To think my neighbour is an idiot

[Happyinmyownworld]

He lives opposite. 40s. Was in a same sex relationship with a pensioner. They split. He now lives alone. I parked my car on the road outside his house legally years ago. He swore at me and a male member of my family had words with him about it being perfectly legal and not to speak to a women like that again. The police came around. The police agreed with us and it ended. He's remained silent for years but he's a typical curtain twitcher. Stuck a note on my dad's friends work van too years ago. My dad's friends 6ft 7 and a gentle giant. But it's like this guy thinks he can square up to anyone.

House up road is having a porch built. The chaps doing it are travellers/gypsys Working long days and keeping the street tidy. One knocked on lots of doors yesterday including mine. Perfectly polite. Left his card. Thanked us and left. Lady over the road has decided to have a drive put in. They were onto it last night bringing things around. I saw the man opposite start shouting at the man. He was trying to reassure him his wall would not be damaged. Then the stroppy git shouted I work for the council & stormed in his house. Rang his ex who came around with his new husband. They looked the workmen up and down. Slept over at his house. Used their cars to block the area around his house this morning. He's gone to work and his mum and ex are guarding the house. I took my kids out and one of the work lads spoke to my little lad about the digger. I spoke to him about this bloke and he said he was really difficult and was really rude. He said you meet people from all walks of life and should be polite. I then told him to use my drive for his truck and he was really greatful and thanked me.

I am sick of this man thinking because he works for the council he rules the world. I honestly am annoyed at how he's behaved. The people having work done have a really overgrown garden and it's nice for them to get it sorted. Now he's causing them stress.

I feel like ringing the council and asking them if he's entitled to abuse people in his role. Because he's always doing so!

If the workmen felt intimidated, threatened etc they could report it themselves.
If the person who is getting the work done feels intimidated or whatever again it's down to them. Although someone has called the police.

You assume the ex was round there because of the workmen issue, whereas it could have already been a planned visit.

I'm surprised that if he's as bad as you claim, police called out multiple times etc, that the other residents haven't got together and put in a complaint with the anti social behaviour department or whatever about him. With all the crime numbers you all must have amounted, he would have been issued with warnings etc.

I'm retired now, but it would have been a disciplinary offense to use your 'title'/job to throw your weight around or intimidate someone. And that went for everyone from the highest mucky-muck to the lowest on the totem pole.

But, all in all this situation really doesn't involve you, it involves your neighbours so I'd advise you to pretty much keep your nose out of it. If your neighbours want to pursue something you can tell them you're willing to be a witness to what you've actually seen and heard, but other than that, leave them to it. They may not want to stir the pot, that is their decision.

Maybe if you spent less time curtain twitching yourself you wouldn't be too bothered and could just get on with your own life.

Ironic. Women defending a man who is abusive to women. Men. workers. Shouts about being in the council.

But yes it's me who should of got out of my car and told him to fuck off. Wow. Let's hope you have more compassion for women in violent relationships and women who are raped.

Well your mother should have taught you how to fight men...

You have all fed of each others idiocy in this post. I hope none of you have daughter's.

Yes my brother looks out for people he loves. So does my dad and all the other men in my family. Not with violence. But they were raised to respect people and especially women. I was also told to respect people and always have. There's really never any need to be horrible to people. But you defend the poor man who's abused people for years and wastes police time when he gets scared.

Inviting men around gay or not to try intimidate men trying to work is wrong whether they are gypsy or not
Were they scared by the gay pensioner looking them up and down OP?
🤣🤣

If he's using his status as a council employee to bully people and abuse them, then it's certainly legitimate to tell the council - he's bringing them into disrepute which is probably against their rules.

You are a bit over invested in this guys life. You know every move he makes.

If I had said wife you wouldn't have reacted. So whys it any different that his ex is male? Isn't that you focusing on his sexuality?*

No one would have batted an eye if you had said his ex husband came round to annoy the builders, but the way you worded it was strange.

I have lots of compassion for women who are raped and are in abusive relationships, I also have a daughter
I am teaching her not to focus on people’s sexuality and not to be nice to people based on that. I am also teaching her that treating everyone with respect ( even gypsies) should be a given and not something to brag about.
I am also teaching her to stand up for herself and be assertive enough to either fight her own battles or judge a situation to be dangerous and extricate herself from it rather than go running to the nearest man for help.
Nobody thinks your neighbour isn’t an idiot but based on your posts some people think the 2 of you could form a club.

Wow this thread has it all. Gay pensioners, travellers, overprotective brothers!

A guy decided to block me in years ago using his car on one side and his work van on the other. I got his work company name off the van and sent them a pic of what he had done with the van reg visible and 10 mins later he was out moving the van. He used company property to bully me, f@ck him, if you tried to talk to him you just got abuse so I didn't lower myself to his level.

I'm not sure it's the neighbor only, who is a piece of work .

If he’s used the sentence “I work for the council” whilst out causing trouble then yes I’d definitely ring them and tell them what he’s getting up to! He sounds like an absolute nightmare and I wouldn’t be tolerating him speaking to any of my kids or family like that!

I don't see what his sexuality has to do with anything.

@Happyinmyownworld

It's ok. People have gone of track completely. Not about his sexuality. Nice to gypsies? No I'm nice to people! All people unless they give me a reason. Which most don't! Why wouldn't I be nice to him? He's not robbing people. He's working long hours to earn money. I would be pissed off if he was being horrible to anyone trying to do their job.

I'm not wasting anymore time on this thread that has been completely twisted into a homophobic post.

My windows face into the street so my eyes and ears can see angry shouting outside. Ofcourse I'm going to listen. What if it got violent?

I am sure everyone has heard things outside the house before.

Thanks for the sensible replies. I am going to report him as yes he does have a council vehicle and he's an intimidating bully. Inviting men around gay or not to try intimidate men trying to work is wrong whether they are gypsy or not. Simple.

Well said. Good luck, let's hope things calm down soon

But yes it's me who should of got out of my car and told him to fuck off. Wow. Let's hope you have more compassion for women in violent relationships and women who are raped.

Oh ffs. Calling you out on sexism ("males" to protect us) has nothing to do with lack of compassion for victims of domestic violence or assault.

In terms of the actual question, if he were merely a dickhead, then no, you shouldn't tell his employer. But if he uses his job as a weapon to threaten people with, then certainly you can do. You can say that your neighbor has repeatedly attempted to use his position as a council worker to intimidate people he is in disputes with. Whether you want to do that is entirely up to you, but I'd imagine they'd be interested.

@ChickensMightFly

Thank you. Hopefully a quieter evening tonight!

This thread reads like an episode of extenders.

Actually I hear the soap Neighbours may be being axed so this would make a nice filler

I would contact the council and complain OP. He is chucking it out there he works there so put in a complaint.

OP you have vented your spleen on here. I suggest you take a few deep breaths before doing anything else or it may come back to bite you on the arse.
Best wishes

[quote Happyinmyownworld]@bluecoffeecups

Goodness me. They are working up the road already and have a full professional website. A scam? Why? Because they are travellers and search for work in a different way? You can't tar everyone with the same brush.[/quote]
No. Nothing to do with who they are. Just a well-known thing, you know, people turning up at your house and offering to do some building work. Which may or may not need doing. Which they then may or may not decide to charge you way over the odds for.

You were the one who described them as travellers when there was no need to do so in the context of the thread anyway.