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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is he too young?

54 replies

Ruminmycoffee · 29/08/2020 22:57

I'm 40 (f) Wibu to date a man in his late twenties (28 ) do you think he's too young? Too much of an age gap ?

OP posts:
Manolin · 30/08/2020 07:34

At 26 I was with a 43 years old woman for about 18 months. It was a lovely time and she had a new, awoken hunger that matched mine. There was romance, friendship and immense fun. The sex was amazing. Woo hoo! 😍😍😍 Our relationship was always a bit tricky socially, but she handled it the best of everyone.

In my heart and mind it was never to last. She had already three children, one of whom was not that much younger than me. My ‘conformed’ life was ahead of me and in it meeting a woman of my own age, having children together, each for the first time, doing those new things together, saving, buying a new home etc was where my life was destined.

I was young and moving around following career choices and it waned, then fizzled out. But we spoke for a while and there was never any bad feeling. It was a lovely time and she moved on also.

Here OP, he has children already. He has probably done that early stuff. It therefore depends on what you are looking for. And how mature he is. This could be the start of a long, even life-long, relationship. It depends on whether you are on a journey together, or whether one of you sees what you have as a metaphorical overnight stop. You will know when and if ‘the journey’ arrives. It hasn’t yet.

The previous poster who mentioned Mr and Madame Macron was right to use their example. It’s also a good one. Their relationship is a journey isn’t it? Their bonds may be different to mine or yours, but they certainly have them.

Good luck and enjoy. He may not be who you ultimately end up with. Life never gives us that kind of guarantee. But no reason why he cannot be part if your journey.

Cassavaflower · 30/08/2020 09:10

I was in your position at the end of last year.
In my case there were also cultural and religious differences.
He also has two young kids.
The best decision of my life was giving it a go.
He is 16 years younger than me and honestly the best thing to ever happen to me.
There are no games, no drama, no second guessing. Just lots of love, warmth, care and consideration.
Anyone who has a problem with it well, that's their problem.
Good luck.
If he is right for you he will show you through his behaviour.

PaperMonster · 30/08/2020 09:19

I did when I was that age.

nosswith · 30/08/2020 09:21

Falls within the half plus seven rule. Useful if you intend being French President!!!

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