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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

How much money in wedding card?

32 replies

MummytoP18 · 30/08/2020 12:09

My partner is going to his friends wedding, me and our daughter are not attending as due to covid it’s a small 30 person church ceremony followed by drinks etc at his parents home. I’ve only been to close family members weddings before where we have bought a nice gift but since I don’t really know the couple we are opting for money in a card. How much would you put in?

OP posts:
3rdNamechange · 30/08/2020 12:11

£50 ? I suppose it depends how long they've known each other and what you can afford ?

chipsandpeas · 30/08/2020 12:12

i normally give 50 if invited to the full day/night and 25 if just a evening guest

Tartyflette · 30/08/2020 12:13

What does your DH think? How close is he to his friend?
50 quid sounds ok to me unless he is a very close friend.

lockdownalli · 30/08/2020 12:17

I m not sure I understand.

Surely your DP knows the couple well or he wouldn't be one of just 30 people invited Confused

So why isn't he choosing a gift? I am not sure why you think it falls to you? I really would not put money in a wedding card, it seems pretty crass to me, sorry.

FredaFox · 30/08/2020 12:20

50 is reasonable if he is going alone, if he is one of just 30 he is clearly important to them

Florencex · 30/08/2020 12:29

I would leave it to DP to decide what to do.

WhoWouldHaveThoughtThat · 30/08/2020 12:57

I think that last time I did something like that I just sellotaped half-a-crown inside the card.

But it was a long time ago, and there was a war on.

SandyY2K · 30/08/2020 12:59

It depends...but I'd say £50 in this situation.

katy1213 · 30/08/2020 13:02

His job to manage this, not yours. I agree that shoving money is a bit crass but that'll be his crassness not yours.

Suzi888 · 30/08/2020 13:05

£50

user1487194234 · 30/08/2020 13:05

If they have asked for money then that's ok
I mean I wouldn't but if they have it's fine
I normally spend about £100 so would give that

TheIckabog · 30/08/2020 13:08

@WhoWouldHaveThoughtThat

I think that last time I did something like that I just sellotaped half-a-crown inside the card.

But it was a long time ago, and there was a war on.

How much is half-a-crown in today’s money?
WhoUsedMyName · 30/08/2020 13:09

I'd say anything from £25-£100 depending on your financial situation too, i always think that's important to remember if your hard up and they know that personally I'd feel awful to receive £100.

WhoUsedMyName · 30/08/2020 13:10

Saying that we have a really rich uncle who put £500 in a card and although very wealthy we aren't close and were shocked

OverTheRainbow88 · 30/08/2020 13:10

Probs about £70 for one person.

Pebblexox · 30/08/2020 13:11

Money in a card is hardly crass. It's what most couples would prefer these days!
I usually opt for anything between £50 and £100 depending on my relationship with the bride and groom. Leave it to your dh to figure out.

arethereanyleftatall · 30/08/2020 13:12

Between £50 and £100

Nquartz · 30/08/2020 13:13

I'd probably give £50 too.

And money is much more common as a wedding gift these days & isnt thought of as crass by most people anymore.

Pbbananabagel · 30/08/2020 13:15

We’re not super well off so usually put £40 in between the two of us and most wedding gifts we received from couple friends our age were similar.

Meme69 · 30/08/2020 13:16

Sorry, but you must all have money to burn!! £20 is fair enough. I don't spend £100 on my own kids birthdays so wouldn't spend it on a wedding gift for adults

ZigZagPlant · 30/08/2020 13:18

If we’re not that close I put £30 in, if close and plush wedding £50.

I always think how much the day is likely to have cost them per head!

modgepodge · 30/08/2020 13:22

@ZigZagPlant

If we’re not that close I put £30 in, if close and plush wedding £50.

I always think how much the day is likely to have cost them per head!

My wedding cost us about £125 per head...hardly anyone gave us that much!! I definitely would have been surprised if people had given us anywhere near that. Apart from a few rich aunts/grandparents, most people gave us money/gifts costing around £50 if a couple was attending. Some gave us nothing, which was fine too.
Potterpotterpotter · 30/08/2020 13:27

Close friend normally £100
Family £250

ZigZagPlant · 30/08/2020 13:27

@modgepodge

That’s why I said I try. You can’t know unless you’ve outright asked.

TheHappyHerbivore · 30/08/2020 13:31

I tend to put in £50 as a base, up to £100 if close to the couple. But whatever you can afford is absolutely fine.