To think people are over looking the benefits of going to work

[Poptart4]

I keep hearing about how great working from home is. No commute, saving money, more family time etc.

But I think people are over looking the benefit's of actually going to work.

• Getting out of the house, personally I dont think its healthy to spend all (most) of your time within the same 4 walls.
• The social aspect of working. Alot of people make friends or at least acquaintances through work.
• I know alot of people who met their partner through work. And alot who just had fun casual hook ups with co-workers. Either way there will be less chances at romance because you will have less social interaction.
• As a mother I find going out to work gives me a life outside of being mammy. It gives me a little independence for myself. If I was working from home all of the time I would never be away from the children. Never get a break.
• No after work drinks, office xmas parties etc.
• I've also read some threads on here about couples fighting because one or both of them is working from home and there getting on each others nerves. Couples need time apart.

I really think once the novelty of working from home wears off alot of people are going to miss the hustle and bustle of office life. And alot of people are going to end up depressed. Especially for people who live alone. The lack of social interaction will impact them the most.

I think a lot of the difficulties people have experienced with wfh over the last 5 months have more to do with Covid than the practicalities of wfh. I mean none of us would have chosen to wfh while also trying to entertain toddlers or cajole a reluctant 8 year old to do their maths when they’d rather watch tv! That’s quite different to wfh with schools open and activities and childcare available.

Also, for many of us it was a very sudden, completely unplanned change to our working lives. IF this is going to be the norm in the future then young people will know the set up when they apply for jobs. They presumably won’t then choose to move into these pokey, depressing bedsits they would never have chosen to live in except for the fact that they needed to be able to commute to their place of work.

I can certainly see that there are pros and cons to home based working and a lot of that can be about “life stage” but some of the negatives expressed here are things that are within peoples control.
If you miss your walk or cycle to work every morning then why not go for a walk or cycle every morning?
If you like wearing nice clothes and makeup then wear nice clothes and put some slap on!
If you miss after work drinks and nights out with your colleagues than arrange these.
If you enjoyed chatting to colleagues through the day then arrange a virtual coffee break.
I get that work is a big part of some people’s social lives but if that’s the case and you miss it then get proactive!

A huge societal shift like this (IF it happens to the extent some think it will) is always going to have negatives that won’t be solved overnight. Businesses will have to develop new ways to ensure learning and development and employees will have to get used to different ways of communicating and interacting. Change always brings difficulties but they’re not insurmountable and lets be honest - working life was far from utopian for most people prior to March 2020.

@ChickenFriedFudge

YANBU. Same applies for people who could work and don't. Neil's ExW says she can't get a job because 'When would she do the food shop' and said there is no benefit to the kids whatsoever with her working.

How can you possibly compare people being happy to work, but from home, to people who don't want to work at all?

No one is saying, if they couldn't WFH, they wouldn't work at all. As noted previously, many of us were working in offices for decades.

I've chosen to work part time and work close to my office, so I am not seeing any benefits from reduced commute time or more family time as I had those benefits anyway. To the PP who pointed out you can always go for a walk/cycle in the morning if you miss walking/cycling to work - yes, in theory you can, but psychologically it's different - it's no longer a walk to get somewhere with a purpose, but a walk for the sake of it. Much harder to motivate yourself to do it if the weather is bad as well.

As well as some of the points mentioned by OP

• my job involves talking to people. It is more tiring to do this on the telephone. Some days I can spend 5 hours+ on the phone and I seem to have a permanent headache.
• office politics are worse, not better. People are having meetings and only inviting the people they want - and it's not obvious as it would be if half your team suddenly got up and walked off in an office. This would be fixed by better communication, but the people who are told everything they need to know don't see any need to communicate it out. in an office you can ask what went on in a meeting that you didn't go to. If you don't even know there was a meeting, then you don't know what you don't know.

Oh come on @RedskyAtnight, really? Huge societal change can’t happen because some people find it hard to motivate themselves? That’s so passive!

The rest of your post is specific to your jobs office politics which is shitty but again, not a reason to slam on the brakes and prevent change that has the potential to bring about huge positives at a national level.

I thought this thread was about the benefits of going to work, not huge societal change? Perhaps I read the thread title incorrectly.

I prefer going to work and not working at home. If other people prefer it the other way round, that's fine, but let's not pretend there are no work related benefits.

@Pelleas because the same principles apply. Getting out the house, feeling like you get a break, feeling like your own person, having a purpose.

Anyway OP, YANBU. DH is WFH until January at the earliest and he's really struggling.

[quote ChickenFriedFudge]@Pelleas because the same principles apply. Getting out the house, feeling like you get a break, feeling like your own person, having a purpose.

Anyway OP, YANBU. DH is WFH until January at the earliest and he's really struggling.[/quote]
I don't need to go to work to get out of the house.

There's nothing at home I need a break from.

If anything, I feel more my own person at home than at work because I don't have to pretend to be a jolly, sociable sort of person all day.

As long as I am working I have a purpose - the work I do at home is exactly the same work I would do in the office - the purpose is unaltered.

I've no idea what it feels like not to work at all, because I've worked full time my whole life, but I really don't see how not working at all is similar to working from home.

because I've worked full time my whole life

My whole adult life, I mean. My parents weren't sending me up chimneys as an infant!

I think more availability of WFH could really benefit working parents and also disabled people, which would be a big gain for society.

So many employers were resistant to WFH and thought it could never work - so many have been proved wrong. I'd like to see the advent of the standard 4 day week next.

WFH definitely can be problematic though. The physical environment can potentially be way better and more individualised at home, but if you are sharing small or unsuitable spaces with others it can be grim (I'm thinking busy open plan family homes with young children or a single bedroom in a shared house). I think there will be an increase in demand for home office spaces, garden offices and coworking spaces.

I have not missed being in an overcrowded office which is either far too hot or far too cold, constant interruptions and noise, horrible toilets. I do not miss having to wear uncomfortable "smart" shoes and clothes - or having to buy them. I also think there is less bullying going on when it's virtual rather than face to face.

I have been surprised at how much I have missed the casual everyday social interactions of the office and the support and companionship of colleagues. Going to work gave me loads of acquaintances as well as friends...the friendships endure but the acquaintanceships are lost and it is a bigger loss than I would have expected. I had regular wonderful chats with a wide range of people who really added to my life although I wouldn't have wanted to see them outside of work really.

Everybody seems to think that introverts must love WFH and that if you hate it you must be an extrovert. It's not as simple as that.

I'm an introvert. BECAUSE I'm an introvert I've never been into socialising in big groups and have always found it harder to make friends.

Having no social life didn't really bother me before - I had my DH and DC and I got my "fix" of human contact and interaction at work.

I DIDN'T go to office drinks or parties, I didn't engage in " office flirtations" and most of the people in my office probably don't even remember me! But still, I miss them.

I miss all the wee interactions that are part of life - chats about the weather, complimenting someone on their dress or new hairstyle, moaning because the printer is broken. Even when we were all just working away quietly there was still a camaraderie.

I feel like WFH has brutally exposed the fact that I have no friends, and the loneliness is crushing me. It's worse since my DC went back to school. Every article I read about how much everyone loves WFH intensifies the feeling that I'm a sad person and needy person and that there's something wrong with me. And every time I read that work culture has changed forever I slip deeper into despair.

I've now been diagnosed with anxiety and depression and am on anti-depressants. I know the loneliness wasn't the only reason - I think I also burned out with the increased workload coupled with childcare and home education. But WFH is a huge factor. I did everything right - getting up early, taking exercise, getting outdoors, trying to establish a routine - but I just can't do it anymore. I would never, ever have signed up for this.

If people like me seem defensive it may be because many of us are depressed. Just something to bear in mind.

Yes I met my friend at the train station and we started talking due to the train being delayed but we would have met each other anyway as I joined a local group a week later and she was their too. The chat at the train station only broke the ice but we would have been friends anyway. You see groups, shops, gyms all opening up again and great ways to meet like minded people. I’ve never actually made a real friend in a workplace.

@CousinRosamund

Everybody seems to think that introverts must love WFH and that if you hate it you must be an extrovert. It's not as simple as that.

I'm an introvert. BECAUSE I'm an introvert I've never been into socialising in big groups and have always found it harder to make friends.

Having no social life didn't really bother me before - I had my DH and DC and I got my "fix" of human contact and interaction at work.

I DIDN'T go to office drinks or parties, I didn't engage in " office flirtations" and most of the people in my office probably don't even remember me! But still, I miss them.

I miss all the wee interactions that are part of life - chats about the weather, complimenting someone on their dress or new hairstyle, moaning because the printer is broken. Even when we were all just working away quietly there was still a camaraderie.

I feel like WFH has brutally exposed the fact that I have no friends, and the loneliness is crushing me. It's worse since my DC went back to school. Every article I read about how much everyone loves WFH intensifies the feeling that I'm a sad person and needy person and that there's something wrong with me. And every time I read that work culture has changed forever I slip deeper into despair.

I've now been diagnosed with anxiety and depression and am on anti-depressants. I know the loneliness wasn't the only reason - I think I also burned out with the increased workload coupled with childcare and home education. But WFH is a huge factor. I did everything right - getting up early, taking exercise, getting outdoors, trying to establish a routine - but I just can't do it anymore. I would never, ever have signed up for this.

If people like me seem defensive it may be because many of us are depressed. Just something to bear in mind.

This resonates with me. I have ASD.

People aren't overlooking those things

However people like different things. The points you raised I don't enjoy doing so I am perfectly happy WFH

@CousinRosamund

Everybody seems to think that introverts must love WFH and that if you hate it you must be an extrovert. It's not as simple as that.

I'm an introvert. BECAUSE I'm an introvert I've never been into socialising in big groups and have always found it harder to make friends.

Having no social life didn't really bother me before - I had my DH and DC and I got my "fix" of human contact and interaction at work.

I DIDN'T go to office drinks or parties, I didn't engage in " office flirtations" and most of the people in my office probably don't even remember me! But still, I miss them.

I miss all the wee interactions that are part of life - chats about the weather, complimenting someone on their dress or new hairstyle, moaning because the printer is broken. Even when we were all just working away quietly there was still a camaraderie.

I feel like WFH has brutally exposed the fact that I have no friends, and the loneliness is crushing me. It's worse since my DC went back to school. Every article I read about how much everyone loves WFH intensifies the feeling that I'm a sad person and needy person and that there's something wrong with me. And every time I read that work culture has changed forever I slip deeper into despair.

I've now been diagnosed with anxiety and depression and am on anti-depressants. I know the loneliness wasn't the only reason - I think I also burned out with the increased workload coupled with childcare and home education. But WFH is a huge factor. I did everything right - getting up early, taking exercise, getting outdoors, trying to establish a routine - but I just can't do it anymore. I would never, ever have signed up for this.

If people like me seem defensive it may be because many of us are depressed. Just something to bear in mind.

I can really relate to this. I am an introvert and also struggle to make friends. I have DP and DC but really enjoy the social aspect of work.

I've been lucky in the sense that my office never closed during the pandemic. I am also lucky that I work with nice people and everyone gets on. It wasnt always like that. We've had our fair share of office bitches. All gone now thankfully.

The thought of wfh becoming the norm fills me with dread. Just because I'm an introvert doesn't mean I never want to be around people at all.

I've had 4 months working from home and am now back at work and I much prefer going out to work than working from home. I enjoy the drive there and feel able to focus on my work with less distractions. I also like the structure and routine to my work day. I now have more variety to my work which breaks the day up.

Socially I'm enjoying spending my break talking to colleagues- this is something I have really missed WFH.

@Frequency

I had zero work/life balance when in the office and I'm dreading going back. My commute home was approx two hours due to unreliable public transport. I can only see this getting worse with the strain covid has placed on the transport infrastructure. Prior to wfh my life was literally sleep, travel, work, travel, sleep rinse and repeat. I have an extra 3 hours in a day mow and I'm not constantly shattered from getting up early to catch the first bus which is the only bus which ever runs on time.

Pretty much same here.

We must not allow the fat cat capitalist class and presenteist maniacs to force us back to a desolate life!

It’s not normal sitting in a sterile office hour after hour like animals in a pen. My work is sometimes interesting. It’s the commute and the office bits I hate.

I miss all the wee interactions that are part of life - chats about the weather, complimenting someone on their dress or new hairstyle, moaning because the printer is broken. Even when we were all just working away quietly there was still a camaraderie.

Then you’re not an introvert. Extroverts get their energy primarily from other people. You may be only slightly extrovert and you may have other issues, but you’re not an introvert.

@cinammonbuns

I have a way more practical reason why WFH is not necessarily a great idea. What is stopping companies from outsourcing their jobs to English speakers in developing countries if everything is configured so that people can work from home?

What is the point of a higher salary in London if the London companies could just higher people up north and pay them less.

I wonder if 20 years down the line the move to WFH after CV will be marked as the demise of the majority of services work in developed countries.

Having been a management consultant specialising in offshoring roles to other countries I really don't agree with this.

Companies are fully aware (and have been for years) that all the technology exists to offshore any service role.

That isn't what has stopped them from offshoring the roles.

What's stopped them is primarily customer perception and barriers in terms of cultural working styles. These aren't likely to change any time soon.

Besides, if it did a lot of us could have a much nicer lifestyle working from cheaper places to live than the UK 🤷🏻‍♀️

I for one am looking forward to the pandemic being over and working from Bali one month a year.

had zero work/life balance when in the office and I'm dreading going back. My commute home was approx two hours due to unreliable public transport. I can only see this getting worse with the strain covid has placed on the transport infrastructure. Prior to wfh my life was literally sleep, travel, work, travel, sleep rinse and repeat.

I couldn't live like that. Life is too short.

@FinnyStory

The thing that troubles me is staff development. Yes, if you've been doing the same job forever you can probably work well at home but how are you going to share skills, inspire others, be inspired by others, train your successor etc etc?

It works "now" in many cases, with an already established staff but I don't think it works as a permanent model. Imagine being the new guy on an already established team and trying to build relationships and learn the culture/industry from people you never meet because they're all happily avoiding the commute.

Long term that has to be bad for business, even if people can kid themselves they're more efficient at home, they're efficiently doing what they always do, there's no incidental interactions for sharing ideas or inspiration, no progress.

My friend has joined a new company in a new role during lockdown and was expecting it to be difficult. She said that she's actually found it surprisingly straightforward and felt like part of the team from week one...

@CousinRosamund

Everybody seems to think that introverts must love WFH and that if you hate it you must be an extrovert. It's not as simple as that.

I'm an introvert. BECAUSE I'm an introvert I've never been into socialising in big groups and have always found it harder to make friends.

Having no social life didn't really bother me before - I had my DH and DC and I got my "fix" of human contact and interaction at work.

I DIDN'T go to office drinks or parties, I didn't engage in " office flirtations" and most of the people in my office probably don't even remember me! But still, I miss them.

I miss all the wee interactions that are part of life - chats about the weather, complimenting someone on their dress or new hairstyle, moaning because the printer is broken. Even when we were all just working away quietly there was still a camaraderie.

I feel like WFH has brutally exposed the fact that I have no friends, and the loneliness is crushing me. It's worse since my DC went back to school. Every article I read about how much everyone loves WFH intensifies the feeling that I'm a sad person and needy person and that there's something wrong with me. And every time I read that work culture has changed forever I slip deeper into despair.

I've now been diagnosed with anxiety and depression and am on anti-depressants. I know the loneliness wasn't the only reason - I think I also burned out with the increased workload coupled with childcare and home education. But WFH is a huge factor. I did everything right - getting up early, taking exercise, getting outdoors, trying to establish a routine - but I just can't do it anymore. I would never, ever have signed up for this.

If people like me seem defensive it may be because many of us are depressed. Just something to bear in mind.

This is me exactly. Before I was made redundant my 3 days in the office with people I'd worked with for up to 10 years was perfect. I hated the thought of starting a new job remotely, at the same time as my very few local NCT friends aren't socialising due to vulnerable relatives.

If you miss after work drinks and nights out with your colleagues than arrange these

Not possible. We all live too far away from each other. Our local rail service are operating on a reduced timetable and currently the last train back from town leaves at 8.35 pm now.

If you enjoyed chatting to colleagues through the day then arrange a virtual coffee break.

We already do that

it's no longer a walk to get somewhere with a purpose, but a walk for the sake of it. Much harder to motivate yourself to do it if the weather is bad as well.

I know exactly what you mean. I am lucky enough to live in a pretty, rural part of the world, and the novelty of walking once a day has worn off. We still walk, but are getting the car out to find other walks that we haven’t done before. I have noticed far fewer people walking these days as well, and much more traffic on the roads as people are driving instead of using public transport.

@CousinRosamund I hope things pick up for you. You have nailed it your comments about the daily interactions that simply cannot be replicated on Teams/Skype.

This thread is quite an eye opener, and it is clear that both sides (I include myself) struggle to understand the other side’s needs. Those of us who thrive from being with other people can’t understand those who don’t. And those who prefer their own company and, in some cases appear to positively dislike being with other people, don’t understand those of us who do.

Also you have to bear in mind that what people are doing right now is not 'normal' working from home.

Normal working from home:

• No children around during the day as they are in childcare or education

• You can work from local coffee shops, cafes, bistros if you get bored at home. I used to do this at least once a week

• You can work in local co-working spaces, I expect the number of these to rise if more people work from home

• You can use local networking / professional meet ups to have a social element. I'm just setting one up in our market town with a friend for this very reason.

New social and networking opportunities will arise as things evolve and once the pandemic is over...new options for grabbing lunch closer to home in suburban areas, etc will be created.

In this way it's an exciting time for anyone with some good ideas...if I had the capital I'd definitely be setting up a boutique co-working space with events/networking right now.

I'm another one who is depressed and anxious from home. I have a double widescreen display set up and it is THERE all the time. There is nowhere it can go where I can't see it, there is nowhere to pack it away to. Plus they are heavy and manual handling them all the time is a real risk.

I'm living at work and not coping with it. I don't want my home to be an office. I had two weeks off recently and it was no break at all as all my equipment was there, reminding me of all the stuff I had to do.

I really need to be back in the office.