.

There's no easy way to do it really though.

It's hurtful and worse than that if the manager was the one who started the collection. But I wouldn't complain to the manager about it. You could raise gifts and collections as a general policy, if you have a staff survey or something like that that could be fed back preferably anonymously (but mention your own experience and that it was done by the manager) to human resources department or to an outsourced employee support service, if they have that: What should the policy be; drawbacks such as too many demands of people's pockets; some feeling left out and therefore dispiriting for those individuals and bad for morale and team spirit.

Don't complain. It is unfair and hurtful, but there's no good outcome from complaining. They aren't your mates, just colleagues. Treat it as just a workplace and put your energy into your real friendships instead.

Maybe drop hints for a few weeks before? if it bothers you that much that is.

I once worked for a company who collected money of everyone for birthdays, babies, weddings and leaving dos.
I worked there for about 3 years and contributed to all the above for about 25-30 colleagues. On my last day nothing, nobody even came to say goodbye. it was because my workspace (cupboard) was off to the right and out of the way with one other person who had already left the company so an empty desk, everyone else worked in big offices down the corridor the other way. So people forgot to speak to me.

Maybe they are just more fond of her

Its work, they are not your friends or family..YABU and childish. Probably why you got no gift.

People usually get a good present for leaving/maternity etc. If they have a good mate that is inclined to arrange a collection very enthusiastically.

One colleague that most people didn't think that much of had a fantastic leaving present, due to one of there friends really Getty enthusiastic about the collection.

Not sure you can really complain as a collection isn't s contractual right!!

Personally I hate work place collections. I am always been asked to fig deep for so and SO's leaving present (who I barely know).

But I regularly leave a job without s leaving present (admittedly I am a contractor, but some of my contracts have lasted several years). It is really annoying, particularly as I give to other people's leaving gifts/charity collections etc. etc.

It might be better if work place collections were banned.

I'm sorry but I think you would embarrass yourself by speaking to your manager and what can it achieve?

You said earlier: I genuinely feel like I'm not cared about at all.

To be honest, a work environment isn't really the place to feel cared about, that's for your friends and family.