AIBU to let 14yo DD go on a day trip to London?

[MoFoFlo]

It's DD's 14th birthday soon and she's said she would like to go to London for the day with her best friend who's 15. We're in Manchester, so a 2 hour train ride away. They're planning to go to Oxford Street and Covent Garden to go shopping and visit a cafe they've seen on Instagram. Both girls are pretty sensible, used to big cities and have been to London with parents several times.

I would have done this sort of trip in my early teens and am more than happy for her to go. However, DH thinks she's too young and it's too dangerous .

Would you let your 14 year old go?

I have a 14 year old. Am on the relaxed end of the spectrum but I would go too though leave them to it so not hang about with them all day.

[quote Healththrowaway199]@Comefromaway I don’t know what year your experiences are from but that isn’t the case. The train companies arrange the taxis or hotels themselves, it will already be paid for so you wouldn’t be asked for payment at all. You just need to speak to the right people eg station staff or train station help points. Don’t get me wrong, you can pay yourself and claim later if you want to but you don’t have to.[/quote]
October 2019.

I have a 14yo and no, I wouldn't let her. She can be very immature though especially around friends.

Can they use london transport ok?

I’ve moved out of London (not far). Ds was used to tube with me but cannot seem to use a flipping train! So he can’t get there 🤣🤣.

London pretty depressed right now - if you not sure, say no and pack them off somewhere else?

Have they ever been to London when there’s been an issue like train cancellations? Or in general, have they ever had to deal with something like that?

If so, and they were fine, then yes.

If not, go with them. Different carriage, don't speak from the minute you get on the train and just arrange to meet up twenty minutes before the train home. On hand if issues, but plenty of independence too.

Yes I would. I live in central London. If you want my mobile number for them to have in case of emergency I'm happy to oblige. Or come with them and we can do lunch 😁

The taxi couldn’t even get to the Unmanned station. We had to wade through flood water under a railway bridge to reach the main road. Some locals had come to help. Those who managed to get to Stafford were faced with no available taxis or hotels.

I would let my 14 year old if he had a sensible friend with him.

Is she familiar with London? Has she taken the train, negotiated the underground, manage to find her way around on her own before? Going with patents who do all the figuring out is totally different to doing it on your own.
My daughter wouldn't want to do it. My son would and did. I flew from the other side of the world, found the train from the airport and got across London to Cambridge at 14. No mobiles then either!

London is no more dangerous than Manchester.

The issue is more around if there are train issues between Manchester and London.

I'd have no issue with them going to covent garden and Oxford Street but if there was sudden disruption to the train service home, that could be an issue.

Do you know any friends/family in London who could be an emergency contact/place to stay if it did happen?

If so, I'd be more comfortable with that.

Or you also have a day in London (separate from them) but are booked on the same train home (sitting apart).

Intercity train journeys are key routes through large towns/cities so much less likely to be abandoned at a small unmanned station in a storm than on some local branch line.

No,

Yes yadbu.

For lots of reasons.

No. It's too far, and would take you too long to get to them if they needed you for any reason.

I'd go along with them but seated separate on the train, help them with the underground then entertain myself in London for the day before meeting them for the return journey.

Or, even better, try to book a cheap travel lodge or premier inn, so they can have two days.

@Comefromaway right, so you’re definitely mistaken as the TOC would have paid. You didn’t have to pay upfront

Why not. I started going with my mates at around 13.

They are hardly heading into Hackney. London is pretty straightforward and fun. Just train them to keep safe from pick pickets (less of an issue during covid).

I wouldn't i think 14 is a bit to young.

It’s not danger really it’s that we would be 2 hours away if there was an issue. Dd and her friends fine in our small city and the larger city half an hour away but not quite familiar enough with London to enable me to let them especially if a trip we promoted involving other people’s kids... probably fine by 15

Well they didn’t pay. There was no one to sort it. And we were on the Virgin London to Liverpool. Trains were stacked up unable to go any further. The option was given to either stay on the train for an indefinite period of time/overnight or leave at the unmanned station and attempt to get home.

At Euston with the cancellations people were just told to wait, it was confusing. The were being told to get on trains which werecthen cancelled. There was no toilets or food/water on the train and people didn’t dare get off in case it left. Difficult for an adult never mind a child.

No
Only because it's so far and they've not been before

At 14 I'd been to London and could work my way on the tube and knew roughly where I was
At 16 I was going through london every weekend

I would allow it but I am quite relaxed.

But I also like the suggestions others have made that you travel down with them and do you own thing and then meet up on the way home. I think a day out in London alone would be wonderful.

I would but we are only a 30 minute train journey away. I don't think I would from Manchester, it seems too far if something goes wrong.

Not in the present times, where you have to book a specific train, and all the other things you need to do.

Have they been to Liverpool (or similar Northern city) on their own a few times? If yes, fine. If not, No. As if they can manage to travel around a nearby cities a few times with no problems they can manage London.

I'm saying this as a Londoner who has lived in the NW simply because Londoners are not as friendly as Mancs including station staff and if they have problems they will be stuck.

Both girls are pretty sensible, used to big cities and have been to London with parents several times

I would let them go. Make sure they take a power pack in case their phone battery dwindles.

I was going youth hostelling for 5 days at this age, and travelling to London from the Midlands for concerts. 14 year olds are really very capable and not as helpless as we think.

If they get themselves round Manchester on the various types of public transport they can manage London.

If they’re usually fairly sensible, not scatty types who are constantly losing everything (purses, phones) then yes, I’d let them.

At 13 my dd and a school friend did a day trip from London to Calais on their own. OK, very different times (no mobile phones!) and both I and the other mother did say no way at first, and were nervous wrecks until they were safely home again, but it was fine and they thoroughly enjoyed their adventure - and practising their French.
I doubt very much that I’d allow it now, but Calais is rather a different matter from London.